To veto DH taking baby out on push bike?!

[Amidying]

We have a 19 month old son. DH has got it in his head that at some point in the future, he is going to take DS out on his push bike with one of those seats that go on the back of a bike! Now he hasn’t specified what age DS would be but it would be pre-school age by the sound of it. I have said no way will I allow it as it’s not safe. This is not an essential mode of transport either, so I totally understand that for some people there is no choice but to travel this way with their child, but we have 2 cars! This would be to ride a short distance on the road to our local park or beach which is about 10 mins, but I still can’t get onboard with the idea.

I said to him: We have just spent £300 getting the safest car seat we could afford and you want to take him out on a push bike before he can even ride a bike himself?! He reckons I am being the overprotective mother and it will teach him road safety and help him learn how to ride a bike responsibly. I reckon he is insane and we are at a standoff.

His argument is that his dad did it with him when he was little and it’s one of his earliest happy memories, which is all lovely but we have come a long way safety wise since then. When I was a kid people used to smoke next to me, car seats weren’t a thing, my cousins and me used to pile into car with some of us in the footwells! So where does it end? We have to move with the times surely?! I would prefer to teach DS to ride when the time comes and when he reaches the right age he can do a road safety awareness course or something, I dunno. I hadn’t really thought about it because for me it’s way off into the future!

UABU= chill sista, let them ride
UANBU= its insane and unsafe

I took all my kids out on my bike from being younger babies than yours .
do you not truest your husband ?

Sorry I think YABU. It’s good to get children enjoying the outdoors and getting some exercise (even if it’s just Dad getting the exercise at first!) I often used to take mine to school in one of those chariots attached to the back of my bike. I know some people think those are very dangerous but we were on quiet residential roads and the kids had a great time. School was less than a mile away so driving would have been ridiculous but walking sometimes took ages with a 4 and 6 year-old.

Certainly did this with ours...

I'd allow it on cycle tracks but not on the road. People drive like wankers around cyclists.

My daughters loved doing this. YABU to use a car when a 10 minute cycle is possible. Stick some high vis stickers on the back of the baby seat, make sure DS has a good helmet, and wave them off.

Ahh let them go op DS will probably love it

I love taking DC out on the bike, but luckily live by canal paths and other off road places. Like above, I'm conscious of drivers being prats. Are the streets quiet residential ones or quite busy?

I mean, this is quite a normal thing to do, no? 🤔

It’s not that I don’t trust him, it’s more that accidents happen I guess.

You’re being overprotective. We had a seat like this from when DS was 9 months old. He loved it https://www.balfesbikes.co.uk/accessories/child-seats/hamax-kiss-rear-frame-mount-childseat-in-black-and-red__10538?currency=GBP&chosenAttribute=HAMKISSB&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiA_5WvBhBAEiwAZtCU7xVxVLm8NAs99s2bo31eXS7GMBncXNc8paza3opuBPXBqcgHy0A0NhoCs3cQAvD_BwE

We would have family bike rides along cycle paths to a park and he loved chatting to us.

Assuming the roads are quiet / residential type roads and your DH is sensible and a competent and confident cyclist I would be fine with this, from younger than preschool age too.

Wow OP! YADBU

Would you suggest driving everywhere until your child has road safety skills? A 10 minute cycle to the beach, loads of fresh air, fun, exercise for your DH etc, is a fantastic way to introduce your son to life outside of a car.

Make sure your son has a decent helmet, and a high vis jacket, and ask your DH to take the quieter roads. To insist on a car for this journey is absolutely bonkers.

I don't cycle, but DD was in a seat on DH's bike from pretty small. Our city is packed with kids on cargo bikes, it's just totally everyday

Your son is probably more likely to have an accident in the playground that you're cycling to. Would you ban those as well?

See, I would have less of an issue with those trailer type things because if the bike goes over the trailer stays upright and at least it’s a bit of a barrier between baby and road

YABU obviously

This is exactly my thought on the matter! I am a city girl though and we have now moved to a seaside town so my views are probably very different from people that live here.

Are you me? 🤣 I've been having the exact same conversation with my husband. We do live in a city where there's been a number of cyclists killed in the last few years and literally the other week I saw a cyclist go over the roof of a car after being hit! If it was on really quiet residential roads or cycle paths (that are separate to the roads) out of the city to the park I would probably be more relaxed but I would definitely want to be there as well but I'm maybe a bit of a control freak!

Accidents do happen. but you can't prevent them... I remember the day when my friend gave my son a lift home and had a car accident, while I cycled home w my 2 younger ones on my bike, unscathed. (Kids in car were also unscathed tho shaken; car not so lucky).

Toddler on a bike seat is a completely normal, everyday thing. Get them a good helmet (giro make very small ones), put high vis stickers on the back of the seat and make sure the bike has lights working for gloomy days. He’ll love it! Accidents can happen anywhere; I think most of them actually happen in the home. You can’t live life thinking like that, you’ll drive yourself mad.

Yabu. Your child is a toddler not a baby and I'm sure Daddy will be very careful.

DH transported DD to nursery from 9months -4years on a bike seat, it was about a 15 minute ride and she loved it.

As long as you get a suitable seat and it's properly fitted and regularly checked it's fine.

My husband got ours a top tube seat, so that went in front of him. Kids loved it. He also used to put them in the basket of his big trade bike 😂 he would only ride on cycle paths though, not on road, we are quite fortunate with paths round here!

I loved transporting my kids this way when they were little. Always with helmets and hi viz, and only ever on quiet roads. For short journeys, why do you need to use a car if there's a quiet cycle route?

Well yes, I was going to say until he can ride his own bike we will have to walk to the park/beach or drive him there. I can see from a lot of posters that it’s quite a common thing to do. I grew up in a big city and from a poor background where you just wouldn’t do something like this especially in ’rough’ area that I grew up in. I am willing to rethink my approach if I am the minority though.