Recently widowed dad selling family home

[cambridgecoral]

My mum died in February last year. After starting dating before her funeral had even taken place, my dad almost immediately got himself a replacement servant from the OurTime dating website.

He is selling our family home, she is selling her little house, and they're going to buy a million pound house together.

He says he will put in his will that me and my brother are entitled to a quarter of the house upon the second death - the other two quarters being owned by her two grown up children.

He says he's 'protecting our inheritance' by putting it into property.
Is this true?
As far as I see it, my brother and I have gone from half each in the family home, to potentially a quarter in a house that half belongs his new girlfriend, who'll probably sell it to pay for her care costs in the end if dad dies before her.

How is this protecting our inheritance?
Does anyone know anything about the law on this?
I feel totally betrayed. I have a young son who now has no grandma, and she'd be devastated to know that everything she worked for was essentially being given to a family of near-strangers and not protected for her children and grandchild.

Feeling hopeless and hurt.

Could be so much worse.

After saying all our lives that DB and I would inherit his house, that had been my nana's my dad (with Alzheimers) changed his sole ownership to joint with his wife, and we got nothing. Not even a token memento.

A quarter of a million pound house is still £250,000. Cribbing that that isn't enough is appalling.

If your house is joint tenants it automatically goes to the other owner. You can't leave it in a will.
The house needs to be tenants in common to do this

Please don't waste your time and energy being resentful about money you did not, or might not inherit. All inheritance is a lottery. Focus on your own life and what you personally can do to make it better for yourself and your child.

That can still happen if you remarry
You can still write a will leaving everything to your kids
New spouse would only get it if there was no will or if the will said that or if the house was joint tenants.

So your dad is investing 700k in the house but only leave £125k each to you and your brother respectively, at today's prices?

Have you asked him why?

Not just her dads, half belonged to her mum.

Inheritance is often a game of pure chance. I have benefitted hugely from free accommodation in a beautiful holiday location because man died unexpectedly. Wife inherited. Wife dies unexpectedly, her cousin inherited, ( her husbands family inherited exactly nothing, although they might have expected several millions if he had left a will) the cousin died (third death in a year in this story) - he was separated from his wife, but she still inherited, and divided the lot among her children, including my friend, who acquired a villa, from the family of her estranged fathers cousins husbands family - who she never met and in fact had never heard of.

That is how it goes! The op should be assuming she will inherit nothing, she is likely to inherit nothing, and she should plan her life accordingly

But her mum died leaving no will that ring fenced money for her children. So it’s not hers anymore, it’s her dad’s.

If people don’t make provisions then money doesn’t go where you want it to.

But she left it to him, so it’s now his.

If you are left 1/4 and your dad dies before his new partner then your names will go on the deeds.
If she needs care it is the other 3/4 that will be liable to pay for her care. Your 1/4 is protected as you own that 1/4 not the new partner.
unless there is a caveat in the will

As an aside
Be aware if while owning 1/4 of a property you do not live in you may be liable to second property tax @ 2% of the total value of your own property that you buy whilst owning part of your dads.
Also be aware you will have to pay CGTax on the sale on that 1/4 as you don’t live there

Ultimately it is your dads money to do with as he pleases. The fact others will inherit more is irrelevant.

Just to say, as hurtful as it is, what someone puts in their will and leaves as inheritance is entirely up to them, you just can't expect anything at all, so anything you do recieve is a bonus.

My mum died when I was in my teens and my dad sold our family home within months and remarried within two years. I'm glad he found happiness, and indeed they were together till he died in his eighties, but he changed his will just before he was hospitalised with dementia and his wife was left everything, with my siblings and I barely being able to see him after they'd married.
Pretty sure my mum would have been heartbroken how it ended but legally not something we could do anything about.
I know it's hurtful and you feel betrayed but it's up to him how he distributes his estate.

Yes I want my dcs to have an inheritance from me.. but perhaps I'd feel differently if they felt entitled to it and prioritised it over my happiness in old age.

