Husband went to friends house for dinner and didn't get back until 4am. Aibu to find this odd?

[JudyLemon]

DH has a friendship group of about 10, all male. Friends fiance loves to invite all of their friendship group over on a semi regular basis and cook for them. He has been twice before and came home around 11 each time.

Last night was one of these meals, she was making chimichangas apparently. He left for theirs at around 5 and got back at 4am this morning. He was a little drunk but seemed fine. We didn't really speak last night and obviously he's still asleep this morning. He doesn’t go out much and is great in all other ways so this really shouldn't bother me but I just feel really uncomfortable with how long he was there.

To be clear, I do not particularly like the fiance and this may be clouding my judgement. I find it quite desperate that she wants to invite a group of men over and cook for them. She's quite abit younger than me and DH and his friends so I guess I'm making a judgement on that too.

Aibu to be annoyed or should I try to not be grumpy with him when he wakes up?

Haha like I said we don’t all know the bigger pic or the past of others

you are very judgemental hope your life is as perfect as you

This wouldn’t bother me at all! Either you trust him or don’t. Sometimes I get in at 4am after a big night out. What’s the problem??
I think it’s nice the fiancée wants to cook for them

If it was me it would be a one-off and I would be happy that my DH had a good time. 4am finish means it was a fun night with friends and now he can look after the children and it’s your turn next for time out / night out etc. if he was steaming drunk and I had plans the next day I would be annoyed but it doesn’t sound like he was. Maybe they had a long game of poker or something

so he cooks for you all
doesn’t eat with you
replenishes drinks

Id feel a bit… guilty if i was a guest!

Absolutely, but they are his friends, so they aren’t just coming to see her. And the ops jealousy is a real issue here.

@Bestdressed it is, thank you for asking ☺️

She most likely doesn't trust her fiance and doesn't want him out in the town with his mates so is making it a 'thing' that everyone goes to theirs.

Your reading way too much into this.

If you have a problem with your H staying out till 4am then say so, but it's fuck all to do with her.

No one knows how old you are. But you clearly are jealous. Writhing in it. You even say In your op you judge her as she’s younger. And clearly this is far from she’s inviting them over and her partner is irrelevant, as you’re making out.

I doubt it 😆

Or maybe they are just a normal couple, he wants a night with his male friends and she’s happy to cook as she enjoys it?

😂 Quite

The misogyny on here is shocking. It’s her partners friends, it’s his friendship circle, they all go to his and she’s happy to cook. Wtaf with the pick me mentality.

No she invites them all. It’s her party not his.

Sorry but you sound a bit 'pipe and slippers' no offence 😂

Maybe that's why your DH needs a proper night out every now and again to have some fun.

I think you’re being a bit of a killjoy. A group of friends have a get together which goes on to the small hours because they are having a fun night - is it really that unusual? If they wanted a dinner party with partners included that sounds like a different kind of evening entirely. It’s quite possible she cooks and leaves them to it or she’s trying to get into her dp’s good books by getting on with his friends - nothing wrong either way really.

It’s clearly not. It’s her partners friendship circle. You cannot honestly believe the partner is irrelevant and it’s all about her, just simply as the op is so jealous she thinks that. Cmon.

How is it her party? Do people seriously think she messages all these blokes to invite them surely the much more logical scenario is he texts his mates and asks if they want to come over for the night and mentions that his partner will be cooking.

I wouldn't think twice about it if dh to stayed out that late if with old friends, even for dinner. He's certainly come back in the small hours and I just take it he's had a really nice night with them

🤷‍♀️ I read the OP as the girlfriend invites the men round and feeds them all. So it is her party.

I consider that if it was his party, He would invite them round. She might cook if she fancied, then leave them to it. On what planet do we live where a man doesn’t invite his own mates and his fiancée has to do it for him? Is he a child?? If that’s the case, that’s weird in itself.

You and your 'friend' are jealous. The end.

Yes, that’s absolutely how it’s written. But it is clearly as her partner wants this, he isn’t an irrelevance here.

No but the one I'm referring to definitely does.

Ok. I genuinely hadn’t considered that he was a child and she was trying to please him by inviting his friends For him. But that is probably it. If they’re both happy who cares. It’s just OP isn’t particularly happy about it.

Isn't it just her doing something nice for her fiancé, offering to cook when he hosts his friends?
If you are annoyed with 4am that's one thing, but if it's only because a woman was in her own house cooking food for her husbands guests that's another.

I think this is more about you feeling a little insecure about the friend's fiance. Is she attractive?
I don't think him coming back at 4am is that unreasonable. I've had nights with friends where we all drink a little too much and stay up half the night talking.