AIBU to be annoyed my hair has been damaged before I’m about to give birth. Also worrying about how I’ll still manage my self care routine to keep me sane and in a good headspace after baby is born?

[NewbieToThis]

Silly post I know and with worse going on in the world I shouldn’t allow myself to get annoyed about my hair being partly fried with bleach damage before I’m about to have my baby next month but I am. I love my hairdresser she does an amazing job getting my hair as blonde as it is but I think because I’ve had it bleached/highlighted so many times during this pregnancy (and the first 3 times by a different hairdresser) and because the high lift colour was pulled through to the ends to get rid of dull blonde the last time I had it done which was last week parts of my hair have had it. I’ve had several inches cut off my hair during the times I’ve got my hair lightened which is fine but I’m going to need at least 2 inches cut off next time I have my roots done right before my baby is born. I’ve ordered olaplex no 3 to help build my hair back up. I plan on still just having my roots done but nothing done to the ends. I’m just annoyed as my baby is due and I’m worried how I’ll still have the time to do my self care to help my mental health. I have a very supportive husband and good people around but I’m the type of person who overthinks and thinks I’ll not get the time. My appearance being bad really affects my mental health so I’m praying the olaplex treatments do the trick and that extra two inches gets rid of a lot of it. My hair is shoulder blade length.

I know I’m going to get a lot of people telling me to go back my natural colour but my natural colour is disgusting and because I’m not naturally pretty I need a bright colour to perk my complexion up. I know a lot of people will say I’ll not care when baby is here but I know myself that I will. What should I do?

If you haven't read all the OP's other threads, I suggest you do before making what is essentially a simplistic comment.

Thanks. What did she say? It got deleted before I had a chance to read it. X

try not to worry too much you can find time. I was pregnant during Covid and the hairdressers were closed , I couldn’t get my hair done for about 6 months by the time the baby was born, and the person who did it last before Covid hit did a bad job, it was a horrible shade. My roots were shocking I still cringe when I see the hospital pics 😂. The hairdressers re opened when the baby was a few weeks old. I was breastfeeding but expressed milk so that I could go to the hairdressers , I was determined to get it done as it was driving me mad. It was a great feeling getting it done in the end !

RTFT. The OP is going to put her child in care if she doesn't get enough time to make her YouTube videos, or he upsets her dogs. This is not about haircare.

@nothingcomestonothing thanks for flagging I have just read the whole post now and did not realise how much it had escalated.

Anyone who has done any CBT at all will be able to see a tick list of the types of "broken thinking" here, particularly catastrophising. I would strongly urge the OP to show these posts to her midwife, because honestly, this is the quickest time yo get help with MH.

She's started another thread, about how quickly she'll get her figure back after the delivery.

@TheShellBeach I did comment on that one that ultimately it didn’t matter, all the other posters indulged her with stories of snapping back into shape in 2 weeks 🙄

I know. It's pathetic.

But genuine question – why is it so hard to accept there are just awful parents who aren't fit to be parents? Crudely speaking, anyone can get knocked up. Why must all women be good mothers by default, by virtue of being female?

OP thinks nothing of vaping during pregnancy bc she's jealous of her friend. It's all me, me, my emotions, very little about the baby's wellbeing. (Fyi I know someone who drank heavily during pregnancy also for jealousy/spite reasons, baby came out with fetal alcohol syndrome and now it's about what a saint the mother is for taking care of such a child!)

The baby sleeps in another room bc she wants to sleep with the dogs.

She literally said foster care was a way for her to take a break (eg so she can do her Youtube videos.....).

Well, after a few rounds of treating them like a daycare, social services may take the baby off her hands permanently to solve her problem. The existence of social services does show there are unfit parents.

These are just a few examples out of many she has volunteered! Some people are just vapid, self-interested humans who shouldn't be taking care of another human, sadly...