Mums, is this weird or am I being weird?

[ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees]

Hi, I don't know if neighbour is weird or if I'm just being silly?

I also don't have any children or huge experience with them. I asked a mom friend and think she is still laughing at me!!!

I don't know my neighbours well other than to wave and say hello in passing. I don't even know their names or they mine. I suspect they don't have family nearby.

This evening I get knock on the door. Male neighbour and his little girl. It's clear little girl (5/6) is a little upset. Mum is pregnant and due in 2 weeks and has been taken to hospital for observation. Don't have full story but iron & blood pressure issues.

The man has asked if I can do his daughter's hair every morning for school as he can't plait it. Little girl has gorgeous long hair she always wears in a plait. He can't plait it.

In awkwardness, I tried to show him how. I think he has bigger things on his mind as he didn't really want to learn, just wants me to do it. Anyway I have agreed to plait it every morning while mum is in hospital once his daughter is here at a certain time. What else could I say?

Is this normal and ok? Will the mum be ok with it? Should kids that age not be able to do it themselves? Could he not just put it in a ponytail?

Please tell me it's normal and I'm just overthinking it. I'm not usually awkward but this has thrown me for some reason. I don't know these people.

As others have said it is definitely an out of the ordinary request! However - it is a kind thing you could do to help the little girl through what is probably a very scary time. Kids are often very attached to their usual way of doing things - so I can quite imagine her wanting her normal plait and getting upset that dad couldn't do it. Some are saying he could learn - yes, but in my daughter's case, she would never let me do her hair repeatedly until I got it right - so that might have made it difficult for him to try and practise. So yes - I think it is a slightly annoying thing for you and probably out of both your and their comfort zones, but I would do it for the little girl and feel good that I had made a tough time a little smoother for her ❤️

It is strange that he asked and you are not close. He is maybe just worried about his little one looking presentable for school. My hubby made a point of learning basic ponytails as our oldest 3 are girls! For times like this.
My 11 year old still needs help styling her hair so at 5/6 they very much still need adult help.

Do you live in the south?
In the north you’d know all your neighbours by full name, probably know their birthday. You plait the girls hair but also look after her so dad could visit mum and you’d have taken them some home cooking round too 😂

I think its lovely and not at all weird, although going by the remarks on here, no wonder neighbours are very cold to each other.

It's a bit strange but honestly some men just have no idea!
My daughter is mixed race with afro hair and if I ever left her with her dad for a few days, she cone back with knots so bad, I'd spend hours getting them out or having to cut them .
Maybe this poor dad just wants his daughter to look nice and is trying his best for mum while she's in hospital.
It could be that mum is very previous about how her children look.

It also could be that he wants someone to get to know his daughter in case of emergencies. It's very kind of you.

I grew up in a village, I had my hair done by others on numerous occasions especially if my dad was in charge, couldn't work the VCR let alone do hair on his 3 daughters

The girl is probably too young for platting though she might be able to get her hair into very uneven bunches

My son is 8 and cannot do his own hair (he is sn) I have to put in 10+ braids on a Sunday for the week

Hopefully mum will be feeling better soon, it's nice the day thinks enough of you to bring the girl to you for help, I wish everyone had neighbours like you when life goes a bit wonky

Keep up and stop making such weird assumptions, why would your mind think like that!

He's both trying to get her to babysit and into her bed?

What a wonderful neighbourly and kind thing to have done. Glad the baby arrived safely.

This is very kind of you to help out with the little girls hair this dose build up a neighbourly bond, and community

Hi @ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees

I’m imagining a conversation like this….
Mum - Dave, you’ll need to plait Emily’s hair every day when I’m in hospital/recovering at home.

Dave - I can’t do plaits! She’ll have to have it down for a few days.

Emily - It’s ok, that nice lady who lives next door looks nice. I bet she can plait my hair.

Mum - But we don’t know that lady Emily - we can’t ask her to do your hair!
Emily - yes we can, she won’t mind I bet. Dad can ask her.

Dad - right fine, I’ll ask her but I bet she’ll say no……

😊

I know lots of people taken into hospital while pregnant for ages, with my first I was in for 6 weeks while pregnant. This is a bizarre thing to think! There are loads of conditions that mean you’re in hospital for awhile when pregnant!

Well they won’t be strangers anymore …

What a mug! What a shit dad!tell him to YouTube it and he’ll have cracked it by Monday

😂 my daughters 13 and I've still not managed so good luck to him

@Verbena17 🤣 Why would a young child think up the idea that a neighbour she doesn’t know could do her hair? That more strange that this dad thinking up the idea. 😬🤣

No i don't think it's weird, he may have thought because you said hello in passing that it would be okay to ask. My 7 year old girl cannot plait her hair and I would t expect her to. Her father who has long hair for 17 years wouldn't even be able to plait her hair.

I would also be thankful that my partner reached out for help, he may no be interested in learning but I don't think that makes him a bad person?

if one of my neighbours be it someone I don't know or do know well, I'd be happy to help out if they need if

I am glad l don't live near some nasty people round here who can't give a helping hand to someone in need just because he is a man, obviously full of men haters. Well done op, you will no doubt have made a friend for life.

I'd be willing to show him but I wouldn't be doing it for him, especially if he refused my offer to show him.

I don't hate men but I refuse to enable them just because I'm a woman and society expects me to say ''aww bless'' and do it. Absolutely not.

I think that’s fair. The OP did show him, but says he showed no interest in learning, which would have irritated me. ‘I am ignoring your generous attempt to show me how to do a simple hair style for my child, and instead I am going straight to ‘Will you commit to doing this for me every morning my wife is hospitalised, because you have magic woman knowledge and tons of free time on working days, clearly?’

More women refusing to enable weaponised incompetence would improve the world.

That first morning, when presumably his wife had only just been admitted and he was worried about her, the baby AND his little girl and getting her to school, yes, he didn't have the time or the headspace to be shown what to do. But if you read OP's posts, on the subsequent days he DID watch and learn what to do.

For goodness' sake, read OP 's posts properly and stop berating this guy for having his head all over the place with worry and trying to manage everything.

" I don't know these people."

You do now... 😊👍

maybe because she has long hair that she wears up and, as the OP said, has commented on the girl's hair before.

@SouthLondonMum22 👏