To not "get" the requirement for alcohol to have a proper celebration

[MrsCulpepper]

I'm in the process of organising a meal for my birthday and considering a nice restaurant that's around 15 minutes drive away. I suggested it to others and was met without enthusiasm and "but some people won't be able to drink then".

I've never really felt that I "needed" a glass of wine or something else alcoholic after a tough day. I like it, and have a glass of wine or a beer or a gin and tonic when I'm out or visiting someone if they offer, but we don't generally have alcohol at home (perhaps in part because the expense).

When I was pregnant, I didn't miss drinking at all. It seemed to make people very uncomfortable though that I was "only" drinking water and they would fall over themselves to think of options they could offer. One friend of my husband's was really pushy about a small glass of wine, assuring me that it was absolutely fine to have while pregnant and his wife is a gynecologist so he knows what he's talking about. I had to say no 5 or 6 times!

I admire the PR that sparkling wine companies have done on their product so prosecco at the very least has to be budgeted for my party. And a taxi will be required too I suppose.

AIBU to consider a restaurant that would require a short drive? Is alcohol such a necessity for a party to be good?

It seems that some people cannot enjoy themselves without getting hammered, which is pretty sad really. Pick where you want to go if they are so obsessed with alcohol that they have to have more than 1 then they can get a taxi!

How many times...

In Scotland you can't just have one and drive. Many people in other parts of the country choose not to risk it either. Having more than one drink does not equal "getting hammered".

@MrsCulpepper have you looked into getting caterers/chef into the cottage? If there are several of you, might not be any more expensive than a restaurant.

My friends don't get hammered when we go out but we enjoy alcohol with our meal. I'm dieting at the moment so would offer to drive but I wouldn't normally offer.

Obviously it's cultural. Muslims manage to have celebratory events without alcohol. That said I do enjoy a glass of wine with my meal, especially when socialising. I very rarely drink at home but when I go out with friends I usually have a maximum of two glasses of wine. It's a social lubricant. It makes me feel relaxed, happy and chatty. I'm perfectly happy without wine too but I see it as a little treat - just like I might get dessert when out with friends, yet I don't have dessert at home.

Nowhere in her original post does it mention Scotland but that is beside the point, if you want a drink, want lots of drinks, don't want to drive after said drinks whatever they are then get a taxi! Split between several people a 15minute journey will be a few pounds each - it's that simple!

So get a taxi - it's not rocket science

I do get a taxi 😁.

You OK?

@Heidi75 it is OP moaning about getting a taxi not other posters.

Did OP say she was offering to drive a few of them seeing as she doesn't mind not drinking?

If you’re staying in a cottage all together, that does simplify it. How many people are staying, @MrsCulpepper ? If it’s eg 8, you could drive one car and see if anyone wanted to drive another. If not, could you take one car (assuming you’re happy to drive) and all split the £60 taxi cost between you for the remaining people?

I haven't drunk anything for a while but i so understand that a glass of wine or two is nice and adds to the vibe and conversation. Taxis are ankther issue. I would plan it nearer and more convenient for others

It's not about getting 'hammered'. I love a glass of wine or two but I don't touch a drop if I am driving, personal choice, I wouldn't even have a small one.

If I am having a night out, having to get a babysitter etc, I want to enjoy a glass of wine with my dinner and I'm not sorry!