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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

SIL didn’t get DD an egg bc she’s “too old”

476 replies

Eastereggcheek · 01/04/2024 14:06

SIL has bought my younger DD, 13, an easter egg but not my older DD, 18, because she’s now an adult. I was absolutely furious when I found out! What an absolute cheek! You don’t buy one without the other. I haven’t given younger DD her egg yet as I don’t want my older one to feel left out. I’m going to go to the shops in a bit and get one for older DD and pretend it’s from SIL!

Would you find this inconsiderate? I would never have the nerve to be this spiteful!

OP posts:
MiltonNorthern · 01/04/2024 14:07

I really couldn't get worked up about it. I'm sure your DD can buy herself some chocolate if she wants it!

BoudiccaOfSuburbia · 01/04/2024 14:07

It was a bit mean but you are over reacting.

fieldsofbutterflies · 01/04/2024 14:07

It would never occur to me to buy an adult niece an Easter egg.

GoodnightAdeline · 01/04/2024 14:08

At 18 we no longer received presents or Easter eggs from aunts/uncles as I’m from a huge family and there had to be a cut off somewhere. It’s never crossed my mind to get all worked up about it. I find grown adults who tantrum over presents, Easter eggs and the like to be very childish tbh

LadyMacbethssweetArabianhand · 01/04/2024 14:08

I think she has a point otherwise you have to keep on giving forever. My aunt has a cut off age of 16, so everything stopped when you reached that age. Younger siblings still got gifts. It was her rule and we accepted it

nadine90 · 01/04/2024 14:09

Unless she’s planning to buy them eggs forever, there has to be a cut off and 18 seems like a sensible age to stop.

Bellsandthistle · 01/04/2024 14:10

You were “absolutely furious”?
Is there a relevant backstory here?

BlueMum16 · 01/04/2024 14:10

I have two nephews and nieces over 18 and two under 18. I currently buy all four eggs, birthday and Christmas presents. I do wonder if it stops or do we carry on forever? I do receive from one auntie but none of my others.

Original poster
Eastereggcheek · 01/04/2024 14:10

Do people not think it should stop once younger DD reaches 18 though?

OP posts:
GoodnightAdeline · 01/04/2024 14:10

Bellsandthistle · 01/04/2024 14:10

You were “absolutely furious”?
Is there a relevant backstory here?

I doubt it, some people just have a lot of time on their hands!

Hairyfairy01 · 01/04/2024 14:10

I wouldn't buy my 18 year old niece an egg either. I think 18, or even 16 is a good cut off age for these things. Are you still expecting your elder dd to get an egg at 21 as she has a younger sibling? When does it stop?

Fulshaw · 01/04/2024 14:10

If you don’t stop at 18, when do you stop? Genuine question.

ComtesseDeSpair · 01/04/2024 14:10

Presents stop at 18 in my family, otherwise it all just gets unsustainable. Your elder DD isn’t losing out: she’s presumably had 18 years’ worth of presents from wider family to her younger sister’s 13. If she can’t understand that chocolate eggs are mostly aimed at children (and that she could buy her own if she wanted one) then she’s a bit petulant.

toastofthetown · 01/04/2024 14:10

Maybe your SIL wants to stop Easter gift giving to adults, which is fair enough, though it would have been better communicated in advance. I stopped receiving Christmas and birthday presents from aunts and uncles at 18/21. My younger siblings got presents until they were at the cutoff age, which was never a problem with me.

Surely your SIL will find it odd to be thanked for gift she didn’t give. Do your children not thank their aunt for their Easter gifts?

Gowlett · 01/04/2024 14:10

Absolutely furious? Kinell…

Newuser75 · 01/04/2024 14:11

Eastereggcheek · 01/04/2024 14:10

Do people not think it should stop once younger DD reaches 18 though?

No, I'd say stop when they each get to 18. That would seem reasonable to me. Otherwise the older one is having a good few years of presents more than the younger one.

Fulshaw · 01/04/2024 14:11

Eastereggcheek · 01/04/2024 14:10

Do people not think it should stop once younger DD reaches 18 though?

No, because then the older one has had five more years of eggs than the younger one.

StarbucksQueen1 · 01/04/2024 14:11

Eastereggcheek · 01/04/2024 14:10

Do people not think it should stop once younger DD reaches 18 though?

Yes! Dramatic over reaction.

Notfeelinghunkydory · 01/04/2024 14:12

This is so pathetic.

Hairyfairy01 · 01/04/2024 14:12

Eastereggcheek · 01/04/2024 14:10

Do people not think it should stop once younger DD reaches 18 though?

No. I would in-fact argue that this is unfair to your younger dd as your older dd will have received more over the years.

BernardsarenotalwaysSaints · 01/04/2024 14:12

Eastereggcheek · 01/04/2024 14:10

Do people not think it should stop once younger DD reaches 18 though?

No because that's not how having a cut off at a certain age works.

InTheRainOnATrain · 01/04/2024 14:12

18 is an adult so I get why she might see it as a cut off, and it’s just a bit of chocolate. Absolutely furious and thinking it’s spiteful is a massive overreaction!! Unless it’s a typo and the kids are actually 3 and 8?!

LeafRed · 01/04/2024 14:12

We still buy an egg for both our children, they are 21 and 18. I wouldn't buy for one without the other, that goes for anyone else's children I would buy for too. I don't see why Easter eggs are only for children. Fuck that. Both Dh and I got an egg too.

Mummame2222 · 01/04/2024 14:12

What the fuck 😂😂😂😂😂

sunshineandshowers40 · 01/04/2024 14:12

I think you are over reacting. Your older DD is an adult. I would have bought her one as Easter Eggs aren't really expensive but lots of families have 18/21 as a cut off point for gifts.

You could argue that if she stopped when youngest was 18, your older DD would have had more gifts over the years (is that fair?).