Random man moved my beach bag and towel from my sun lounger and chucked them on another one behind

[Winter3000]

I'm on holidays.
I arrived at the little beach early for a swim.
There are free sun loungers there for everyone to use, plenty were free.

I put my bag and towel (scrunched up)on a free sun lounger at the front, closest to the water, lay there for a bit and then went for a swim. The water is very close by.
While I was in the water, I saw a young woman, a middle aged woman and a middle aged man arrive by my sun lounger.
The 2 women lay down on two empty sun loungers next to mine.
The man hovered around for a bit, he was standing there beside my sun lounger, looked around and then chucked my bag and towel on to a different sun lounger behind mine. He made to put his stuff on my sun lounger.
I saw it all.
I got out of the water went up to him and gave him a piece of my mind. Loudly. People started looking. He denied it but I told him I was watching him.
He looked embarrassed.
The younger woman said something, don't know what but it wasn't 'sorry', and I told her not to make excuses for him.
They all looked mortified.
A girl on her own nearby looked over approvingly.

Females raising their voices in public is 'vile' now? God forbid

This is a tricky one.

Clearly what he did was totally inconsiderate and well done for standing up for yourself. Some of the responses on here really do highlight the continued way in which women's actions are subjected to a higher level of scrutiny than men and we always seem to be happier to tip over the fine line of labelling something as aggressive when it comes from a woman.

I suppose it then makes complete sense that those same people accusing you of being aggressive are also the same people who seem to be suggesting that in those circumstances they themselves would meekly take up residence on the sun lounger that he had thrown their belongings onto and not say a word.

All that being said, it is incredibly annoying to see rows upon rows of sun loungers draped with towels when people have taken themselves off somewhere else for the day (and it's why I can't bear hotels in peak season anymore), so I suppose it's possible that that's what he thought had happened, but still, suspect if it had been a choice between moving a man's stuff and moving a woman's stuff...

No one said that.

Some of the responses on here really do highlight the continued way in which women's actions are subjected to a higher level of scrutiny than men and we always seem to be happier to tip over the fine line of labelling something as aggressive when it comes from a woman.

Not necessarily. If the OP was a man and explained how a woman moved his stuff off a sun lounger and he said he confronted her

I was pretty loud.... right up in her face.

He would, I hope, be told he was needlessly aggressive and threatening towards a woman. So why not say the same to a woman who seems very proud of herself. Even looking around her to notice others looking "approvingly" at her.

Similar thing happened to me today! I was going to a table to collect something that belonged to me. It was on a table with lots of things belonging to lots of people. I seen the person in charge of this table walk off as I was approaching. When he arrived back I gave him the ticket for my item - it’s valuable but also highly sentimental … and it couldn’t be found. I suggested perhaps it had been stolen when the table and its contents were left unmanned. He absolutely denied leaving the table or its contents unmanned! I explained that I’d seen him walk off and again he denied it 😂 so I called him a gaslighter! While he was flicking through pages of inventory looking for where my item could be I casually picked up items and put them behind my back just to prove my point …the table was not secure! When he finally found my item I gave him the items back…and took a photograph of the unmanned table when he wandered off again. I may send it on to his bosses ….

YANBU I would have done the same OP.
If it was just a beach towel that he moved, fair enough, but I'm assuming there are other belongings too, it's not acceptable just to dump all of that onto another lounger.
😡

From one polite but assertive woman to another, well done, OP!

So what are you supposed to do with your belongings if you go in for a swim or paddle?

Sorry, but removing people's property is wrong. First come, first served.

Good for you! The woman who said something wouldn’t have said anything nice as people get very defensive when they are held accountable for their actions but he did something rude and got caught, deserves a telling off.

Agree. Did everyone miss the part about how he tried to deny it? He was the CF in this situation. Don’t touch someone else’s belongings. OP stated that there were other loungers available to them, he just wanted one in a better spot. If anything, he should have taken the one behind hers.

Ilovesooty - 'vile' was the word used upthread to describe op's behaviour

She was neither polite nor assertive.

For all the posters saying OP shouldn't have shouted at him and been aggressive, you should be asking why this man did not move the spare sun lounger nearer his family. I can understand OP reaction, once on holiday in Majorca, there was an absolute horrendous Spanish family who were friends of the hotel manager, two parents and 4 kids, youngest being approx 10, they used to saunter down to the pool and just chuck everyone's belongings off the loungers. The guests of all nationalities complained to manager about these people's arrogance but to no avail. They even tried to stop the kids from playing with a ball in the pool.

And not simply because she raised her voice.

I think reserving a sunlounger whilst in the pool is fine, reserving one and going back to your apartment/ for a meal/ for a walk isn't. Unfortunately people who do the latter are more numerous than people doing the former. He wasn't a nasty man just a man fed up with the sun lounge towel then run away brigade

Why would you leave a valuable item unattended on a table full of randoms? I really don't understand that post. If you're eating alone you take your valuables with you to the loo in a bag. I only leave my belongings at a table if a friend or relative is there. Look after your stuff.

Except this was on a public beach.

It's a round of applause from me @Winter3000

A few weeks ago in Walmart there were no shopping trolleys available. I ended up taking one with no back piece where the baby sits on it and a wonky wheel just to have one at all. Half way round the store and I farted off to get something from a crowded aisle and when I returned all my stuff was dumped on the floor and my trolley gone. I found it a few aisles away with someone else’s stuff in. Moved it back out and went back to my own pile. The nerve
of some people!

You deserve a round of applause. He knew what he was doing.

Or did he assume the bags belonged to a lounger reserver you had buggered off and intended to come back later? Cause most hotels would side with the person moving the bags in that instance

I'm stumped...your approach to this individual was rather explosive. I understand not liking your stuff being touched. Did you consider that they may have wanted to be poolside as they possibly had kids in the pool? It doesn't sound like you did.

Personally I'd have politely let him know that I wasn't happy that he touched my belongings and also moved them but I'd have acknowledged the fact that he scouted around. You say you watched him from his arrival to the point where he moved your belongings. Why didn't you alert him to the fact that you were there and that it was not technically unattended? We're you looking/waiting for a confrontation opportunity?

Then to post on here looking for some form of support...lady, you're on holiday, you were so affronted over a sunbed situation. I'm currently at work right now, working all the extra hours I can, recently made a single parent after my narcissist ran off for another woman after 20+ years together. Alot more post breakup stress caused by him that I won't go into. Haven't been abroad in years. I struggle to sympathise. I'd be grateful, as would my kids - to be on holiday, go in the pool, the sunbed is irrelevant. Gey your priorities straight.

I would be annoyed. He was behaving like an idiot.

We act how we feel at the time. Your blood was up at his actions! I admire you actually.

You aren’t at a pool but on a beach. In retrospect you may have over-reacted but he had absolutely no right to remove your belongings to another chair. Enjoy your holiday

Did you really then just lay down next to his wife for the day? Even though there were other loungers? How bloody awkies!