To doubt he's actually 'sick' again in time for our Easter plans?

[Celia24]

I've been seeing my boyfriend for 4 months but meetings haven't been as frequent as I'd like because he was finishing a PhD. Sometimes we'd skip a weekend because he'd need to keep his head down.

Another weekend he was sick so we rescheduled. We've seen each other more lately although last weekend the night before we were due to meet he said he had a migraine. He didn't cancel although I half expected him to.

We then planned to meet at Easter because neither of us could meet last weekend (both on trips with friends/family).

When I broached the subject of our plans this weekend, he said he was ill and didn't want to pass it to me but would see how he feels and let me know. Yet before I mentioned our plans he was sending daily photos of nights out and walks he was on every day, with no mention of illness. I feel paranoid which isn't me at all!

I have the whole weekend off and feel sad that I'll 1) I might not see him and 2) be alone the whole time because I turned down other plans.

😂 My DH got an extension to his because their Supervisor wanted them to do some extra research. So our DC was born to a PhD student... Luckily he'd nearly finished by then but he went from being exhausted with no time to exhausted with no spare time.

Not in any way similar to op.

I don’t think this is the relationship you think it is, OP.

You say you’re ‘young’. How old? And how old is this formerly married solitary PhD student?

I'd dump him for being a sick note.

Did you see him today and get things sorted out OP?

So did you meet him at the weekend OP or did he make yet another excuse?

You don't owe us an update, @Celia24 - but curious minds would like to know how it went...

Hey @minniefresh and @PaminaMozart a positive update I think.

We had a great day on Sunday and then he stayed over and went home Monday. And guess what? He said 'i was thinking it would be nice to see each other more often if you're up for it?'

This weekend he says he needs to keep working on his PhD but for the first time ever has suggested doing this at my home and then we can go out in the evening. I definitely feel happier and more secure that he's invested in spending time with me now.

@Celia24 well done, glad you got what you were looking for 😊

Aw, that’s lovely to hear. Wishing you both all the best moving forward.

Thank you for the update. I was a bit overly invested and I was hoping you hadnt been let down again over Easter. I wish you happiness going forward. x

So glad to hear you had a lovely time OP. I’m glad you gave him a chance. He may very well be the type to always have a project on the go. Not everyone stops at 6 on a Friday eve and spends the weekend watching the football / tv or down at the pub, and something tells me he’s the project oriented type. When the phd is five it will probably be a book! But it’s just a case of deciding what works for you.

I didn't mention it before @Calliopespa but I'm a writer and the one writing the books so far!

I'll be working on that tomorrow while he's working on the PhD and then we're off out in the evening. It's easy to jump to LTB but in this case it required some communication. Definitely happy to stick with it and see how things develop 🙂

Well that’s it: horses for courses and courses for horses ( not calling anyone a horse!) .

Some people’s boring nerd is another person’s interesting soul mate.