To be sick of the police!!

[Noangelbuthavingfun]

Yet another one .... rapist ..before He even joined the force. WTAF is going on ?
You can't trust the very people that you are supposed to ! Add to that the failings of the police "force" dealing with Grace and Barnaby case recently and the awful disrespectful texts that we heard about .... and you just think what de hell is going on !! Unforgivable!

I've said on this thread that the media definitely have a big part to play in public perception of the police. I've also said that people just follow what the media are portraying without thinking critically. The numbers of 'good' for want of a better word, police officers far outweigh the bad ones. And I know that there should be no bad police officers AT ALL.

People don't want to think about how many interactions with the police are had every single day and the vast majority are positive. But people don't want to think about that. They want to be angry and blame every police officer for every bad interaction they've had or every story they've read that paints the police in a bad light.

I agree it's so, so depressing. I also agree about the media which is odd because stuff about police aside, pretty much 80% of the rest of the news is made up of heinous stories of crime that police have dealt with efficiently and proactively with a huge impact on them and the critics on here will never understand the impact, you can't switch off from it. It isn't some horrific tragedy in the news, it's your job a minimum of 60 hours a week, it isn't a true crime documentary where the way something was solved is exciting and interesting, it's telling a family their loved one isn't coming home after being with the deceased, the emotional impact and then going straight to a completely different scenario ten minutes later with no time to decompress and someone who hates police shouting at you over something trivial then coming on here to say they hate police because they didn't tell their neighbour to move their car on a public road. Then the thread spiralling into calling you all murderers and God knows what, after what you've just been to. Then doing it all again tomorrow and never, ever being allowed to complain. Even other women hate you because you're allowed to be just about anything as a woman but you can not be a police officer, no matter whether you love it or what your reasons for joining were, they want the purge and if you point out why this wouldn't work and try to engage you're bombarded with abuse.

There is a power imbalance that sways in the favour of the police.

That you can equate what has been said in this thread as "couldn't care less about me and infact would probably like to see me and my colleagues suffer in some capacity." That just shows disordered thinking to me. It isn't what the thread is about, and even if it were true (and again, I am not really as callous as I am going to sound here), so what? Some people would take some nasty little pleasure in seeing any police officer discomfited or even harmed. Does that preclude you from doing your job? Does it stop you from being angry at the cause instead of the symptom? I should very much hope not! I would also very sincerely hope that you take every precaution to keep yourself safe from harm in the course of your work - as you should.

I would be concerned about any serving police officer who gains the outlook bolded above as a takeaway from this thread, in regards to their capacity to effectively, and without bias or fear (fear or favour if you will), do their job. I am not being mean in saying that, it is a genuine and politely worded concern.

Don't blame the media for reporting facts!
That again is a really worrying perspective. Would you rather it was all hidden away and never reported on? Or is there some kind of middle ground in reporting you think they are missing, do you think these stories are somehow sensationalised? I personally don't think they need sensationalised, they are already bad enough as they are.

You (again) should be blaming the corruption and violence displayed by certain elements of the police.

What critical thinking do you think should be applied to the stories being reported? That is a genuine question, tone is so hard to read with text.

Massive huge projection going on here. Where are all the posts calling the police murderers?

we all know the job is tough but we also know there are corrupt officers - and for every one that gets winkled out and exposed, who’s to say there aren’t 10 more behind them?

all I’ve seen from the police on here is defensiveness which you might think is justified and it probably is - but hyperbole isn’t helping anyone when people are rightfully wary of what police officer might turn up when you need them. And I don’t hate the police, far from it - but only one of you has really acknowledged those on the other side might have a point about all of this.

And a slightly facetious question, how many corrupt and violent police officers is too many? How many are an acceptable number before the police get "a bad name".

I think our perspectives are just worlds apart. I have been in a completely different place, living a very different life and therefore have a very different mindset to you for many years. All of my experiences are from my side of thinking as yours are where you're coming from. I really appreciate your reply, unfortunately the so what part ( I know you didn't mean to be callous ) is why so many police officers are in such a dark place, because people like yourselves and I'm sure many others don't care what happens to us as the response is always that something in another force with other people that we have never crossed paths with happened and we therefore deserve it by holding the same job title. This is the narrative that is constantly, loudly shouted at us all day long so is it any wonder police tend to stick with other police who understand what they're going through. I don't blame the media for.reporting facts at all, but I do blame them for the biased narrative from certain outlets. There is so much good that goes on in policing, it's very sad . Ultimately, I care far more about the very vulnerable and children than I do about adults who are critical of us but it really does affect me as it does many, many others when we are compared to the disgusting criminals who we have to closely deal with in order to protect the aforementioned. It actually makes quite a lot of police officers very ill indeed. Thank you very much for responding though, as I say I'm not saying I'm right and you're wrong just trying to shed some light from the other side. I hope to meet more people like you in my career who are willing to engage as it is important for bridging the gap spoken about up thread.