I have enormous sympathy for what it sounds like op endured in her childhood, but money isn't going to make up for that.

That’s true…
Also I’m betting that if any major repairs are needed OP would have to find 1/4 too

@Maray1967 I’m very sorry to read this. This is why I intend that part of my share of the house will go to our DC with DH having a life interest in the house . When sold they get their ££.
What if he just wants to move house? Will he be stuck in a massive house with too much upkeep because if he sells he will only have half the equity to buy a new place?

I would have thought if he puts half the house in trust for his 2 kids, if he dies first and she has to go into care she can only use her half of the house sale proceeds to go towards care, the other half (his half) will go into the trust. This is how my dads trust is set up. Every time my mum sells up any equity released is half hers and half goes into the trust for me and my half siblings x

Your mum could have protected your inheritance. She could have left her estate on trust for your dad for his lifetime, then to you. She chose to give it to your dad to deal with as he pleased, and that's what he's doing.

I'm sorry for your loss but please don't be bitter about this.

If you hate your dad so much then go NC with him and write off a potential inheritance.

Legally yes, but morally no.

My friend's DF left their mum, married his secretary and had a child with her. He always told friend and her DB that his estate would be split between his 3 children, with 2nd wife having a life interest. He was very rich, so we're talking about an estate worth at least a few mill.

When he died, friend and her brother got fuck all. They went to see a solicitor about challenging it, but were told it would be hugely costly and that their chances of success were 50/50 at best.

there isn't much you can do

our mum died many years ago - we always thought dad was the sensible one! He ended up giving away a load of his money to bogus good causes (one 'church' group were seen all driving around in mercedes benz after he had finished donating to them) and spending it all on ridiculous things. I was never bargaining on getting anything from him but I know my mum would have been really upset at him being so wasteful. Unfortunately for us all, from being a very well off man, he got tricked by a con artist woman and gave the rest of his money to her and is now a pauper and we are buying his food monthly for him. God forbid he needs care home costs as I don't know what we will do then as he has nothing and lives in a country where there is no state aid.

if you say anything you'll be perceived as meddling so I would just stay out of it! At least he sounds like he is getting something for his money !

If you are expecting the money as a form of sorry for his abuse move on. My MIL ran around her narcissistic mother until the day she died waiting for a sorry/thank you. It never came. He won't treat you any different in death than life.

It’s your father’s money, not yours start thinking about how your father can enjoy the rest of his life, rather than the cold cash you’ll get when he ultimately dies.

Honestly, if I were your father, I just spend or give away the money, rather than leave it in a will.

Please note
If you are in the uk
If both your parents owned the property and as your mum died without a will

Her estate does not all go to your dad. That’s not how it works

Her half of the house is split 50% to your dad and 50% to her children. So you and your sibling inherit 1/4 of your mums estate on her death and your dad has to give you that money now or put your names on the deeds of his and your mums existing house to the value of 1/4 of the house.

We ve had this with family members dieing intestate. It’s uk law
Talk to a solicitor OP sounds like your dads pulling a fast one.

.

We don't know why OP's mum didn't do this so try not to judge. Many people die intestate or with the wrong arrangements in place because they keep putting things off, are being financially abused or controlled, die unexpectedly, trust their partner to do the right thing etc etc.

DH and I have wills that are nearly 30 years old. We've left everything to each other. It's on my 'list' to get them redone and make sure that neither of us can disinherit our dcs if we remarry. The fact that we haven't got round to it yet doesn't mean I don't want my dcs to inherit my half of our estate!!

He would need to leave it directly to you and your brother giving his partner a right to remain in the property after her death.
If he leaves it to her with only a request that you and your brother inherit on her death then she could easily change it.
How much of an open conversation can you have with him. Sadly that's the only way to go but having read your post I would urge you do as other have suggested and expect nothing then be surprised if you get something.
There is absolutely no point getting worked up about this as in the long run its only you that feel the impact of this concern. Inheritance is never guaranteed. Family change their minds all the time