Irks me to see mums boasting about "childfree" nights out & "kid free weekends away"

[Bridgetjoneski]

I just find it very distasteful! I have one or two mum friends on insta & know them in real life. But at least every fortnight they have insta posts up about "kid free" night out with dh or "kid free weekend away". They are quite wealthy & both work full time, I just find it very unsavoury. Tag a dinner your hubby but no need to state the kids absense.
Is this a rising trend or just limited to the pair I know? The latest status tagging the latest dinner out was "not a child in sight"...

@ManhattanNY

🙌👏

@Bridgetjoneski read this! 👆

And what hashtags other people use isn’t any of your business.

Your obsession with other people and how they live and comment is odd.

Edit for incorrect predictive spellings.

Not just you.

Okay let me break it down for you:

For you, being child free and getting self directed time is an every day thing; you have 6 hours a day whilst your children are at school to dick around, then you have what sounds like several hours an evening whilst your husband ferries your kids about to dick around too. In fact, it actually sounds like you should maybe hashtag the very tiny amount of time you actually spend with the fruit of your loin as #actuallywithmykidsforonce; since actually being with them is fairly unusual for you.

However; for us working parents; we don’t get to dick around all day. We are working. Then we come home and cram what you have all day to do sans children into an evening; but with the added complication of having our children present too.

Working parents don’t get to fanny about at yoga or whatever; because our free time is all spent with our children, whereas your free time is truly free; and you get at least 30 extra hours of it every week.

For working parents; a few child free hours is a rare treat. It’s something to celebrate. For you; it’s a daily thing.

Definitely not just you.

That depends on the language and the context and if you have enough other positive posts. I have this friend who always does these negative wordings like “thank god we are having a quiet night for ourselves with no kids in sight”… and no positive posts about the kids ever. If that’s the majority of your social media posts I do think you have a problem.

@0rangeCrush, your post is spot on. Thank you.

Well you’ve been posting pretty much non stop since 12 this afternoon on this post alone. So if you were looking for your Most Present and Attentive Mother award then I think you may be disappointed.

Your spelling of absence irks me

I remember having a conversation between mum's about booking summer activity camp for the kids. I didn't work but was going to do it - my kids loved to spend time out of the house in organised fun stuff with their friends.
This one mum piped up 'well I'd rather spend time with my kids rather than sending them off somewhere'. Right. Like you do realise not everyone has a live in housekeeper (I kid you not) so going out to get your hair done or just taking a long bath is no problem? It even without the help, time without the kids can be essential.
Kid free nights are great - so often couples neglect that all important relationship! Not sure why the need to say it on social media but so what.

You keep saying it’s crass to use the hashtag child free - why? As a mum who’s always worked 60+ hours a week I loved to occasional night out without our children. That doesn’t make me crass or not value my children - they’re 16 and 19 now and certainly don’t feel that. I really resent a SAHM preaching about ‘crassness” to others who are working hard and setting their children a great example. I’d much rather my children see this than me staying at home, going to yoga, living off my husband.

Except it seems that you are not contributing much to said team!

OP you've replied to this thread 83 times. Nothing is worth this much commitment on your part. Go have a break.

Don’t be ridiculous, she’s contributing to the family by carrying out “judgemental busybody” duties for them all.
And also keeping the local yoga business open.

FFS!

I went to Poland for a week WITHOUT MY KIDS, with Wim Hof.
I didn't tell people specifically that I was climbing mountains in swimwear WITHOUT MY KIDS, but I bet they realised.
I feel devastated to feel that I could potentially be judged.

She had brunch dammit, brunch. And some yoga. What more do you want?

You've really spent 4 pages arguing about this?

#lovemycrotchgoblins 🤣

@Bridgetjoneski read this!

It's so #right

I'm so sorry for your kids...their own mum thinks that they are not fun. In general children are so much fun ..maybe you are doing something wrong ;)

And a swim and a walk on the beach. Contributing to family life doesn’t get much harder than that!

Also remember OP worked so hard (plus the small inheritance) before she had children that she’s earned enough money to be financially independent and have investments worth more than the rest of us suckers who have worked full time for the whole of our lives (and spent more hours actually with our children than OP seems to have done despite being a SAHM).

Obvs we should all aspire to be OP who clearly has the moral high ground to critique women who dare to enjoy a night away from their children

I love child free holidays...also elderly mother free holidays too. I love both and dedicate most of my time to them the rest of the year.

However, I deserve a break, why not.
My DC will enjoy parent free holidays when older and also be delighted.

I skip all the way to the airport.
#makingmemorieshun

Okay AI

I suspect that them talking about being child free is less about them actually being without their children, and more about them being without any responsibilities.

I mean this with no disrespect, but if you haven’t been a working mum you won’t understand how it feels to constantly be in demand, your time never being your own. These women go to work all day and have the demands of work placed on them in that time. Then they come home and have all the demands of parenting, but squashed into a shorter period of time. Got to get the dinner ready, washing up done, homework supervised, kids bathed and into bed and somewhere in amongst all that you’re actually trying to connect with them properly too. Then when they’re in bed it’s catching up with all the chores and trying to squeeze in a wee bit of downtime for yourself before falling asleep on the sofa because you’re so bloody exhausted. And depending on the age of the kids maybe they’re also up half the night feeding and settling them when they wake. Mornings are a rush of getting kids up, dressed, fed, bags packed and off to school/nursery before heading to work yourself. And before you know it you’re back to being subject to the demands of the employer.

So yeah, if somewhere in amongst all that madness of constant pressure and demands these women get to spend a few hours every couple of weeks just stopping and being themselves, not having to run around after someone else and just take a moment to breath, then I can 100% understand why they would be grateful for that. Maybe if you walked a mile in their shoes you could too. And maybe you could even let them enjoy the experience without criticising them for how they express that.