And again that is some disordered thinking IMO.

I clearly do care what happens to you, I have said it out loud and I think you can obviously see that from my responses.

My "so what?", which I tried to caveat so carefully to show that in fact I do care, was meant to prompt you into thinking a bit about those that actually do feel they want to see police discomfited or harmed.

This is where I think therapy would be useful. I know it must grind you down to come across the angry and disenfranchised public, I understand that is magnified by the few who do want to hurt you with words or actions. But that is going to be a part of your job until the problems are accepted and addressed. It won't even entirely go away then because some people are just out to cause trouble no matter what, again that is something that you will have to deal with in the course of your duty. It isn't right, and it isn't fair, but it is life sometimes. Therapy might help you to come to better terms with that instead of it bleeding out in not very constructive ways - as shown on this thread with how you are taking in the complaints.

Regarding the media, can you explain what you mean by "biased narrative from certain outlets" - how, and in what way? Which outlets?

The issue for me is that I, and I'm sure most of the contributors in this thread, have at least some understanding of how difficult your jobs must be. There has been very little, almost zero, understanding from the self-styled (and I only say that because no one really knows who anyone actually is online) police officers in this thread.

Also, could you break up your responses with paragraphs please? A lot of people struggle with one big lump of text. It would make it easier to read all round, and a bit more accessible to those that need it.

Edit: To add IMO to first sentence.

There are defo some dodgy individuals in the police (and many many more decent individuals) but no doubt we the general public are much worse as a demographic.

@MenArePeopleToo I understand what you are saying and where you are coming from. I fully admit that I have no idea what a police officer will do on any given shift and I won't deny that they see and deal with situations that I couldn't even comprehend.

I can only speak for myself and my own experiences but my perception of the police is based on what I have personally experienced myself. I have had someone force their way into my house and assault me, only to be told it's a civil matter and considered trespass (not true, it is criminal).

My DH was assaulted in the park and the police did all they could to talk him out of wanting to take any further action.

We had neighbours threaten us and traumatise my children yet the police told me that harassment can't come from neighbours (which is false).

My daughter suffered serious psychiatric harm from a crime and the police continuously minimised it telling me that what the people did couldn't possibly cause her harm to that extent. They suddenly became experts on my daughter and on autism. They then discriminated against my daughter disability but then backed down when I challenged them. They told me that you have to physically put your hands on someone for it to be considered ABH (not true). They then sent officers out to my home in full uniform to talk to my daughter after a comment she made AFTER being told my numerous professionals not to turn up at the house.

I've had another set of officers tell my husband that it's perfectly fine for his sons stepfather to watch him through a camera in his bedroom while getting undressed, watching him the toilet etc because the mum had given him permission.

As you can appreciate, my perception is based upon how I have been treated and continuously told incorrect information regarding the law. I don't know whether this is to deter me from wanting further action or because they actually don't know the law but either way, it's highly concerning.

I don't hate police. I am grateful they are there but I personally would not contact them unless it was a life threatening situation. It's pushing people to want to sort matter out themselves and I think there will be an increase in vigilante action, rightly or wrongly.

I have engaged with the police many times and they have just lowered my opinion of them each and every time unfortunately.

There have only been a small handful of people on this thread who have said they are a police officer, one of which has flounced off and it is very doubtful that she actually is one.

To answer your question directly to me, @HatThatWearsYou it just upsets me that people lump the police as one big mass of horrible corrupt officers. I wish people would realise that that's not the case.

I understand that there is no trust anymore, I get it, I really do. I just don't know what the every day officer on the ground can do when they're telling 'you' how they feel and the things they do and see every day and all they get back from people on here is... 'well I don't care, that's what you're trained for... you're still part of the problem.'

I don't have the answers but when officers are trying to tell you that they do care, they do want things to change and people are still sticking their fingers in their ears and not listening, what can they do?

"it just upsets me that people lump the police as one big mass of horrible corrupt officers. I wish people would realise that that's not the case."

I understand, it would be very upsetting to me if I were an officer too. However you need to understand that people can't spend all their time caveating with "I know not NAPALT but..." and trying to voice their anger whilst not upsetting other police officers.

