To be put off bloke for silly reason?

[SmellyFrenchyBum]

Been seeing someone for a few weeks, we went to cinema at weekend and at the end of the film he stood up and clapped. A few people were staring at him and laughing - I was mortified and I know it’s a stupid reason but it’s really given me the “ick”. I don’t know why it’s got to me so much. I guess I’m being unreasonable? In hindsight there have been other examples of him drawing attention to himself and I just find it really embarrassing and it makes me uncomfortable. I’m extremely introverted which obviously doesn’t help!

In hindsight there have been other examples of him drawing attention to himself

He’ll keep doing things like this, whatever the reason he wants to be the centre of attention. I couldn’t be with someone so childish.

Not unreasonable at all. Obviously the clapping thing is harmless, but I do think it reveals something about his personality, which is that he will happily draw attention to himself and is not easily embarrassed by making a big deal of things in public. Clearly, he isn't doing that in a negative way, but if you're a very introverted and generally discreet, private, non-attention-seeking kind of person, obviously that kind of thing is going to make you cringe every time - I would feel exactly the same as you did!

Years ago my friend started dating again and she was extremely particular.

She joined a dating site and I used to love hearing about any meet ups she had as her reasons for binning them were so funny.

One turned up with no jacket and his sleeves rolled up. This was long after Miami Vice aired.

She arranged to meet one in a country pub and when she arrived she saw that he hadn't gone inside but was standing outside by the door holding a large gold umbrella. The umbrella put her off and the evening was already ruined! 🤷🏼‍♀️😂

She had liked the profile photos of one man and chatted for awhile online and he seemed lovely.

When she met him, he smiled and out popped two ginormous buck teeth. She lost interest.

There were many more frogs (in her mind) before she finally met her Prince and remarried.

It's so funny hearing someone else describe their reasons why they found someone a turn off!

For entertainment value, what other things does he do to draw attention to himself? (Non reason at all - I totally think you can dump him because you don't like the way he walks if that's your thing) but I am ridiculously nosey.

Maybe this is a particular problem with online dating? I can think of half a dozen similar reasons for not being interested in various men over the years, but I never even went on dates with them. eg at uni. Friend might say, "why don't you go out with Pete, he clearly likes you" and I'd be like, "oh god no, do you see the t-shirts he wears?" or whatever.

On the other hand, I once had a short fling with a man I knew through our uni sports group. At some point after, one of his friends told me that I'd done something ridiculous and funny one day and the guy had turned to him and said, "I'm going to kiss that girl soon". I forget what I'd done but it was so completely random. (no complaints here... it was a fun fling and 30 odd years later he's still a friend albeit a long distance one! )

It's not about reasonable/unreasonable.

In hindsight there have been other examples of him drawing attention to himself and I just find it really embarrassing and it makes me uncomfortable. I’m extremely introverted

You're not compatible. No need for agonising.

Well that's Irish guys written off 😂.

People here thank bus drivers too. Well , in rural parts at least.

Unless it was the National Anthem? Help....

When I was a student I went for coffee with a guy i kind of knew through mutual frienda. I admit I suspected he liked me and if it was a date I'd have said no, but it was more that we happened to be going the same way at the same time and decided to stop for coffee. He stood up and serenaded me inside in the bloody cafe. Singing full volume looking me in the eye. I am very easily embarrassed anyhow but i think anyone would die in that situation. I can't even remember the song. We didnt go for coffee again, needless to say.

Same in the regional city suburbs where I live. And I clap only on chartered flights not regular ones. Perfectly normal behaviour 😀

Wait, not everybody thanks bus drivers?!? I live in Edinburgh and almost everyone does it here.

Oh weird! Why would you clap a screen!? It would also give me the ick and I have an extremely extroverted husband.

My partners like this (he got up and danced ant the cinema before) and it doesn’t bother me at all. I love that he doesn’t care what people think but if it bothers you you probably aren’t a match

If they’re flying Ryan Air I’m not surprised they’re clapping, relief that they’ve actually landed without too many hard bumps probably. 😁

Trust your gut if you’ve got the ick. I had a bf who would use a ridiculous substitute word instead of f*ck and it gave me the serious ick. Soon dumped.

I’m interested to know if you think that he simply doesn’t seem aware that this sort of behaviour is a bit socially awkward or if you think he’s doing it to deliberately make himself the centre of attention. I’d be able to deal with the former even though it would be embarrassing but not the latter.

I can see why you would get the ick when someone is a public embarrassment. I would too.

I live in SE England, same here. I’ve taken the bus in other countries and have heard people thank the bus driver.

YANBU to dump him for any reason, it doesn't matter how small it seems, you feel how you feel.

That is totally embarrassing though, I'd have died a bit inside 😂

Ha, when the ick strikes, it strikes hard. Listen to it. Bin him. Never ignore it, you shouldn’t be trying to compromise at the beginning.

That said, if it’s worthy of a standing ovation I’ll go and see it.

I’d always thank a bus driver. I’d get the ick if a man didn’t and I’d think him a rude, superior twat.

Oh that would give me an ick massively.

You're not compatible so let him go and some other woman won't mind, he just needs someone more compatible.

I did have a chuckle 😂😂 I don’t know what either OP or date look like, but I still had a strong image in my head.

OP, he sounds hilarious, perhaps he is just a bit of a free spirit. If he was doing that during the film, yeah I’d be cringing and annoyed, but the film had finished and he obviously really enjoyed it. What was the film btw?

I was once in the cinema when everyone clapped. It was when Die Hard was released in 1988. I was fifteen and excited to be visiting a friend and watching it in Leicester Square. I joined in. But I was young and didn’t know better…

My friend from Canada used to do same, he said It was normal back there.

Might even clap at the end of sex 🤷🏻‍♀️😂