AIBU naive about what a year 9 party looks like?

[Pandadunks]

DD has a friendship grp where we are also good friends with the parents. Kids are all Year 9 so age 13/14.
One kid has been invited to a house party at a school friends place, and has been told they can bring a few guests.
Our DD can’t go anyway, but the other parents were discussing this and a couple have said yes - their child can go even though they don’t know the parents of the boy throwing the party, and don’t know anyone else invited.
2 Parents have said no way because they don’t know the family etc and that the party will just be a load of teens smoking, vaping, taking drugs and drinking.

I said - there’s no way they’d be taking drugs at a party at that age and everyone laughed! Apparently because we live in a city OF COURSE the kids will be smoking weed, taking ketamine and god knows what else at a party!

Am I just horribly out of touch? DD is on the young side and hasn’t been to any parties at all that aren’t pizza restaurant or cinema for a birthday type thing.

YANBU - they’re too young, at 13/14 they’ll barely have alcohol there

YABU - you’re naive! It’ll be full on drugs, and everything else

Yes but the posters saying THEY were having sex and doing drugs and 13/14.....there's a lot of them.i suspect most mean14....going on 15. Not 13 in Y8.

That is such a sad tale. Very close to me. Hard to predict these things. Middle class nice area. Went to a desirable catholic school. Sounds like a group of lads experimenting for fun. And one ends up dead at age 14

That’s every parents nightmare 😕

By march at least half of the kids will be 14, so it seems a bit random to be understanding it might happen at 15 but not 6 months earlier....?

I agree with the posters that said teen parties are as varied as adult parties- you could be completely out and they'll be having a skins style rave or the other parents could be completely wrong and it will be board games and cups of tea.

I went to both types at 14!