Upset that husband eats my leftovers

[Triste1992]

I know its a petty situation, but I cant help but getting upset/annoyed when I dont finish my food/snack, step away from the table (to help our child for example) and come back to an empty plate because DH ate it. His excuse? I thought it was leftovers and nobody wanted it.

It happens frequently and its always the same excuse. I dont yell at him, just complain. But now, he gets upset. Today, he told me I was cheap and it degenerated into a big fight, because we are both fed up. He thinks he does nothing wrong, I feel annoyed that something I expected to eat dissapeared and that the same situation repeats and repeats. AIBU?

Good God! I'd be wiring the plate up to the mains with a switch that I could activate remotely. I'd also sneak in a nanny cam so that I could film the result and snigger repeatedly.

I think I may have been a Vengeance Demon in a past life.

That clears things up a bit. He needs counselling to sort this out. He’s just re-enacting a behaviour that was familiar to him during the hard times. This would be understandable if he was a child. As an adult, he is expected to actively stop behaving like this. It’s just inconsiderate and selfish.

You are not being unreasonable. He is a CF. Your husband needs to ask EVERY TIME before he finishes the food on your plate or risk a fork through the back of his hand. Nothing gets wasted in our house (I have 2 teenage boys) but no-one takes food without asking.

Do you not tell him you still want the food when you leave for a few minutes? Or simply eat it all at once instead of keep leaving it?

Just tell him, “I’m not finished so keep your fork/grubby mitts off my food”.
Granted you shouldn’t have to but it’s clear you need to

Just say "I'm not finished yet I'm just dealing with .... : whatever" . If he still eats your stuff after staing you haven't finished, maybe give him a bigger portion to begin with.