It's on you, as the police, to be able to put aside the sweeping generalisations when they are made, to be able to carry on in the face of hurtful words, to use the law as it was intended to deal with anyone who does something actually illegal towards you.

These things are necessary in order to carry out your duty. No one is disputing that it is hard, unpleasant to sometimes really very distressing, nor are they disputing that it will have a lasting impact on you in terms of it just grinds you down. But if you can't (Edit here) find a way to deal with it, you will burn out, or maybe you are in the wrong profession - said as kindly as possible.

If you cannot get over this and focus on the real problem - which is the criminal, violent and corrupt members of the police - then I am really sorry to be blunt, but your attitude is part of the problem.

It will not get at all better until members of the police direct their anger and frustration in the right direction. If you continue to direct it at the public voicing their dissatisfaction and well founded fear, it will only get worse.

Only you (royal you) can fix it really.

Edit: (in bold)

I'm not a police officer. I was, but I left. I didnt want to admit that though as I don't want to have to name change. But if people want transparency then there you go.

Another one who cared deeply and wanted to make a difference but I've left.

I am really sorry I realised you had said you weren't an officer earlier but didn't want to try and edit again, or add another post to say so because I feel like I've taken up huge swathes of time already in this thread.

I am sorry I prompted you to "out" yourself.

I should have included the lazy and incompetent in the list of problems the public have with the police. It's an important part of it.
As is shown anecdotally in this thread there is far too much of that going round, and these encounters don't get reported in the media at all.

I just want to point out that it's been really hard to put across my points without putting anyone's back up or being misinterpreted. Sometimes you have to get past the tone (intentional or interpreted by you) of words like "you and your mates", or "the police" and listen to the meaning behind it.

That's not easy to do, it requires a healthy emotional (professional) distance whilst maintaining an open mind.

It should never be a case of
J. Public: "The police are useless because I experienced XYZ bad things"
Really decent police officer: "Well we aren't all bad! I have done ABC good things, and all my mates (see above about interpretation of tone) are the same"

Because it's not helpful. You aren't listening, you are invalidating. And sorry but you do need to be the "bigger person" in these exchanges.

No one benefits in that exchange. As I said earlier you cannot erase the bad with any amount of good. The bad needs preventing against in the first place. Those who have experienced the bad need to be listened to, no matter how angry they are - because they are right to be angry about it.

If you don't listen, if you invalidate, if you try to offset, you just make it worse.

*Caveat: "You" - always with the Royal you here, I am not directing this at any particular poster.

Completely agree with this , someone upthread complained at the press reporting crimes being committed by police officers . It is absolutely right that any crimes are reported they should never go under the radar . And as for hating the police , a certain section of society have always hated them . The rest of us we have a certain amount of distrust which police complain about .Is it our fault we distrust ? No you should turn your anger where it should be . Those that let the rotten apples in and those who cover-up for them until it can't be covered up anymore .

I understand that there is no trust anymore, I get it, I really do. I just don't know what the every day officer on the ground can do when they're telling 'you' how they feel and the things they do and see every day and all they get back from people on here is... 'well I don't care, that's what you're trained for... you're still part of the problem.'

plenty of people have shared their experiences of poor behaviour by the police on here only for people saying they’re cops to say “well I’m not like that, so you can’t lump us all in together”. It goes both ways - you trying to shut people up by thinking of the worst things you have to deal with and flinging them at people isn’t really right either. You can’t turn yourselves into the victims to avoid the uncomfortable truth that even if the number of truly bad eggs is low (ish), plenty of police officers are incompetent, callous, unhelpful, lazy.

as far as I can see on this thread absolutely nobody has wished any harm on the police. Just pointed out that the conduct is, at times, below what the public has a right to expect. The public has a right to voice that too, even if it offends individual officers

I'm really enjoying this conversation and have read through the posts with interest.

What do you think the police should do to change these perceptions? How can we show the public that we aren't all shit and gain back that trust?

I personally think we should show more of our body worn videos to give a more realistic view of the jobs we attend, that would be a start.

I feel that treating victims concerns with kindness and understanding would go a long way as well as not picking and choosing which laws to uphold and what not to bother with. I also feel that officers need to stop giving misinformation about the law and fobbing people off.

@RosieTheChi

Thank you for the reply ☺️ and I agree.
Can you tell me how we can demonstrate that? Because, I like to think I do what you have said, but it's apparent this doesn't translate, what can "the police" do to show this so that it's conveyed and can be recognised?

Who said anything about you giving up your career? You sound eminently suitable for it. 😂