Irks me to see mums boasting about "childfree" nights out & "kid free weekends away"

[Bridgetjoneski]

I just find it very distasteful! I have one or two mum friends on insta & know them in real life. But at least every fortnight they have insta posts up about "kid free" night out with dh or "kid free weekend away". They are quite wealthy & both work full time, I just find it very unsavoury. Tag a dinner your hubby but no need to state the kids absense.
Is this a rising trend or just limited to the pair I know? The latest status tagging the latest dinner out was "not a child in sight"...

😂😂😂

Woman who has the day free 5 days a week to do yoga and Pilates whilst either her partner or society (or both) fund her lady of leisure lifestyle, criticises a hard working woman for enjoying the same freedom once a fortnight...

I think we’re established you are reading too much into it.

Do you think that makes you a better parent than the rest of us? Does it mean you love your kids more?

No......it doesn't. Saying out loud that you enjoy some kids free time doesn't mean you think your kids a burden. It's just that you like a break every now and then.

Your posts are dripping with judgement. I find that crass and distasteful.

Probably because you have so much time without them while you get to do things for yourself!

You think it's crass. I do not think it's crass. Most people on this thread don't think it's crass. Because most people on this thread understand that for the vast bulk of parents, especially mothers, child-free (and work free) time is pretty rare and frankly, amazing.

Woman who has the day free 5 days a week to do yoga and Pilates whilst either her partner or society (or both) fund her lady of leisure lifestyle, criticises a hard working woman for enjoying the same freedom once a fortnight...

Yep. It's really shitty.

No one cares though other than you! No one cares what you're doing with your time when your kids are at school. No one else cares whether you hashtag your posts with #toomuchtimeonmyhands or whatever. Because the type of women with lives, like the ones you mention are too busy with their lovely husbands having a nice time sans kids than to give a shit about your envy!

I work 13 hour shifts to pay the mortgage and, around that, largely due to considerable guilt of not always being around, I devote 100% of my free time to my DC. I’ve not been swimming or yoga or brunch for months. The day DH and I go out for a meal just the 2 of us I will bask in it and quite frankly I won’t care to what people like you think. You don’t know you are bloody born not working with school aged DC. Oh and btw, working parents are still ‘full time’ as well.

“Not a child in sight”? Yay!! If you’ve spent £££ on a babysitter and a nice meal out you do not want other people’s children - especially badly-behaved ones - in your eyeline.

Reminds me of a hen do I attended at a spa. Someone thought the rules did not apply to her and brought her toddler along. It wasn’t that she didn’t have childcare, she thought that dcs should go wherever a parent wanted and that we , other mothers, didn’t love our dcs as much as she did.

Society or DH doesn't fund me. It's a lifestyle choice for me & DH for me to stay at home to prioritise our family. I have my own savings, pension & investments which is more than many women working 40 hours per week. And DH can afford to fund our family unit but I have my own financial independence too which I built & worked very hard for during my childfree days!

Look, social media is all a bit crass, that’s sort of the point. Announcing you’re kid free is no more crass than saying you’re having time with your “famalam”, “hot chocolate with this one”, “making memories”, “living your best life” etc etc. It 100% doesn’t mean you hate the kids or wish they had never been born! If you can’t cope with it without the levels of judgement you seem to have, best not to bother.

Surely the reason you don't rejoice in childfree time js because you have so much of it OP?

Most of us, certainly all the mums I know, are either working their guts out for their employers bottom line, or churning through the unrelenting House and childcare tasks (which you obviously have too). Literally none of my mum friends are doing multiple classes and activities for themselves during the week. Sadly.

I think if you don't like seeing your friends having moments of happiness, you are best off hiding them on your socials.

Only someone with so much time to themselves could consider that someone carving out 1 to 3 hours of time for themselves in between full time work and full time parenting to be an issue - keep on enjoying your brunches and gym classes and breakfasts out - but please consider that not all of us are lucky enough to have that much leisure time!

And say that working mums should see their at work time as "childfree time".

The issue here is that you don't get it (because you have plenty of childfree time) and instead of accepting you just don't get it and moving on, you've decided to be all judgy about it.

Well it appears you are in the minority. You do you.

I imagine the women posting it like me are validating, acknowledging or celebrating their embracing balance.

I work full-time, care for my mum and have two children. Time with my partner, or groups of girlfriends is a small space where I am responsible for only me and can do as I please.

I very occasionally pop a pic up but it's usually a few friends who span ages 60-30 some of who are only now taking time for themselves and they are damn well gonna document it for those that follow .

That’s because you have all day without your children to do yoga and your nails.

Do you have a cleaner?

Am v confused by this. There are surely much worse things to be offended by?

It comes as no surprise to my dc that dh and I are enjoying something without them as they clearly can see they are being babysat.

It's not like they are going to dig out Insta posts from 15 years ago and say "fucking hell, mum and dad went out a lot didn't they? We never knew"

You're a hero op, totaly financially independent despite not having a job, the perfect stay at home mum, you find time to judge other mums and you love your kids more than absolutely everyone in the world....

If only we could all be like you 🤔

I don't understand why you care.

I'm a lone parent with barely any family, have been for 15 years. I didn't have any "kid free" time for years and years until he got older. I'm not arsed what others do though.

@pootlin where did I mention getting my nails done? I do my own nails
No I don't have a cleaner as I am well able to keep on top of the day to day running of my house plus the dc are also on a rota of household chores (they do max 20 mins a day) & it enables the house to stay in shape. No cleaner required.

Wow OP stop! You're not doing yourself any favours here at all!!!

Well I was working for 18 years before the dc came along & was able to make smart choices along the way. I also recieved a small inheritance in my 20s which I was able to invest. I also have the option to return to my career if I want to at some point.

Bit late to stop I think!