Night out drama - old boss

[Geordielass35]

I've been on a hen night in Belfast. It's been a great weekend and people have been so friendly. Been drinking and dancing, went to the Titanic museum as well.

My old boss is on the hen night. She was a bitch at times when I worked with her and was very judgemental of others, including me, when I worked for her.

Anyway tonight she has clearly cheated on her husband. I saw her leave the bar with a man now I can hear her in the next room and she's not alone...

I know people that know both of them. Do I say something or just keep it quiet, since it's none of my business. I'm desperate to tell people and it's wrong what she did, but is it my business to mention it?! I'm torn on it. Reasonable or not reasonable to tell the people close to her husband?

No, keep your mouth shut. It’s not your business.

Agree keep your mouth shut OP stay out of it x

@imgonnalooseit thanks. I'll just say nothing. One of the others might spill it if they noticed. For once I am relatively sober and sensible!

It would depend just how much she had missed me off in the past, but I think I'd be more likely to just smirk at her in the morning and get in a couple of digs about it. Something like "oh you don't half make a lot of noise when you...... get ready for bed" or "did you have trouble sleeping, you were tossing........ and turning all night"
Just so she knows you know.
But I can be spiteful when riled! I would take pleasure in knowing she now has to wait and see what I might do. I wouldn't have to do anything else, her guilt can just fester away at her.

I also think you'd be getting different responses if it was a man playing away rather than a woman.

Agree keep quiet it would be easy for her to make out you’re lying if no one else saw and drive a wedge between you and the rest of the group, especially if it sounds like she has form for treating people unfairly. People can be vicious when they are in the wrong and I could see this blowing up in your face.

Agree with PP I would possibly greet her tomorrow with a raised brow but keep my mouth shut.

@RunningAwayToJoinTheCircus she did piss me off a lot in the past. Used to make comments to me. I don't know how many of the others on this hen night will when know because of the states people were in. Good advice, I'll mention something like that so she knows I know. Then I'll go no further than that!

If you do I would favour a bland response if anyone asks if you slept well. “Not really, it was quite noisy, the hotel walls are quite thin.”

Oooh do update us on what happens …!! 😂

@jolies1 Thanks yes a comment like that will be sufficient. Its bloody true as well unfortunately. If he's not gone early or she misses breakfast I think it'll be obvious to the rest of the group what's happened.

I will tomorrow. Just pleased I won't be ridiculously hungover for my journey home.

Well she hasn't appeared at Breakfast. I heard a few of the others wonder where she was. I didn't say anything, really had to bite my tongue! I think they're assuming she's just hungover. I found out the girl who was in the room on the other side of her didn't come back to the hotel, so she'll be non the wiser as well.

It's been a great trip where everyone has got along. I don't want any trouble so I'll stay quiet! Her poor husband though. And I could have done with an hour or two more sleep!

If she had treated me like crap being a boss I would take great pleasure in letting people know what the dirty cheating bitch was up to and if I was her husband I would sure as hell want to know he has the right to know it’s always the same everyone else always knows before the partner I’m speaking from experience do the right thing let her husband know what a BITCH don’t feel guilty girl do it

All these people saying keep quite would you want someone to stay quiet if it was your partner cheating ummm don’t think so

Absolutely!

I'd tell everybody. I can't bear cheaters.

Tell her husband later if you want to but I wouldn't start gossiping if it's been a nice trip. She will probably deny it and you don't want things to end on a sour note for the bride. Plus nobody will want to get involved in a marriage with second hand information so it's unlikely to come to anything constructive

Oh I’d snitch on her so fast!!!

Admittedly probably not AT the weekend, if it affected other people, but afterwards I’d certainly say something. 😏

I would tell him absolutely. Wouldn't matter if she hadn't been a bitch, if my partner cheated I hope someone would have the guts to tell me.

Raise your bar - if my partner went to another woman's house in the situation you described that's as good as cheating in my book.

its not your business to get involved in other peoples relationships

if you knew them well as a couple maybe talk to her and have a discussion around why she should tell him but you don’t have that relationship

if you want to gossip about what you saw and hear to feel you are getting your own back is one thing to act as the moral police is quite another

@JustPombear She isn't my friend. If it was my friend I would have tried to intervene. Though we were all having a good time and there was a big group of us. She certainly shagged him, was very loud. The walls were paper thin.

I wish there was no drama for her husband's sake.

@Catlord that's the thing the bride has seemed really happy and she's a lovely person who deserves no hassle on her weekend. And yea she'll likely deny it

She'd probably blame OP for whatever your partner did in this scenario too.