DS’s friend damaged toy & hid it

[Snowstorming]

Just looking for advice on how to deal with this situation as I know kids are kids and I don’t want to make any child feel attacked or scared, but I also want to learn from what’s happened today

so my DS8 got a brand new gift today, roughly £18 toy from Smyths. Definitely a one off treat as I am really strapped for cash and can’t afford big treats regularly.

we came home as DS had a play date at our home with some friends. I stupidly left the toy out on the kitchen top. I now realise I should have taken responsibility and packed it away. However, the play date was due to take place in the garden, not home (think of a bunch of young lads just playing in the front garden with some snacks, all live locally like on the same road and same neighbourhood so no need to come inside really as their homes were closeby).

one of DSs friends went inside with my younger DS who is only 5 and convinced DS5 to tell them where some scissors are, then tried to open the new toy. They ended up cutting through the toy’s wiring and it no longer works. It’s never been used, brand new.

i didn’t know about this until DS8 noticed his toy was open on the table and the packaging all over the place, and saw the broken wire. DS5 admitted what happened and was adamant that DS friend cut it and then ran out of the house.

while this was happening, I was supervising outside and clearly missed them going into the house (it was a span of a few minutes as I clearly remember seeing them come outside and reminding them to play outside rather than go inside).

I don’t know what to do next. I will probably see DS8’s friend tomorrow as they live down the road from us and play together regularly although some of his behaviour has put me off previously (eg lying, inappropriate remarks, swearing etc).

should I speak to the child? Should I just consider this a lesson on being more safe and organised in future?

what would you do?

Are you going to tell his parents or just leave it?!

Have you spoken to the boys' parents? If it was my child, I'd replace the toy and apologise.

Why did you leave someone else’s child unsupervised in your house for so long? It’s lucky that he only broke the toy - he could have cut himself badly! Those plastic ties are a bugger to cut through!!!
You weren’t supervising very well.

@Azandme ah ok. Thanks for the clarification. Saves me reading the whole thing 😂

If he used the scissors to open the packet and accidentally cut it that’s one story. Or if it’s intentional that’s another. He is only 8. If intentional I would say jealousy or other issues have played into it. I would think he has a few issues going on himself. It’s a fairly cheap toy I wouldn’t bring it up like others have said try and repair. Dont invite him back round in a hurry. Relying on a 5 year old to tell you the story probably isn’t helpful either.

There are some really nasty pricks on this thread.

OP has been picked apart over every detail - blamed for the actions of an 8 year old brat who should know better, questioned on her Religion, her choice of toy for her child, why she has a nanny cam in her own home (she already said about past trauma not that she even needs a bloody reason!) Questioned on choice of wording, accused of favouring DS8 over DS5. Seriously STOP.

My bet would be on the 5yo doing it and blaming the friend. Sibling jealousy at its best

I expect your younger child has told the older boy about the toy, they’ve gone inside together and DS5 has asked the older boy to open the box. What other reason would there be for them to actually go inside if they knew they weren’t allowed?
My 5 year old grandson would 100% do this if he knew there was a new toy to be had!!!

I am a bit sick of posters getting their jollies from being total cunts to an OP. About anything. They will always reliably wake against an OP, whatever the thread, whatever the board.

Are their lives so inadequate that they think writing their version of a ‘gotcha’ post makes them feel clever and superior? It’s a bit tragic.

What a disgusting thing to say and are you honestly that thick to not understand that not being a Christian means you ‘aren’t religious’

Jesus christ whats with All the amateur detectives on this thread?
Shit it happened op it's happened to a toy we were trying to remove from a box tbh we took it back said it was broken and they replaced it l

If youre not willing to raise with the parents then you're just going to have to move on.
Also in terms of the cctv I'd make sure people realise it's inside and not just outside unless your sign makes that clear id never assume it was inside cctv and no id not be happy with that level of monitoring of me or the kids unknowingly

I too would be really annoyed 😒. Tell the parents and don't letvthe boy cone by again...consequences

OP I don't understand why you keep engaging with the batshit MNers. Speak to the parent so they can compensate you and discipline their child.

When my kids were younger I allowed a neighbours kid to play with ours, be in our home etc but he turned out to be unruly (with no discipline) and I had to eventually ban him. Not ideal for anyone but I am not allowing an undisciplined child to damage my property or peace. Once this kid damaged flowers in a communal area. My younger son was with him. I was horrified and made my son write a sorry note for the person whose flowers etc they were. The flower owner said they saw the damage and it was the unruly kid, not my son but I think it instilled a good lesson in my son and I'm pleased I kept him away from a poorly behaved child who could influence him.

I don’t know why everyone is being so weird and aggressive with you about this. An 8 year old should know better, he sounds like a horrible kid and I wouldn’t let him back in my house.

I find most 5 year olds are more than happy to tell on someone unprompted else unless they're involved. In such an open household I'd would have expected him to come and get you. The 5 YO did tell him where the scissors were and then hung around while he cut open the toy, I also wonder how the 8 YO knew about said toy. 5 YO is more involved in this then you want to believe. When was the last time he had a new toy?

You left 5-8 year old children to play unsupervised in your house with scissors? Including a known bully? This is on you, I’m afraid. Something a lot worse than an 18 quid toy being damaged could have happened.

I would tell them and hope that would bethe end if the relationship. Hopefully they don't live very close?

RTWT - she didn't "leave" anyone playing with scissors. 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

The reading comprehension of some people on this thread beggars belief.

What are you going on (and on) about?

Get a hobby. Or a job.

It’s posters like this ^ that make this place the toxic, bullying hell hole everyone thinks it is.

I hate to break it to you, but other religions pray. It's not a "Christian" thing.

Did you miss RE in school or something?

RTWT She has the whole incident on nanny cam.

he wasnt supposed to be in there, she can do what she likes in their own house, he wasnt invited inside.

Hear hear👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿.a lot of kids are allowed to do whatever pops into their heads with zero consequences cos "kidz"

Why do some weirdos people bother to Advance Search a poster on a thread like this , just seems so stalkerish?

If it is a poster saying "my 5 kids did blah, blah, blah" and then on another thread says "I am a single woman with no kids" then ok, I kind of see the point to out a troll. But to bother on a thread like this to out yourself as a stalker by saying that she has posted about "praying for people", is just plain odd.

And even odder that you only think people who call themselves Christians are religious and can pray for people 😂