Irks me to see mums boasting about "childfree" nights out & "kid free weekends away"

[Bridgetjoneski]

I just find it very distasteful! I have one or two mum friends on insta & know them in real life. But at least every fortnight they have insta posts up about "kid free" night out with dh or "kid free weekend away". They are quite wealthy & both work full time, I just find it very unsavoury. Tag a dinner your hubby but no need to state the kids absense.
Is this a rising trend or just limited to the pair I know? The latest status tagging the latest dinner out was "not a child in sight"...

I'm having a child free weekend with a friend in April and yes with us both being the parents of SEN children (which means we don't get to do very much without our children) we are very much billing it as child free.
I mean we're not doing the most exciting activities to most people, we're running a race, going out clubbing and just going to enjoy not being at everyone's beck and call

I'm beginning to think OP is on a wind up, nobody IRL that I know thinks this and I have some amazing Mum friends.

Most elderly parents who require care have medical or health needs and can cause a lot of pressure, so most people are unlikely to give those ## which you suggest, purely because it's not light hearted.

However, kids can be irritating and annoying by their own admission, so it's just lighthearted!l to escape for a night or holiday.

@firef1y that sounds lovely, fun weekend. Enjoy your well deserved break xx

OP Is not listening.

Most young adults who are close to their parents would not give a shit about these hashtags
And quite frankly, theirs is the only opinion that matters.

So do many children @cocktailanddreams . Many children have complex needs either visible or invisible which require a great deal of parental & outside care. Both children & our elderly are vulnerable sectors of society.

Does anyone else have this Blueu episode go through their mind when reading this thread.

NO KIDS ALLOWED!!!

😂

Ps: I've marked it sensitive in case it overly irks the OP. Everyone else will be fine.

@Bridgetjoneski
Yes I'm very aware thank you, I'm a sen teacher. You're very patronising and generally have no clue how people feel about their own lives.

Has no one here ever had a joke with the nannies/childminders at soft play on a Friday afternoon that they're the lucky ones as they'll be able to hand the kids back for the weekend in a few hours?

@cocktailanddreams well if that were the case you would realise that sen or other disabilities do not discriminate & affect ALL sectors in society. I was merely pointing that out as you said that "most elderly parents who require care have medical or health needs" which is why an #elderlyparentfreezone hashtag would be unlikely.
I'm merely stating many kids also have underlying illnesses, visible or invisible disabilities or other physical or cognitive disabilities.

Exactly!

Everything in context. What about wine as teachers gifts for 'putting up with my child'. No one offended...

Its not a sin to nurture your spouse.
As my mother always said : " The Kids will grow up and Leave.".

( and in a lot of cases, as you grow older FORGET YOU EXIST!!!)

@Bridgetjoneski Seriously OP, if I was your child I would be more offended about the fact that you wished your children were as great as the "perfect middle class" family you were fawning over, than a childfree hashtag during a dinner out.

Vonesk
That's so true. How often on here do we find people are glued to their children for years, drift into parent roommates territory, have no hobbies or interests outside their children and when the children leave home they realise they've got no interests of their own and their romantic relationship has gone stale?

Goldbar I suspect most of us have. Grandparents enjoy reminding us that the best part of being a grandparent is handing them back at the end of the day.

Coming back to the thread I think for me the thing that seems weird to me is the social media posting side of it. I don't understand why the focus of a post about date night or seeing friends needs to have an emphasis on not having children with you because it's not that big a deal. On reflection I think that's because I'm not a big poster on social media so it's a "you do you" thing. If talking about being child free for a couple of hours makes someone else happy, it's not a big deal.

Don't see the issue with enjoying a child free evening.
I love my son and would give my life for his if it came to it, but let's be honest childcare is tedious and if you spend 24/7 in parent mode you would go crazy.
Everyone needs time away from their kids/with their friends or partner.
We used to be a tribal society remember.

Id be lying if I said I didn’t do this. Don’t see the issue my kids maybe have a sleepover once a month at their grandparents. They love it, my parents love it and th quality time is perfect for me and my husband. My child n aren’t neglected with love and care just because I have the odd child free time.
p.s we went abroad for 5 nights in the summers child free.

Again no problem with people enjoying a night out without the kids. I enjoy nights out without mine too. It's the #childfree #childless #nosprogsallowed tags & captions I find abrasive not parents enjoying time out which is well deserved by all! It's the hashtagging!!!!

Why would anyone be posting #elderlyparentfreezone? That's just weird.
My parents are just my parents. I don't call them my 'elderly parents' And #parentfreezone wouldn't make sense because if I'm there, it's not a #parentfreezone 🙄

Oh I accept that, but
a) a lot of people are missing that point altogether (“just because I enjoy x doesn’t mean I don’t love y” - but emphasising that you’re enjoying x is not the same as emphasising that you are free from y)
b) we don’t talk about the other people in our lives in quite the same way. You never see the hashtags #partnerfree, #siblingfree, #friendfree, #parentfree…
a) Not so much missing the point, just having no issue with emphasising that they (I'm) free from y. Because it's true and sometimes it's the best bit
b) Those 'other people' don't depend/rely on me for their wellbeing. I'm not reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar 100x to my sibling or having to keep my friend nourished and clothed and content The comparison doesn't really work 🤷‍♀️

Good God get a life OP

I think maybe you’re a bit bored, OP. Can you get an extra Pilates session in during the day? 😂

Well you have obviously/hopefully realised that you are in the minority in thinking how you do.

I also agree about the Grandparents saying they can hand them back. If a child has been raised by a stable loving family they aren't going to think their Grandparents don't like them.

Again, get a life.

Blimey, who made you the hashtag police? It’s entirely up to the individual how they express their time away from their kids and I also think you are massively overstating the hurt their children will feel if they ever saw their posts, given we are raising a generation of internet literate youngsters who are far more savvy about hashtagging than we’ll ever be. They’ll know it’s just a creative expression for a night out and not a slur as you seem so intent on seeing it as. Plus, as other PP have said, I have never seen anyone with children refer to themselves as childfree because it’s widely accepted now that’s the preferred term for adults who don’t have children, rather than childless.

Being less sanctimonious would also be nice 😬