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AIBU?

To make DD return stolen item?

189 replies

Coffeehelpsmebemum · 05/02/2024 12:49

We stayed in a hotel recently. I've since found that my DD (autistic DD) has taken (stolen) one of the hotel room key cards even though it says that they need to be returned when checking out as they are reused for future customers/guests. DD says that she kept it because she "likes it" and "wants to keep it". I think she should return it/post it back to the hotel but DH says I'm "overreacting" because it is just a hotel room key card. AIBU to make DD return this stolen item?

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

574 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
66%
You are NOT being unreasonable
34%
HarrietPierce · 05/02/2024 16:26

DillyDilly · Today 16:19

"I’m wondering if this thread is real?"

Me too. It's bizarre!

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PhoenixStarbeamer · 05/02/2024 16:26

You're going to post it back apologising?! They'll think you're cruel OP. Seriously they have LOADS of them.

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DillyDilly · 05/02/2024 16:27

And are we really to believe that the Beverley Hills Hotel demands that keys are returned !

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PhoenixStarbeamer · 05/02/2024 16:29

Coffeehelpsmebemum · 05/02/2024 14:33

Yes I am but I believe strongly that DD needs to understand that stealing is not ok.

You're just being nasty now OP this is actually nuts. Poor DD.

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Mitsky · 05/02/2024 16:30

If taking a hotel room key home with you is stealing then I should expect to be raided by the police at any moment for my unintentional collection over the years!

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sunnydays8 · 05/02/2024 16:35

I can't believe you've actually gone in her room and taken it. Poor girl, you won't end up with a good relationship with her.

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Mitherations · 05/02/2024 16:37

Sneaking into her room to take it when she's out and then lying to her isn't the best plan you've had this decade either OP.

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FreyafromLondon · 05/02/2024 16:40

My daughter works at reception in a hotel and she just told me they have hundreds of key cards. It not a big deal

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DamnSpots · 05/02/2024 16:46

SpringSparrow · 05/02/2024 14:59

You are being ridiculous. Honestly let her have the card. I can’t believe you are laminating a photo of it.

A shit blurry photo in the dark at that...

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SkulkHollow · 05/02/2024 17:07

I think this is a complete non-event.

The hotel will not miss it or charge for it. The returned keycards will go into a big bucket to get reused, they will not be checking each card to make sure every single one is returned. They will know that people forget to return them, they cost pennies, it's more effort to check/chase up on lost ones than it is to just replace them over time.

DD didn't really think it was stealing. Have a bit of a word with her that stealing is, of course, wrong but beyond that then just let her keep it.

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ElitebookBang · 05/02/2024 17:10

Thank you for showing us the name of the hotel. That was important.

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BringOnFebBankHoliday · 05/02/2024 17:11

BumpheadParrotfish · 05/02/2024 15:12

Stealth boast thread.

Yep! Otherwise why do we need a photo of the Beverly Hills Hotel room key card?

I can't believe the number of people on this thread that have said.... watch out! Next thing you know she'll be stealing sweets, then god knows what...cars ...

This thread is so frustrating! It's a key card ffs 🙄

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ElitebookBang · 05/02/2024 17:13

A hotel in Europe, charged my teenager €5 when she lost the key card!

yes it’s not great to steal intentionally. But I am not sure that your daughter will have learned a lesson by you doing what you did. I also feel like it’s an unnecessary waste of a letter travelling across the Atlantic in order to prove a point now.

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YoureALizardHarry11 · 05/02/2024 17:15

Ok, I was on your side initially until I realised you wanted to post a piece of plastic abroad, and then I saw you wanted to take a picture and laminate it, then you took a photo of the key card and posted it. Fucking weird behaviour 🤣 either this isn’t a real story or you’re not the full ticket yourself.

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onlythebrave3 · 05/02/2024 17:17

Coffeehelpsmebemum
This is utterly ridiculous. You've said your daughter has got to 14 and never stolen and she thought you could keep the key card, so she didn't even have the intention to steal? I'm astounded you can go from this to her needing a hard lesson or she'll be shoving stock up her top in Primark. There's a huge difference.

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IHopeYouStepOnALegPiece · 05/02/2024 17:19

Coffeehelpsmebemum · 05/02/2024 14:23

I've got the key card out of her room now. I can understand she wants a souvenir from the hotel so what I have done is taken these photos of the key card and I will laminate them for her to keep so that she still has a sounvnir from the hotel after the key card has been sent back. DH doesn't agree with me but at least I'm trying to teach DD that stealing isn't ok.

But now your technically lying to her so is lying ok when it suits but taking a hotel key card is punishable?

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hereforthetea · 05/02/2024 17:22

Who knew key cards with a gateway drug.

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XiCi · 05/02/2024 17:29

sunnydays8 · 05/02/2024 16:35

I can't believe you've actually gone in her room and taken it. Poor girl, you won't end up with a good relationship with her.

That's without factoring in that her dd is autistic so likely to be distressed at a possession being taken from her room and thrown away. Sometimes people's behaviour is just unfathomable. OPs husband and most of this thread have told her she's being ridiculous but no her daughter Must Be Taught A Lesson

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Smellslikesummer · 05/02/2024 17:43

I completely agree OP, also it is best to make your point with a key card than not say anything and have to handle it later when (if) she does it again with something of a higher value.

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LE987 · 05/02/2024 17:44

Regardless of whether the ‘hotel’ has loads or not you can’t just take something just because you want it which is what OPs DD needs to learn. I wouldn’t post it back as that’s just crazy but I wouldn’t let DD keep it either.

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ComfortableAtLastTookLongEnough · 05/02/2024 17:47

I am not even sure if this is real anymore.

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SlightlygrumpyBettyswaitress · 05/02/2024 17:56

I have zillions of them!
Take a chill pill

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BlueGrey1 · 05/02/2024 18:04

It’s a hotel key card, the hotel has hundreds as they are cheap, they quite often need replacing anyway as they malfunction, let her keep it as a momento, a lot of people accidentally take these home in their bags

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Iusedtoliveinsanfrancisco · 05/02/2024 18:10

I think your instincts are right if your daughter is able, I would get her to put it in the envelope and to write the address and to post it back rather than do it for her

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Galatine · 05/02/2024 18:12

Your fourteen year old has stolen something, (the value is irrelevant), and you are arguing the toss with her about retiring it? Try being the parent that you should be and make her return it, or take it from her and return it yourself.
The fact that she is autistic has nothing to do with it. she still needs to learn right from wrong!

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