Upset about Mothers Day card

[Strawberry06]

Before I start I probably am being unreasonable but I can't help the way I feel.

Today is my first ever Mother's Day and my husband usually gets me a nice card for other occasions and writes a personal message inside.

Anyway for some reason he decided to go down the moonpig route and he made me a personalised card using a photo of me and the baby. In said photo I look horrendous, I've had no sleep, no make up on, not even brushed hair and the card is the whole photo. I couldn't help but cringe when I opened it and then burst out crying. Then there's just the most basic line of text inside.

I know I probably sound so ungrateful and there are much more important things but all I wanted was just a normal cute mummy card with a handwritten message inside for my first Mother's Day and I can't help but think he's ruined it and I'm so upset about it.

He knows the cards are important to me I don't ask for or expect anything else but a nice card I don't feel like it's a lot to ask!

YABU. The card is on behalf of your baby, so should say ‘Happy Mother’s Day love from Baby Jack’. A heartfelt message from DH would be weird.

However given your baby is only 2 weeks old you get a free pass for pretty much any thing. Congratulations!

Its so patronising to say she'll love it in 20 years time, she may well not

so it's a photo of a newborn baby, and the baby's mother - you !
that's why your hair is unbrushed and you look tired.
the baby is a NEWBORN !!!

YABU - he tried to do something nice & you’ve thrown it in his face. He must think you look ok in the photo and anyway, Mother’s Day isn’t about looks!

@HalfMyFault

how is it then?

The fact that your husband chose that picture means that he didn’t see all the negative things you saw, he saw you and your baby looking lovely. He did his best, don’t sweat the small stuff.

To have got a moonpig card means he actually thought about this a few days ago, that’s quite impressive. I had to remind one of my brothers that our mum also needed acknowledgment today, but to be fair, at least he remembered my SIL!

Unreasonable and ungrateful

You are being completely unreasonable. You burst out crying?! Your poor husband

It's not, but when you have a new born, you sometimes just don't have time!

Woman cries and its the husband you pity?

That even if you really want to do something, it doesn’t always go to plan. Saying where there’s a will there’s a way is complete bollocks some days, many days depending on the needs of the baby.

Do you have children? How old are they?

This is good advice

Totally unreasonable. Your poor husband.

He got you a personalised card. If it’s your first Mother’s Day it’s not like your child could draw or make you one… I think he did well personally!

My daughter has amazing taste and I git an awful moonpig card from her with a blurry photo of me and my grandson. Moonpig are awful, awful cards but until you've ordered one you don't know how awful they are.

Why does he have to get any card for OP? She’s not his mum.
Given he did his crimes don’t seem excessive.

A lot of people seem to think I'd have preferred to be 'made up' in the picture on the card. That is not the issue. I've got 100s pictures where I've got no make up on etc and I love them. Even the photo of us when he was born (I had a c-section) and I had a terrible headache/was all flushed. It's terrible of me but I still love it cause it's the moment he was born. Doesn't mean I want it on the front of a card though.

The point is I wasn't bothered about ANY photo of me being on the front of a card. It was more what was written inside (like what he normally does) on behalf of our son cause he knows how hard it's been for me. Even if there had been an element of design gone into the card and the photo smaller with some other things on the front I might not have reacted as bad but it just looks so slap dash and just 'happy Mother's Day' written inside. Compared to what he normally writes it was just a shock.

Yes I am tired and probably highly hormonal. I just wanted today to be special in the form of a nice card but more fool me for setting my expectations so high. I'm just trying to get over it really cause there are more important things.

I think YABU sorry. My DH doesn't get me a card as he says I'm not his mum. He has always got one from dd though but I do think you're overreacting

That wasn't addressed to me, but yes. In this instance very much so.

I totally feel your pain op. I love a card. I send birthday cards, Christmas cards, thank you cards etc. If i ever make a photo card i NEVER have the website write it. As you say, it's so much more personal getting a handwritten message. Your husband could have done better.

Re the photo, dont throw the card away, maybe in 10 years time you will like the photo a little more even if just because its a memory of this time rather than the actual picture itself. Tuck it in a box somewhere and enjoy the rest of the day.

Congratulations on your little family.

Don't be hard on yourself. You likely will look back on this and laugh, but right now you're hormonal, tired and emotional.

Because he was partly responsible for making her a mum, and the child is too young to do it themselves. Good dads/partners do it.

Of course you know this and you’re as goady as everyone other person who had typed those faux naive words over the last week or so. You just look stupid.

Doesn't everyone look horrific in every photo during the first year of motherhood? I know I did!

Mine are all nearly grown up and I still look horrific!😂😂😂

You burst into tears op, really? 😂 is it that bad, some people have really problems lol. Are you sleep deprived / having a bit of a rough time? Because your reaction does seem rather over the top

I was given a step mum card 😂😂 I’m a lone parents of small children my mum must not of read it 😂 I just laughed greatful at the thought