It's just laundry - nothing to be embarrassed about

[Aparecium]

I took the family's clean laundry off the airer, folded it and put it in a basket. I gave the basket to 17yo ds and asked him to sort it and put piles of clean laundry on everyone's beds for them to put away.

When dh does the laundry, he either tells people to claim their kit straight from the airer, or he sorts it as he takes it off the airer, so the dc who distributes it just has to pick up ready-sorted piles.

Apparently ds told dh that he prefers dh's way, as he was embarrassed handling his mum's and his sister's underwear.

YANBU - it's just clean clothes and ds should be grateful he wasn't asked to put on a load as then he would be handling dirty laundry.

YABU - give the bashful teen boy a break.

Women that were washing the underwear of a man they were having sex with and children they birthed.

And the OP is also the same kind of woman. She isn't complaining about that. Her DS is saying he feels uncomfortable handling his Mum and sisters knickers.

Ok, well I suppose they can just leave them in a pile so? Or stop seeing them as something sexual when it relates to their own families? They're bits of fabric, probably sewn by some poor kid in China.

Hmmm. I understand the weird feeling but think this is one of those things he just needs to “get over”. Like many other things in life.

I would feel fine with my mums undies but probably a bit odd if I had to to my MILs. However if she needed a hand, I would just get over it and do it.

Same for my husband if me or my daughter have to send him on a panicked tampon run - he might feel odd but he’ll get over it and I know the choice I’d make between a man who won’t do these things and one that will. Your son will grow up to be someone’s partner so I think it’s probably worth starting to learn and the under wear is clean so you are minimising the ick.

Or just use the DH’s method of sorting as you take off the airer?

They're bits of fabric, probably sewn by some poor kid in China.

Oh wow, here we go, that's an impressive moralistic gear change.

At 17 I'd be expecting him to wash and dry his own washing!

Assuming his sister is also a teen, and assuming mum hasn’t graduated to only wearing ‘big pants’ I can understand that handling lacy knickers or thongs may be a bit uncomfortable for him 😁

Kind of wasteful for each person to do their own laundry when there are 4 people in the house.

Or just put them away in everyone's room? They're not nuclear!

Leaving them in a pile isn't an option though. He's been specifically asked to go through a pile of knickers and bras (amongst other things), and decide which are Mum's and which are sis's to sort into two options. That's the OP.

Personally I wouldn't be that bothered, I was allocated the job of laundry sorting at that age as it happens, but I wouldn't judge a teenaged boy who was.

There's a massive difference between siblings and partners/friends

My brothers happily buy sanitary products for their wives/gf's but I never would have wanted them to buy them for me, likewise with sorting out my underwear as a teenager. They're not the same.

They're just clothes though! Ugh, idk, when I was young you just got on with it. My brothers did too. I'm not judging the boys, if they're brought up with this dramatic attitude, it's likely they'll be confused over it all. The reality is, they're just clothes. And the sooner men and boys see this stuff as 'just clothes' the better. The ick of other people's dirty clothes is a bit different, but equally, it's something you just have to get on with in life.

I have 3 baskets - 1 for me and dh, 1 for dd and 1 for dd. When I empty the airer I sort into the baskets so they can be taken to the respective bedrooms to be put away

And when sorting I have to read labels so I can tell whose boxers are whose for the boys and whose pants are whose for the girls. Can be hard to tell when things are similar colours. Although I have sometimes made mistakes and dh has ended up with my pants in his drawer!

I also agree with DH.

If he goes on to get a partner then presumably he might have laundry duties so he had best get used to dealing with laundry now. I am guessing you aren’t regularly washing a lot of Ann Summers type underwear anyway, so what’s the big deal!

Behave yourself

FFS

Ah bless. He’s entitled to his feelings

Can he leave the underwear in the basket for you and dd to claim later?

I'm with you.

if 'grabbing off the line' was a thing here, dc would have a linedrobe in addition to their floordrobe.

What’s he gonna do when his girlfriend has a period?

🙄

If you don't think that handling your girlfriend's underwear/periods is different to handling your mum's thongs, then I really don't know what to say, lol.

I am surprised that so many posters conflate girlfriends' and partners' knickers with siblings' and parents' knickers.

Also surprised that so many posters think that teenagers should be doing their own laundry. We are a family, we live together in a family home, we look after each other, we all muck in with the jobs.

I always think that families who do individual people's laundry are either terribly wasteful or have an awful lot of clothes so they can wait to make up a load