A word of warning to mums

[BlondiesHaveMoreFun]

They leave you. I had many years of bliss with my babies. And they are doing SO well. But they bugger off! My Daughter is in Australia and my son is in America. This isn’t how I thought my life would pan out.

😭😭

Thats A post about adult children, how are you?. Their independence is a good sign surely?

My mother used to say that your children are only on loan to you.

They're adults. Did you stay with your mother?

Great, I might have some time to myself again at some point in the future.

Can't get rid of mine lol

Op hope you get to visit them, don't know how I would feel about it.

God, I hope mine does.

Not because I want him to go of course, but I want him to make the most of his life, see the world.

I have lived in the same place all my life, had DS when I was 18, haven't done anything in life apart from parent. I hope DS has some adventures.

How awful for you. I know you're happy for them but I bet it's lonely without them. You build your whole life around them and expect them to stay with you but they grow up and move on its sad. Could you move close to one of them. Obviously the one you like the most 😜xx

I wish mine would fuck off. 15 years not one single weekend off. I can't go out
I can't date
Its shit
This isn't how imagined spending my 50s.
See the grass isn't always greener.?..

Celebrate their independence!

I have a 16-year-old who will never be able to live independently..............I wish he could.

You've done your job right, raised confident adults who aren't afraid to go off an explore the world and chase their dreams.

As pp said the grass really isn't always greener.

Isn’t that the whole point of parenthood? To raise them not to need you, to spread their wings? DS is only 11, but I fully expect him to explore the world. I’ve spent most of my adult life outside my home country, so it would be strange not to think he’ll do the same — why would he restrict himself to one place? He’d already lived in three places in two countries by the time he was seven. I’d be appalled if he tied himself down because of where his parents lived!

It's very bittersweet as they get older and gradually break away from you. DS is 18 and although we are close and get on well, each year I feel him break away from me a little more. It's as it should be and I am so proud of him, but it is a little heart breaking too.

I understand OP.

You want them to spread their wings but you miss them too.

I also have children on other continents - video calling is a wonderful thing, and I have new places I can visit!

My 20 year old is getting married in August and moving to Germany to live with his wife.

I can relate.

A colleague of mine whilst talking about her children becoming adults said "oh well, it was good while it lasted" Brought a tear to my eye.

I’m preparing myself, as my 15yr old is hellbent on going to the US after uni. Can’t say I’m looking forward to it, but I’d be slightly pleased for her living her dream 🤷🏽‍♀️.

That’s exactly how it should be.

Children should enhance your life, not dominate it.

They leave us incrementally, that’s the point positive risk taking & independence to raise confident YA

My DS is nearly 5 and this actually makes me want to cry , I know it’s a while off yet but …. 🥹

My dc are v young but of course they’ll leave that’s the point. To foster independence and positive risk taking

My aunt's children and grandchildren are settled in other countries and she misses them so much.

My children are still of an age where I can kiss and cuddle them and sniff the little one's head.

I hope they become successful people with brilliant lives, preferably within 30 mins drive of my retirement bungalow!

I feel for you OP

I want my children to be independent adults, living their best life etc..... but nearby

I'd be v upset if they moved away, but of course wouldn't feel I could say so, as that seems taboo. And I wonder why that's perceived as a bad thing? Lots of research about benefits of strong family relationships, and yet we're expected to actively celebrate our children moving away / overseas

This makes me feel sad and panicky..my Dd is only 5 😢