To ask what your biggest problem in life is at the moment?

[Biggybigbiggles]

Just that really... mine is that I feel frumpy and ugly. Having always been tiny, I've gotten to 30 and I suddenly just feel disgusted with what I see any time someone takes a photo of me.

If you could click your fingers and remove a problem you have, what would it be?

Losing my ex-partner to suicide at the age of 24, a few weeks after we broke up and a few days after he saw me with my now DH. I knew he was depressed and I didn’t have the emotional intelligence to take it seriously. I found it annoying and an inconvenience and told him he was “mental”.

We lived in a small university city at the time and the last time I saw him I was holding hands with DH on our second date and I just walked right past him and blanked him.

I know the outcome would have been different if I’d acted differently during that couple of months and had some understanding and empathy.

That feeling of yearning for someone and wanting to go back in time and live life again and do things differently. All the things I desperately want to say but can’t. The angst of knowing the moment has gone and there is nothing I can do and his life and essence are gone. The guilt and pain for his lovely parents who have lost everything and knowing how different their lives could have been. Having to bury it in the back of my mind and live my life and pretend everything’s fine when he’s always there.

Employment uncertainty for me, waiting for a restructure to be communicated at work 😕

Your not alone. Same circumstances and my audhd hasn't been to school either since Sept. 😔 it is soul destroying

Didn't want to pass by and not give you an enormous virtual hug x

No words really other than I’m sorry you’re going through this, and your DS.
I hope he finds peace in his own mind soon

Fucking hip problem after knee replacement.
Really painful and I'm terrified I might need further surgery.

You need to forgive yourself darling.

No one knows what other people are actually capable of.
Its one thing saying it, another actually going through with it and most people who are successful, well you would never have known they were on that tragic path.
I know it may feel different because you said that you were lacking in compassion when he saw you with your now DH, but you didn’t kill him. You really didn’t.
His mental health did that. Not you. x

Just been told I need 3 surgeries, the last one being HUGE (think 5 days in ITU and at least two weeks in hospital).

Being autistic.

Both parents with dementia, one lives in a carehome 3 hours away, the other is in the early stages but lives close by.

I am waiting for the police and the CPS to get their arses into gear and decide whether the van driver who killed my DM by reversing over her will be prosecuted or not. I've been waiting since September and I can't move forward.

@CalmFox sorry to hear about your parents. Mine both also have dementia and it’s hard to explain the impact it’s had on me.

@RobertaFirmino I am so sorry about your DM. I can’t believe you’re still waiting to hear about a prosecution.

I pray that justice will prevail 🙏🏻❤️‍🩹

Trying to get a specialist school for my autistic dd12 who hasn't been in school since November and knowing she's highly unlikely to get a place due to high demand and lack of places.

I don't get much time to myself between two v young children, work and being a single parent. I also haven't had any sort of romantic or sexual relationship since the second was conceived > 2 years ago (XP, father of both, good friend now) which is a bit lonely sometimes, I'm only mid 30s.

That's about it. I have a good life, I'm happy and very lucky.

Being relentlessly bullied at work
Losing family members recently
Health problems

I’m very sorry you feel this way. My friends who have visited family in Israel recently have told me they feel safer there than here. The dangers and stresses are just different. Could you come for a break?

My lovely DD is 24 tomorrow and we will celebrate her birthday of course but she has not one friend to go out with and it makes me desperately sad. She has a learning disability and finds it hard to make connections and sustain them. Her birthday is always tinged with a slight edge of desperation.

The last couple of years have been a nightmare. Partner has vascular disease and is now a double amputee - second amputation last year. Has ongoing cardiac problems too. Mum lives with us, and was diagnosed with vascular dementia a few years ago. She’s now in the advanced stages. I have a disability from a birth defect which causes mobility problems and two years ago was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, meaning l’m now a wheelchair user. To top it off l was diagnosed with breast cancer after a routine mammogram a couple of months ago and am on treatment to try to shrink the tumour. I’ll be undergoing surgery in the next couple of months - most likely a mastectomy. I have no idea how any of us are going to cope with the aftermath.

Well, update: now my biggest problem is how to integrate and socialize my new young crazy rescue cat with my existing lady. I've been very lucky with my cat pairings before. This one, not so lucky. At least I have space for them to each be separate and resident cat spends a lot of time outdoors in summer by choice.

Its hard work.

Knowing that my DH will never walk again and need bowel care and help with feeding himself for the rest of his life

I know this post is from a little while ago but have you asked your doctor about having a stoma bag fitted - wouldn’t that give you your freedom back? - edit I’m actually not sure if I have posted that before? So sorry if I have it might have been I have replied to a similar post or could be repeating myself. If so sorry.

Waiting for my currently healthy 85 year old parent to become infirm and requiring care etc. and knowing the care won't be easily available or affordable.

It's a constant worry.

I really wanted a new Loungefly bag to take to Disney Land Paris and someone was selling one on Vinted at a great price. Then I realised I’d not paid for a cabin bag so had no way to take it on the plane so couldn’t buy it as it wouldn’t fit in my regular rucksack along with my clothes. First world problems 😢