Husband hates taking his shoes off inside

[WarmSwan]

… that’s it, really.

We live in a city centre, and when we walk outside, we frequently see dog poo on the pavements, and occasionally vermin.

However, I apparently am a massive nag because I want him to take his outdoor shoes* off when inside our flat or other people’s homes.

*I even bought him really nice slippers, as I know he doesn’t like the feeling of walking barefoot through the flat. He puts them on most of the time but still complains that I am being difficult.

It may not surprise you to learn I am the person who does almost all of the cleaning.

Can anyone else relate to this situation or AIBU?

Love it 😂

I'd rather you kept your shoes on in my house thanks. I don't want to see your feet. <shudder>

We all wear our shoes indoors. We wipe them on the mat on the way in so we would notice if there was any dog poo or whatever on them. There are probably germs on them, but we don't tend to lick the floor or eat off it so it's all good.

The house rule is to remove shoes, I can’t see the rudeness in expecting them to do so.

FIL has tracked mud in our living room as he ‘forgot’ to take his shoes off - he was embarrassed and I was actually able to say this is why we don’t wear shoes in the house.

I’d say most people here shower once or twice a day. You’d survive. But if you prefer chemicals, e-coli and dog poo, then I’m sure your guests will be happy to keep their shoes on.

We have a doormat. I imagine most grown adults know how to wipe their feet.

How does that remove mud, rain, or bacteria? Even if you like the feeling of wearing shoes, why wouldn't you just have clean shoes by the door to change into?

We also have a doormat. But it’s not me.

They aren't present in sufficient quantities or format to cause a problem and I don't want to faff around changing. People can do things differently to you - that's allowed. You do you as they say.

@LovelyTheresa

my floors do trump guests comfort 🤷‍♀️

guests are there for a bit but the floors are there all the time

Again, what is so precious about your floors that shoes cannot be worn? Obviously, if people are tracking dirt and mud in, that is one thing, but I can't think of a scenario where I have ever tracked dirt into a home. If I'm going to a dinner party in a pair of fancy heels, I am not taking them off, end of story. I am reminded of Carrie Bradshaw in that one episode of SATC......

I have some Sketchers type trainers I wear indoors during the day, they’ve never set foot (pun intended) outside. Change into slippers after work (I WFH full time). Wearing shoes would make me think I’m off out.

A pair of trainers to wear only indoors?

If you are going to a dinner party you can bring your clean party shoes. As long as your high heels don’t damage our precious floors that is.

Mud and rain would come off on the mat, and yes bacteria would be present but so what? Again, you won't be eating off the floors, or operating on them. Pretty much everyone who calls to my house has just stepped out of a car, if they had to walk through muddy fields then that would be different.

Presumably he doesn't put his shoes on until he has to go outside? So it's not like he gets out of bed / the shower & puts his shoes on?

Really, as you do the cleaning what you say goes. He has indoor shoes & slippers so he should just get over it and stop grumbling.

I would like to keep outside shoes outside, but I just can't be bothered to keep changing my shoes all the time.

As the username suggests, I am Canadian.
I love reading Mumsnet and find the cultural difference so interesting.
I am always so surprised about this topic - in Canada, no one would wear their shoes in their own, or someone else’s house! It isn’t even a debate.
It would be considered very rude to leave your shoes on in someone’s house and they would likely ask you to remove them.
Your husband IBU!

I'm not sure what you mean by this. Would the clean party shoes need to have never been worn outside?

Clean means clean?

They aren't present in sufficient quantities or format to cause a problem and I don't want to faff around changing. People can do things differently to you - that's allowed. You do you as they say.

nobody said you can't 'do youZ' I'm just asking a question xx

Quite! My in laws’ parquet was utterly wrecked by stilettos years ago. I won’t risk the same to my flooring.

I can’t fathom having in my house anyone who says “I WILL be doing xyz to your home, end of story, regardless of what you prefer”! They’d be shown the door. That’s a level of rude that far exceeds any request to remove shoes.

Mud and rain does not come off on the mat. Although we take our shoes off, the area by the door gets wet and mucky with leaf debris on rainy days.

I don't understand why you wouldn't just have clean house shoes.

Why would you choose to introduce dirt and mess onto floors and rugs if it can be entirely avoided ?

Indoor shoes, like comfortable trainers is the answer.

He showers regularly. If he didn’t, that would be a different matter. It’s dust and dirty floors that are invisible to him!