Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My DH has changed my baby’s name….

549 replies

Lilysienna1 · 15/03/2024 21:52

… or at least, he’s TOLD everyone a different name. I’m pretty sure I am not being unreasonable. This is more of what would be a reasonable response. Because right now I’m ready to LTB.

I have recently given birth to our 3rd and final baby. I had a difficult birth, and have just got home from hospital after a 10 day stay.
As we did with previous births, we’ve not allowed any visitors and as I’ve been so unwell, I’ve actually only bothered with my
phone to snap a few photos, in between sleeping and feeding etc. Not announced the birth on social media, and only spoke with my mum and sisters.

I arrive home today and started opening cards and presents that family and friends (from DH side) have dropped round. All with congratulations on the birth of ‘Georgina.’

This would be lovely, if her name was Georgina. However, it isn’t or at least it wasn’t. We had agreed on Emmeline. Georgina was a top contender, but I just didn’t love it as much as Emmeline. DH had not expressed how much he loved the name Georgina - he was very much ‘I like all the names on the shortlist. You can choose.’ Which I did. Emmeline.

so of course, I confront him on it. We didn’t share any names with friends and family, so I knew they hadn’t just taken a wild guess. He looked a bit sheepish and said ‘I was going to tell you. I just don’t think I can imagine calling her Emmeline. Georgina is a better fit.’
Oh and ‘Everyone agrees’ he said. (his mum then basically)

‘I was going to tell you’ doesn’t really cut it here does it? I will admit neither of us were really using her name in the hospital, we were calling her ‘little bean’ which was a silly but sentimental name we had for her when she was just a bump. But of course I’ve said Emmeline a few times and I’m sure he has as well.

He said he was really sorry, but ‘everyone’ was asking for a name and he felt he had to make a decision (that we had already made) and so he ‘went with Georgina.’
He says he can understand why I am upset but as we both like Georgina, why can’t we use it. Seeing as she doesn’t ‘feel like an Emmeline.’

if this had been discussed, then sure, we both have to feel comfortable with the end name, but that decision can’t be with one parent alone, behind the other ones back. He says I was too unwell to really decide. Yes, I was unwell. But perfectly capable of a conversation.

oh and his mum has already ordered ‘Georgina’ a personalised baby blanket 🥴

OP posts:
cherish123 · 15/03/2024 21:55

I would be annoyed too. It's also a very odd thing for him to do.

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 15/03/2024 21:55

I'd register the birth myself asap and put out a group chat message correcting everyone and apologising for the confusion

Thementalloadisreal · 15/03/2024 21:56

Omg I’d be fuming. What a dick move.

Well you’re going to have to come up with a new name.
and get him to text everyone he’s told and apologise that HE got the name wrong

PumpkinPie2016 · 15/03/2024 21:57

Oh goodness, I would be fuming!

He shouldn't have changed the agreed name without discussing with you first!! You should both get a say and come to an agreement.

Obviously you need to now decide which name you want to give your daughter- if Emmeline is what is decided, he needs to ring round everyone he told and explain the mistake.

Pipecleanerrevival · 15/03/2024 21:57

What an asshole. I’d change his name to Richard until he sorts this out.

rachelvbwho · 15/03/2024 21:58

I 100% would not now bow to his rediculousness and go with Georgina. It would be either Emmeline or another name all together and HE needs to contact people to fix this.

DefenestratingZebra · 15/03/2024 21:58

You know as you're married he can register the name without you? Get thee to the registry office, now!

watermelonsugar56 · 15/03/2024 21:58

Yup what above poster has just said. What he’s done is mad!

Emmeline is such a lovely name by the way (no hate to Georgina it’s lovely but I think Emmeline is very unique). Congratulations ❤️😘

Throwawayme · 15/03/2024 21:58

This is outrageous and I'd be furious. Agree with pp. Register her name yourself asap and have him text those he told me his mistake

GHSP · 15/03/2024 21:58

Congratulations. When you register little Emmeline Georgina you have the last word. I’m sure she’ll treasure the items with her middle name on that her grandparents give her. 😀

benjoin · 15/03/2024 21:58

Fucking hell.

The baby's name can't be Georgina now. It's tainted. You won't ever forget this if that's her name.

Pick another one. Leave a message in the group family chat or whatever and say you've no idea why he's told everyone it's Georgina as you haven't decided yet

DisforDarkChocolate · 15/03/2024 21:58

Now's your chance to use social media and show him how much of a twat he's been.

He can say he's not keen on Emmeline (gorgeous name by the way), but he doesn't get to pick another name while you're unwell and hide it from you. As I said, twat!

CommentNow · 15/03/2024 21:59

Odd. I dont think I could have Georgina now on principle.

You'll probably he the one at home with her the most so whatever you call her will stick.

benjoin · 15/03/2024 21:59

Throwawayme · 15/03/2024 21:58

This is outrageous and I'd be furious. Agree with pp. Register her name yourself asap and have him text those he told me his mistake

Has he registered it OP?

Shiningout · 15/03/2024 22:00

I have never heard of this happening, ever!! It's bonkers!

SecondHandFurniture · 15/03/2024 22:00

Of course you can't use Georgina; every time it comes out of someone's mouth you'll go "Oh yes, my husband was a selfish prick and took advantage of my illness after a difficult birth."

It's Emmeline or something else and he can tell everyone what he did.

Alargeoneplease89 · 15/03/2024 22:01

If you aren't keeping Georgina, keep all the cards / blanket as a funny story for when she's older and she will say one of two things

  • omg I prefer that name or
  • thank you mum
Herdingcatz · 15/03/2024 22:01

Tell him to put this right. He has once chance to do the right thing. What a prick

ChangeIing · 15/03/2024 22:02

NC as outing.

My dad did this. He also registered me under his chosen name.

My mother didn’t find out until I was a week old.

I’m guessing that your husband, like my father, is controlling in a lot of ways?

Zippedydoodahday · 15/03/2024 22:02

Does he have form for being so controlling of you?

DrJoanAllenby · 15/03/2024 22:02

Seeing as how he said he didn't mind which name beforehand I bet he told his mum it was Emmeline and she didn't like it and asked what other names and he said Georgina and she seized on that and said she preferred it!

He's too much of a wimp to stand up to his mother and to admit it to you.

Crooklodge · 15/03/2024 22:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

QueenOfTheEntireFuckingUniverse · 15/03/2024 22:03

What a prick. I'd be fuming.

I love the name Emmeline. It would be a top contender If I had a DD.

Precipice · 15/03/2024 22:04

Have you registered the child's birth yet?

if this had been discussed, then sure, we both have to feel comfortable with the end name, but that decision can’t be with one parent alone, behind the other ones back. He says I was too unwell to really decide. Yes, I was unwell. But perfectly capable of a conversation. It sounds like you settled on Emmeline before the birth. When supposedly were you 'too unwell' to decide?

He says he can understand why I am upset but as we both like Georgina, why can’t we use it. So he doesn't understand why you're upset, since he still thinks he can keep the opportunity to surreptitiously get his own way by manipulating you and the situation.

ThereIsATInWater · 15/03/2024 22:04

Shiningout · 15/03/2024 22:00

I have never heard of this happening, ever!! It's bonkers!

A friends husband did it with her daughter....should have been Robyn, husband registered as Tara!

She had a really traumatic delivery, she wasn't with it.
Back in the days when a registrar came to the hospital.

Swipe left for the next trending thread