To think if you can't handle the children you've got you should stop having kids?

[Absolutelybloomingflabbergasted]

I know this is subjective but, I wanted 3 kids and knew after 1 I wouldn't be able to handle a younger child and balance life effectively.

I'm sat on the train, and, this isn't the first occurrence.

A mother with 4 children, shouting at her baby, telling her she's naughty because she's upset and being a normal baby.

Yes, we all get stressed but she's blatantly lying to her, saying she needs to shut up as the train guards coming and doesn't want to hear her racket, threatening to throw her dummy in the bin for being bad. Saying she never should of taken them out, 'especially her' 'she's too bad to take out and always does this, she never learns and neither do I, next time she's staying home'

I understand parenthood is stressful, but now all the other kids are shouting at this poor child, who is still in a pram and looks no older than 1.5

I found toddlerhood the most stressful.

I understand pregnancy and children come unexpectedly but, I see this very frequently in my area, which is very poverty striken and there is not a great deal of support.

I feel so upset for this child.

I'm sick of seeing people having more children then they are phyiscally able to and then pretty much abusing them.

I came from a household that did similar and refuse to do this to not only myself but my children.

I know this will likely be conflicting but, I believe behaviour is echoed from the role model or parent, in general but especially in this case.

It makes me so sad.

I've not insulted you .. been rude or disrespectful..
I don't agree that you've done nothing about what you witnessed considering you feel so strongly about it ...

If you feel bad that's because you know you should have helped in some way .. and didn't.

Not because of anything I've said.

I'm shocked that so many pps are trying to come up with excuses for this nasty bullying mother.

Well no, as an adult woman having children she should really be capable of sorting out her oen contraception. Is that too much ti expect?
My head is fine thanks but yours might need a wobble as there are multiple pp's making comments along the lines of "Oh, maybe she's having a bad day" or the classic, "You don't know what her life is like...". None of that excuses shouting ongoing verbal abuse at a baby. So yes, these pp's arw excusing abuse. You think it's acceptable? In case you're not aware she is exposing all of her poor children to verbal and emotional abuse. The older children are already damaged so they joined in with berating the baby. God only knows how she treats these children at home.

@VanLife33 Apologies for including you if that's so.

I wanted to, I thought about it, I just didn't know how to go about it. Plus, no one else was blinking an eye, I assumed I was over sensitive and triggered.

I'm genuinely wondering if I make a 101 online report, anything would get looked into or raised.

I really don't think it's worth giving @Canthave2manycats any more energy.

I can't quite understand their logic here, but I also believe they are triggered in some way.

@Absolutelybloomingflabbergasted trust your instincts and do what you think will be best.
None of us were there, but it obviously upset you.
You have nothing to lose by making a report

What would you have wanted someone to do for your child self ?

You said your self if she's willing to behave like that in public what is she like behind closed doors...
We can all sit here and hope she was just having a bad day and has gone home and tucked her kids in to bed with a kiss

And hope she didn't follow through with her threat ..

Is there CCTV on the train? Police might be able to do something with that. The parent may even be known to them / social services. It might be a stretch, and I agree with all you’ve said. But maybe it’s worth making a report.

Pieces of a puzzle

OP I hear you and I absolutely agree with you - we have all had stressful days + moments were not proud of - but I think it’s a pretty low bar for someone to manage not to threaten their small child with physical violence in response to age appropriate toddler-ing.

I think we largely agree that all children should have equal access to a good quality of life. But how can we legislate for parent behaviour?

Can we have legal requirements that parents read to their children? Limit screen time? provide high quality + balanced nutrition? Provide a routine or schedule that supports good sleep habit? Model exercise as a part of life?

I hate seeing parenting situations like the one you witnessed today. I don’t know what the answer is - I want to live in a society where we have to license people to have children once they meet the threshold criteria - but sometimes it sounds like a really good idea…

🙄

Let's re-read OP's post but change it to the father taking the children on the train.

can you use a tissue to clean the window? ssssssssssschoooosh

I'm backing you @Absolutelybloomingflabbergasted. Please report this somewhere. Those children might need help. You can't say much or do much to women like that because you'll probably get a mouthful of abuse and i would worry that the kids might then suffer more as a result of a stranger intervening. Why are so many so called parents cruel to their flesh and blood that they chose to conceive and give birth to? It's sickening.

You need to tell the men that make them, not the women that actually do all the work rearing them. And tell them loudly and often until they do at least half the work women do too.

Your narrow little mind just cannot conceive that other posters might have a point, so you resort to, erm, abuse?

Double standards, methinks.

And you know that - how?!

Because you said it? ;)

total joke, please don't sue me

There are vile people… these people go on to have children. These children often (not always) grow up being vile adults who treat their children the same. Poverty is definitely one of the risk factors, level of education etc etc

@MumblesParty @Canthave2manycats I disagree that that was OP’s motivation for posting. But as it happens, on the basis of what she as told us (assuming it’s true), OP’s parenting is far superior to the woman on the train!

Thank you ❤️ not my intention at all but I appreciate your support! Restores my faith in humanity a little and courage to speak out.

But we all fucking agree? How does that help this child???

Jeez you are hilarious!!! No, I totally do not feel inferior - do you? God you sound about 12.

Not grasping what I and many other posters have said is on you.

BUT how was the OP going to do anything about it here other than denigrate the woman online to big herself up?!

I don't think it's worth giving you any more energy. You've been totally immature, made personal attacks when people don't agree with you!!

I am a 'she' by the way, not a 'they'.

You are something else!

Just because she should does not mean she will.

This thread is just utterly pointless.