DS’s friend damaged toy & hid it

[Snowstorming]

Just looking for advice on how to deal with this situation as I know kids are kids and I don’t want to make any child feel attacked or scared, but I also want to learn from what’s happened today

so my DS8 got a brand new gift today, roughly £18 toy from Smyths. Definitely a one off treat as I am really strapped for cash and can’t afford big treats regularly.

we came home as DS had a play date at our home with some friends. I stupidly left the toy out on the kitchen top. I now realise I should have taken responsibility and packed it away. However, the play date was due to take place in the garden, not home (think of a bunch of young lads just playing in the front garden with some snacks, all live locally like on the same road and same neighbourhood so no need to come inside really as their homes were closeby).

one of DSs friends went inside with my younger DS who is only 5 and convinced DS5 to tell them where some scissors are, then tried to open the new toy. They ended up cutting through the toy’s wiring and it no longer works. It’s never been used, brand new.

i didn’t know about this until DS8 noticed his toy was open on the table and the packaging all over the place, and saw the broken wire. DS5 admitted what happened and was adamant that DS friend cut it and then ran out of the house.

while this was happening, I was supervising outside and clearly missed them going into the house (it was a span of a few minutes as I clearly remember seeing them come outside and reminding them to play outside rather than go inside).

I don’t know what to do next. I will probably see DS8’s friend tomorrow as they live down the road from us and play together regularly although some of his behaviour has put me off previously (eg lying, inappropriate remarks, swearing etc).

should I speak to the child? Should I just consider this a lesson on being more safe and organised in future?

what would you do?

Agreed!

@PixieLaLar I see you've had a post deleted?

Why?

Maybe you should go find a friend or even a hobby, if finding a friend is too difficult with that personality of yours?

you are embarrassing 🤡🤡🤡

I see you have too.

Why?

🙄

Not sure @Azandme I've messaged MN, I just replayed what OP had said.

I'll let you know when I hear back.

Are you implying that OP and I are the same person?

Instead of troll hunting, just report my posts! Im quite happy for MNHQ to clarify.

@itsnotyouagain no I'm not implying that at all! What makes you think I am?

Ah I meant she would be saying to me "not you again" as she has previously, which is close to your username, but I didn't mean your username.

I've reported to MN because this post has descended into a spiteful, venom filled mess. It's not even remotely related to the OP topic at all now.

Thank you for clarifying @Noyesnoyes I appreciate it.

It's sad op came here to talk about a situation yet the post was totally taken over with nonsense. The kids a brat and I'd never let him even in my garden again and I'd tell the parents about the video proof. I'd hope they would pay for the toy.

Yes I’m not sure why grown women feel the need to harass me for a parenting post I made. It’s ridiculous.

Personally? I would 1) Tell the kids’ parents—“I came into the kitchen on x day to see that a gift that I had purchased for a family member was cut out if its box and ruined with a pair of scissors. I was surprised, as all of the neighbourhood kids had been playing in the garden and they had all been asked to stay out of the house. I checked my nanny cam, and it turns out that it was Billy who did this. I’m really upset and disappointed because I now need to replace the gift.” I would personally leave it there, and if the parent is any way decent, they’d offer to pay. (Or you could ask for payment.)
2) Not ever allow this kid in my home.

Op I'm not naming any names but the person derailing your thread is obviously either miserable in their own life or has some sort of mental health issue. I pity them for the way they have embarrassed themselves and hope they get the help they need. And I sure hope you get paid for the toy. Even if you were filthy rich you should be paid for the toy.

This was such a a nice response to read. Thanks OP. 🌷

This thread is pretty nuts but you've done a great job.

Also anyone not understanding why a nanny cam might be there is ridiculous.

The kid made a mistake but so did you .-Yours involved leaving the toy out, a child going into your house long enough to persuade your child where scissors were - retrieve them and cut open the toy and going back out before you noticed. There excuse is they are 8 - your excuse is you were concentrating on the other children.

If my child did it - I would like to know and would offer to replace. If it happened to my child's toy I would not mention it especially as they had time to get scissors and you didn't notice and that could have ended up a lot worse.

Have you tried to fix the wire op?

What is wrong with you people??

How small are your lives that you feel a sense of accomplishment picking apart a story on the smallest of points that have absolutely nothing to do with the OP.

If the op has a genuine problem and you throw a bit of experience and brianpower into helping her.. well done. You have been a decent person.

If the op is lying because she needs some interaction in her life, or she is a malicious troll (and I don't think this is you OP) then don't feed the beast and move on.

Why would you sit there pulling apart this woman's life with irrelevant questions about her religion, her parenting style, her home choices, and her financial situation. Does it give you a much needed "A HA" moment?

Would you really talk to a human being in real life the way you are bullying this woman?
Seriously people.. get a grip..

I agree. This has gone way too far.
Did the OP drip feed about the camera? Yes but that’s it. Honestly she’s been picked apart and accused of lying about the most innocuous thing. I assume if she was going to troll/lie, she’d make it a bit more interesting! 😉

Oh definitely! If I was going to lie I’d probably make up a story about next door’s Johnny throwing a ball at my crystal chandelier and should I approach his Daddy Warbucks for a replacement chandelier or should I see this as a chance to redo my entire home? AIBU xxx

I tried yesterday and it didn’t work unfortunately. It actually looks like I may have even damaged it further (it was already hanging on by a like single wire basically) so I’m chalking it up to a lesson learned.

i spoke to my children again today about the incident, especially my DS5.

i haven’t seen the neighbourhood kid for 2-: days now and i think they’re out somewhere so haven’t had a chance to address it with them yet but thanks to Mumsnet I’ve got some good ideas now!

I agree..
Unfortunately this is how a lot of posts go 🙄,starts off on one subject then all the amateur Miss Marples come along,pick apart an OPs story,look for things that aren't there,make wild accusations,come up with all these theories and make out they know OPs children better than they do..it goes on and on until the thread gets completely derailed and it becomes a bitch fest.

I totally agree with this. I'll be honest even kids scissors can cut wire.

100% child would not be allowed at mine.

If said parent won't replace (we don't know financial situ) I'd replace even if it meant I had to go without.