…or is my childminder?

[Childminderwoes]

DS is 10 months and started with a childminder 6 weeks ago. 2 days a week so I can get various things done before my maternity leave ends in March, and full time hours when I go back.

He has a drop off/pick up time as you would expect but she’s very very very rigid about this. And will message to complain if you’re not there at the exact minute because she has other drops offs 5 minutes either side of his slot. To the extent where she’s messaged to complain about him being dropped off 2 or 3 minutes before or after his set time.

She wants me to text 2 minutes before arrival every time he’s dropped off, so she can come outside to collect him, and is very firm about this, and will again text if I forget to remind me for next time.

She wants him to be in the buggy at every drop off to minimise his distress at being ‘handed over’ which I understood for the first few weeks but it’s become a real pain getting the buggy out of the car, setting it up and strapping him in just to wheel him down her driveway.

She’s really lovely but after 5 weeks all of it is getting a bit much. I thought by now I would be able to just hand him over, as you would expect mornings are a bit mad as I also have a 4 year old to get to school. All these extra caveats are starting to grate on me a little.

To add to this I’m not too sure about his meals. He has lunch at hers, but never what I would call a proper lunch - the diary entry says things like bread sticks, toast, pouches, fruit. I suppose I expected he would have something a bit healthier and hot.

Is this normal for a childminder?

Do you mean ring if there are too many children or just do a what the hell let's make someone's life hell on a feeling?

This gave me chills. I hope she’s not still working as a child minder.

Wonder how long he stays in the buggy when he’s dropped off? I fear it will be a long time.

I Don't think the lunch thing is odd particularly, most of my friends childminders do hot meal at tea time and it's 'freezer tea' which isn't as good as what they get at nurseries.

Drop off is, what if you live longer than 2 minutes away. Presumably you leave the stroller incase they go out anyway and build it to leave outside or similar? It can be quite distressing foe a non walker to be passed to someone new. 2 days a week for 5 days isn't long to get to know each other.
You don't sound happy so move the child whilst you are still off to look around places

I know it's a bit different but when my boy was in nursery we could drop anytime between opening tien at 7:30am and 9am, as after that interrupted their activities, the not letting you in would make me feel uneasy

the lunches are a huge disappointment too. My son went to nursery so had proper hot meals, but toast/breadsticks/pouches isn’t something I expect many parents give at home on a daily basis either.

No, mine was really flexible. If she ended up working more hours then I'd be charged for it, it's only fair, no-one was taken advantage of.

At the same time we didn't have a strict time for drop off, it was between 8am and 8.15am but that was set by us according to when we needed to leave for work. If our trains home kept being delayed and we couldn't make say, 6.30pm pick up then we've change it to 6.45pm.

One of the major reasons for using a childminder is that there was flexibility with drop off and pick up times and nursery was far too rigid.

You would be surprised at how many people think you need to be here at 10 past I leave at 20 past leaves them pulling across the drive blocking me in and think I have time to load their children feed breakfast and have a chat at 8.20.

How can nursery be flexible? Most childminders are a lot more flexible than a nursery....have you heard of nursery keeping a child because mums in labour, doing emergency weekend care?
Most settings accommodate late drop offs and early collection. Many of us have conminders or can arrange emergency placements.

This would drive me mad. I pay my childminder from 8-6 but really I can drop off or pick up anytime between 7:45 and 6:15 without paying extra as long as I let her know and she's home. Depending on traffic when I pick up can be any time between 5:30-6pm, I'd hate to have to sit outside her house waiting my alloted time. I chose a childminder over a nursery for the flexibility.. also the pram thing is bonkers

The childminder should have her own buggies and child seats as yours may not be safe to use.

It's their living on the line if yours isn't safe, they use it and it causes injury/death.

Mine had her own singles, doubles and a triple plus car seats.