SIL didn’t get DD an egg bc she’s “too old”

[Eastereggcheek]

SIL has bought my younger DD, 13, an easter egg but not my older DD, 18, because she’s now an adult. I was absolutely furious when I found out! What an absolute cheek! You don’t buy one without the other. I haven’t given younger DD her egg yet as I don’t want my older one to feel left out. I’m going to go to the shops in a bit and get one for older DD and pretend it’s from SIL!

Would you find this inconsiderate? I would never have the nerve to be this spiteful!

Unfair and mean-spirited OP. Eggs cost a couple of pounds so I wouldn’t apply a cut off age unless she is really hard up.

whoever says she should buy her own chocolate is missing the emotional aspects of gifting.

I really don’t understand why it’s wrong to buy adults Easter Eggs . We are talking about £2-5 per eggs and with all the deals even cheaper.
I got my niece and nephew an egg , my sister has bought my adult children eggs and BIL got me an egg and I am 60 !
So yes ,I would be puzzled if my older children were left out and younger one had been given one ,but not furious and my children wouldn’t be sobbing over it .

You do realise that £5 is a lot of money to some people? Or do you assume that everyone is equally as well of as you?

Because, guess what they're not!

To be honest this view is bonkers to me, it can easily be explained that it was fairer to do it this way where one person got them longer than the other to ensure one person wasn’t left out every year.. if an 18 year old doesn’t understand that then they’re a twat.

we’re talking 5 extra Easter eggs rather than one person feeling left out every year for 5 years.. it’s not really comparable??

We've always stopped this sort of stuff at 18 in my family (not eggs specifically as extended family never buy Easter eggs but presents generally). 18 year olds are old enough to understand it. And why is that unfair but doing it until the youngest is 18 isn't? Your way the oldest child gets a lot more overall, as they get it for 18+ years.

I would certainly never be furious over it, or consider it a "spiteful" thing to do. It's not spiteful, it's just a different way of doing it. Families do things in different ways. Now you know your SIL stops things like this at 18.

I'd feel a bit of a twat getting an egg from my aunty at 18. I'd already been working full time for two years and paying my way. I'd be embarrassed I hadn't reciprocated and got her one. I certainly wouldn't have been remotely upset.
I'd be baffled if my sister was furious over the lack of egg for an 18 year old. Where's the cut off if not 18? Fair enough if you want to buy her one -I buy my 18 year old one. I wouldn't expect others to do so.

This has to be a wind up. And if its not, teach your 18 year old some basic understanding of being an adult instead of running out and buying her a replacement!

We stop once they turn 18, will still buy for younger siblings till they turn 18.

Needs to stop somewhere, at 18 I imagine most will have a job or means of their own money so can buy what they want anyway!

I really don’t understand why it’s wrong to buy adults Easter Eggs .

It's not. But it's not wrong to not buy them either.

I would imagine that OP's now adult child doesn't buy her aunt an Easter egg (just a guess of course, I could be wrong). Why would an adult expect a gift from someone they don't buy gifts for?

I think it’s really normal to stop giving eggs once children become adults. I’m sure your 18 year old will cope fine with seeing her little sister get an egg and will understand that when little sister is 18, they’ll stop for her too. If she doesn’t understand this then you have more issues than Easter eggs…

I am guessing this is an April Fool but on the off-chance it isn't that just makes it unfair kn the younger in that she gets 5 less than her sibling 🙄🤣

I really don’t understand why it’s wrong to buy adults Easter Eggs . We are talking about £2-5 per eggs and with all the deals even cheaper.

There's nothing wrong with it. It's just some families choose to buy for children only. Adults often don't like cheap chocolate like Cadbury, or even if they do, it can quickly add up. Could the young adult afford to buy for parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, siblings? If I had an egg from every other adult in my family that would be far too much too.

Hold on, so she buys for them both until your younger daughter is 18 (as per one of your previous comments) then your elder daughter got 23 Easter eggs of auntie over her lifetime and younger only got 18 😂 that would be your next complaint!

You can get Cadbury eggs for about £2 in the run up to Easter. £5 was the generous example I gave! 🤦‍♀️

It's just a chocolate egg.

'furious'? You round unhinged. Not a normal reaction for an adult child missing out on an Easter egg.

Another thread to wind up the Mumsnetters!

I think your reaction is a little OTT.

Having said that, I buy candy for anyone spending Easter with me. We don't do nice big Easter eggs here, but I bought jelly beans and mini eggs, plus a couple of creme eggs. It was all dumped into a bowl on the coffee table. I had one DD, aged 22, home for Easter. If I didn't buy anything and she fancied some chocolate, she'd buy her own.

Everyone here is assuming SIL has been around for all of OP's DC's lives.

Say she married into the family when the OP's kids rather than 13 and 18 were 11 and 16, the older kid only got eggs for two years and the younger kid has had eggs for three years.

This is terribly unfair, and the OP's younger child must immediately give me tis year's egg to eat for justice. That way, both children are treated the exact same.

For some parents we’re not much more than cash cows.

18 seems like a reasonable age to stop. If she carries on till the youngest dd is 18 then the oldest will be 23 and you will be moaning that she should carry on till 23 for the younger one. I think most of my relatives moved from gifts to cards when I was around 18. I think you are totally unreasonable to be so cross about it to be honest.

I think the OP should split the egg between the two… maybe would need to brush up on fractions depending on when the SIL came into the picture. Although it may be easier to melt it down then weigh out the shares so they are proportionate to the amount of time SIL has been in the picture.

Does the clock start from the first date, first egg, wedding? What if there was an extra birthday present? Does that get deducted from the egg share?

My grandchildren, 15 & 18, were here for Easter and both were given a chocolate egg. I would never have thought not to give GS18 an egg - mind you I also gave one to their dad, my son, aged 46!

I know at 18 he's an adult, but still...

Why assume she married in, rather than being OP's DP's sister? If she married in, why isn't her husband (who would be OP's brother), getting some criticism from OP. I'm assuming they wouldn't be buying Easter eggs separately.

We never brought Easter eggs in our family for anyone other than our own kids and sometimes grandkids. However presents for children from aunts and uncles normally stopped at 18.
Presumably your sister in law assumes similar in which case if you pretend now then what happens at Christmas/dd next birthday when she doesn't get a present from her auntie but her sister does? Are you going to pretend then too?
Best to just explain to DD that now she is an adult she probably won't receive presents from her aunt/uncle.