Husband hates taking his shoes off inside

[WarmSwan]

… that’s it, really.

We live in a city centre, and when we walk outside, we frequently see dog poo on the pavements, and occasionally vermin.

However, I apparently am a massive nag because I want him to take his outdoor shoes* off when inside our flat or other people’s homes.

*I even bought him really nice slippers, as I know he doesn’t like the feeling of walking barefoot through the flat. He puts them on most of the time but still complains that I am being difficult.

It may not surprise you to learn I am the person who does almost all of the cleaning.

Can anyone else relate to this situation or AIBU?

You can say this about any habit.

He wants to leave underwear on the floor, you don't. Pick up your own then.

He doesn't want to mop and you want clean floors. You mop up then.

It doesn't work.

And as pp said - indoor shoes. There is no reason why he must where outdoor shoes inside besides laziness and maybe wanting to annoy op.

If you do all the cleaning then he can damn well take his shoes off. Non negotiable. If he wants to take over all the cleaning then fine.

They make an exception for things like the christmas show, we can keep our shoes on then because otherwise there would be too much shoes in the hallways but obviously the cleaners give the floors a good clean afterwards, but otherwise yeah shoes off. My DD's teacher had to tie my shoelaces for me once because I was holding baby DS at the time

Surely you could say the opposite too? She could just let him wear the shoes he's comfortable wearing and if she doesn't it says a lot about how little she cares about her partner?

Yeah, but it's my feet!

Hei, fellow Nordics! We know we’re right, yes? 😉

So stay outside then, your choice.

I think it must be a cultural difference. I can't imagine anyone asking me to remove my shoes in their home and I would consider them extremely rude.

We could possibly go to war over this. 😂 It’s a hill to die on.

No. You have a better society than we do in many, many ways but this isn't one of them imo.

Certainly our floors are cleaner!

If you tried that in this country, I would be telling everyone I knew how rude you were and warn them not to go round to see you. I accept that it is different in other countries.

But it's almost universally accepted you don't leave stinky underwear around and you clean your house. And if the other person really does disagree with those maybe they are not a compatible couple.

The shoe one is personal preference with no right or wrong answer. So why does 1 person get to decide what the other does even if it makes the other uncomfortable?

He does however need to help clean though!

Of course its a cultural difference, many cultures are like this while some are not. But I grew up in the UK and my parents had the same rule, and all my friend's families had the same rule too. I only occasionally visited houses where you didn't take your shoes off (and it felt very very weird and wrong to me, so of course I understand it would feel weird and wrong to you to do the opposite of what you're used to) so the UK culture isn't all shoes on, its quite a split.

How is it unhygienic? Are you licking the floor? What do you think is going to happen?

I find that most visitors take their shoes off, even trades people.
My husbands parents are the only
people who have an issue with taking shoes off in the house. Even after 25 years they will be passive aggressive about it.

I wouldn’t. I always ask when in the UK, or anywhere. And accept the answer. It’s up to the home owner, not me. I lived in the UK for five years, our friends did not have shoes on.

If you are trying to create a rhetoric that sweaty feet are worse than all the stuff your shoes walk in you will have to try harder.
Good grief. Trekking in shoes that have walked on piss in public toilets, residual faecal matter from dogs or again public loos, road grime and dirt and suggesting that feet are worse is just peculiar

You are rude to make them take their shoes off, I don't blame them. Unless they are literally tracking in mud, you have no right to give them a hard time.

I hate outdoor shoes inside. I find it disgusting. If he wants to wear shoes inside why can't he buy himself a pair of trainers or something that he just uses inside the house? Problem solved.

Nei. The Nordics have spoken⚡️… 😆

We’re a no outdoor shoe indoors household. If you don’t want to take off your shoes then we have shoe covers but you will not be walking around my house with outdoor shoes on.

@LovelyTheresa Am being light-hearted btw. It’s up to the householder, obvs. But it’s interesting how different cultures view this issue.

See I would find it extremely rude if someone entered my home and didnt take their shoes off

See I am a no outdoor shoes house. I don't have covers. If people don't want to take their shoes off then they can leave again 😂 I don't care.