To not be a guarantor for my sister

[PinkShimmerSparkle]

Even though this means they and their 3 children might become homeless.
My DSis and her DH are not fantastic with money, I always assumed that they made sure that bills, mortgage etc were paid and all their nights out and their regular purchases of new technology, holidays etc were bought from disposable income but in hindsight it is obvious that they were always spending beyond their means, this is none of my business and I absolutely would never get involved or say anything.
They have both been working until recently when her DH left his job, she tells me that they have missed one mortgage payment and have now been issued an eviction notice.
They are looking at renting but everything requires a guarantor and she has asked me and DH to be one, as she knows we both earn and can save every month, but this is only because we are careful with what we spend.
I have said no but feel bad that they might become homeless.
AIBU?

You don't get an eviction notice from the bank after missing one payment. The process takes months and months, they must have been burying their heads in the sand about this for a long time

You can't be evicted if you're a home owner, and I doubt their mortgage company would start legal proceedings over 1 missed payment either. So either they've missed a lot more than one payment or there's something else going on.

Either way YANBU to say no to being a guarantor.

No way, unless you want to pay their rent!

You are definitely not being unreasonable, sounds like they've brought this on themselves. I wouldn't be guarantor for anyone apart from my child

From shelters website

https://england.shelter.org.uk/housing_advice/repossession/how_to_deal_with_missed_mortgage_payments

op, I'd tell your sister to get in touch with some debt charities and start working out repayment plans

Do not do it.
My close friend did for her brother and it wiped out her savings.

Nobody gets an eviction notice after missing one mortgage payment.

In fact I don't think they can issue one until they've been to court for an order of possession which isn't a quick process. I'd estimate they've missed closer to 12 months worth of payments to be honest.

So no, definitely don't be a guarantor. I have no doubt it will be the financial ruin of you, especially as your sister has already mentioned you and DH save money each month. She's already hinting here she won't be paying the rent but you guys can cover it.

You don't get 'evicted' for one missed payment. Something else is going on there, that's a big red flag for me. No.

Given that she is not being honest with you about what’s happening and the process, no. Don’t trust her.

I would never be a guarantor for anyone.
I once watched a bailiff programme where parents had been guarantors for their eldest daughter (they had younger children at home too) and the bailiffs showed up to take all their stuff as eldest daughter had stopped paying rent. They rang eldest daughter and she was horrible and just said something to the effect of ‘not my problem, it’s your debt now!’ And hung up!

The younger siblings were crying saying ‘she always does this! She ruins everything’ it was a bloody horrible watch and I always felt so sad for that family.

You can love your family members and obviously want to help them but not at the sacrifice of your own security.

If they are homeless, they should contact their LA. It's not your responsibility to worry about housing adults who seem incapable of managing their finances, regardless of their relation to you. I protect my family with all I have but the most I would offer them in this situation is signposting to legal advice, jobcentre for the husband and a couple of weeks on my couch to sort themselves out.

Bank's do not issue eviction notices for one missed payment.

She is mistaken or lying.

Absolutely do not go guarantee for anyone who is bad with money. There are several other ways to support her but not this one.

Given that she has been feckless with her future security don't give her chance to do the same to yours...

if she can't pay her mortgage she won't be able to pay rent either and will expect you to do it. Absolutely no way I would do this.

i remember this one TruJay, agree it was heartbreaking, especially the phone call.

Thank you, I just needed to be told I am doing the right thing.
I have told her to seek advice and double checked that it’s definitely an eviction notice and not a payment reminder letter or something, we have never missed a payment so don’t know how it works.
I am definitely sure this has been going on for a while as what they have been spending we can’t afford to do and our earnings are higher, we do live in a slightly more expensive area than them though.
I can’t offer then somewhere to stay as we don’t have space and we live many hours drive from them.

Yanbu.

It can get very expensive indeed. Even if you did want to help financially it'd probably be less risky just to pay the rent.

she tells me that they have missed one mortgage payment and have now been issued an eviction notice.

That sounds untrue. I wouldn’t sign a guarantor agreement with anyone that is lying to me.

YANBU at all. And she’s lying about the “eviction”. That’s a load of bollocks.

Do you have parents she’s going to try to involve as you’ve said no?

I’d say no on the very simple basis that being a guarantor means you’d have a commitment to pay their rent for them and since they’ve defaulted on a mortgage payment the current risk of that isn’t one that you can want to take on. Tell them you will never be willing and able to pay two lots of rent / mortgage in one month so they are asking for a promise you cannot honour.

Good point.

It takes A LOT for a house to be repossessed. Probably at least 6 months non payment and a court hearing etc. It takes ages. If they can't afford the house, they need to sell. Not advisable to be a guarantor, they are bad with Money. They need to go to the council

It really was heartbreaking wasn’t it?! 😔

I remember thinking gosh if I had the money I would have tracked them down and cleared the debt for them. They were just an average family trying to get by and wanted to help their daughter never thinking it would end up the way it did.

Any guarantor should understand the contract they are legally agreeing.

Only sign if you a) have the means to pay their rent on top of your own bills and b) are prepared to never see that money again.

If they actually are being evicted it's likely that they've missed at least 6 months of repayments and not engaged in negotiations with the bank.

You are not getting the full story here. You can't risk your own financial stability based on a lie.