What to say to sexist salesman asking for my 'husband' to be present for quote? Should i say something?

[Sailawaygirl]

So man selling windows (well known company) came to door saying he had done some work on a house up street and they have a good deal atm ect ect. It just so happens I do need new windows and getting quotes is on my todo list so for once door knock could be helpful. ( i will obviously contact more than just his company but its a start)

my AIBU is --- in door step conversation he asks if we own house ( obviously important). he then asks if I have a husband, I say yes ( we arent married but I know what he means and he is probably asking for finance reasons ect)
He then says he wants to come back ' when my husband is around' so he can talk to us both!!!!! i say DP is working today but window man can come back to give me a full quote latter in day. He then insists on coming when 'husband' is back from work or at a weekend so husband can have quote!!! I tell sales person that i deal with quotes and DIY stuff and to just deal with me. Its a loose quote im not going to sign on dotted line today! He says it so i can choose what colour handles on doors ect!!!! I tell him im more interested in energy efficiency and cost and that i dont want him to come when DP is back from work as this impacts family time.
Then when he takes my details and asks for my title - i say ms , he says mrs and then miss and i correct no ms.

How can a salesman be so out of tune with the times? he wasn't an older sales person either!!!!

He said someone would phone me for feedback after, AIBU to bring up that i felt he had a sexist attitude? how do i phrase it constructively

This!

They all do and there is a good reason
Too many easy-minded people sign up and then want to back out because their OH
was not consulted.

This is an elementary sales banter.

I can't see the offence from any angel whatsoever.

Case closed.

It depends on whether he would have said to your husband that he’d only talk with you present as well. If it’s Anglia windows run for the hills, they will never stop pestering you for the rest of eternity.

Well, it might be because he wants to talk to both home owners as he has to ensure that both are in agreement about the work. Maybe there have been instances of one half of a couple claiming they won't pay for the work as they did not personally agree to it initially

This is always the excuse.

The reality is that they are highly unlikely to ask a man when his wife will be home.

It's sexist. Lets not make excuses for these people.

Agreed! We used them for our windows and they kept phoning for years. I ignored them after a while, but they then used my local code to make it look like they were someone else. When I told them data protection laws and the Telephone Preference Service applied to them as well I was told I was being rude and "most" people liked them being helpful. Arsehole.

He just wants to get both (potential) decision makers together, make sure he is addressing both peoples requirements and present the quote and maybe even offer an on the spot signing discount.

It's more usual if you are in a couple that you make large spending decisions together.

He could have gone about it somewhat differently though and not given you such a negative impression.

I would be more worried about whether the windows were any good, the price and whether I thought they were going to do a good job. So many cowboys around these days.

It’s a sales tactic so they can lure you with a ‘huge’ discount if you commit straight away. It happened to my husband too.

I’ve had this before. From what I understand it’s so one partner doesn’t say “Yeah great”, and for the salesman to make arrangements, only for the other partner to throw a shit fit at the price.

Yes do say something..
.bollocks

It’s also happened where a salesman asked DH to make sure I was there too

A while ago there was a large well k own kitchen company that was notorious for wanting the husband to be there. I know it was all over the press at the time and I believed they stopped. But clearly other companies are still at it.

I think they like both of couple to be there - so it's harder to back or or disagree but when we had Anglia windows do this to us they actually failed to give us a written quote despite us asking for one several times and being the whole reason for visit and amount kept going up and down for various reasons and discounts - he also mainly spoke to DH.

We went for a local company who spoke with just me and did a fantastic job and were much cheaper.

I understand your frustration at this guy but also agree that it’s because he’s experienced lots of women who say they have to speak to their other half.

On a similar note, DH and I visited a caterer to chat about an event we were hosting. Caterer, a man, kept on speaking to my husband despite me asking the questions. Shook hands with him and told him he looked forward to hearing from him. He lost that contract to someone who is charging us more for the same food but realised it was me who would be making the decision.

Yep. This is it absolutely.

It's an awful sales technique and if they get into your house you'll struggle to get them back out again without signing up there & then. Chances are you'll end up with their finance too which won't be a great deal.
You want a local company who comes recommended by someone you know, and who gives you a quote and you can go to their store or equivalent to look at different styles and door handles etc. Going back many years, our window & door company had every different door design in their workshop/factory and swapped handles around so you could see what 'your door' would look like. And even then they weren't chasing for a signature.

You should go with Safestyle UK, that way ‘you buy one, you get one free!’

If you are actually married you are both jointly and severally liable for debts surely?

I let A in 20 years ago and he stayed for 4 hours. After 2 hours I stood up to feed the kids and he wouldn't leave. Just sat with DP till I got back. I don't think we even got a quote in the end.
Over the next 16 years I would get sales calls from 3 of their offices saying they were following up on the visit. 16 YEARS!!

S were no better. He spent 45 minutes v e r y s l o w l y filling in my name and address on a form, asking for tea, following me to the kitchen for a chat about his other job as a pilot (yeah right) then asked if I was interested in fire safety.
I told him he clearly wasn't going to get as far as quoting before the hour was up and asked him to leave. He was spitting feathers. Misogyny doesn't even come close.
As others have said, get a small local place to do it. The product quality will be the same and the fitters are less likely to be sub-sub contractors who dgaf.

It's an awful sales technique and if they get into your house you'll struggle to get them back out again without signing up there & then.

He stayed too long but we signed nothing - and failed to give us a written quote which is what we both said we wanted.

A thousand times no!
S and A are the biggest most notorius in the business. I'm guessing they are paying you for this post.

I would say “Do you want to earn some commission here or not?” “Well talk to me then!”

That's great but I was talking about my experience as a salesperson almost 20 years ago.

Good window companies don't need to go round door to door looking for clients. having had new windows put in last year, my experience is that they are backed up with massive orders and have a loooong waiting list.

I had to wait 3 months for mine and that is after they processed my order as urgent as I had to move for health reasons

so on that basis I would ignore this salesperson. the misogyny is by the by. I just operate on the basis that most men are sexist, that way I don't get disappointed

It's because he wants to do a hard sell. He's not interested in you getting a range of quotes and then choosing the best - he just wants you to sign on the dotted line with him.

I had this and when he said that he would come back later when my husband was home to quote I told him not to bother and that I am more than capable of making household decisions and anyone wanting us both there were only going to do a 'hard sell'. I then shut the door on him.

I had this, name and shame - Safe Style. They then had the cheek to call back and got (then) h who arranged a time. We didn't have them because of this ... i cancelled