To think this is probably the worst mistake ever

[Justbreakingnow]

I know, it’s not forever, but does anyone enjoy this? Memories become hazy over the years and it’s easy to remember the baby days as this lovely simple time. Mine just cries and cries relentlessly. Won’t feed and won’t really interact with anything.

So I’ve just lost it. I’ve screamed and screamed and put the baby somewhere I can’t hear and I don’t care. It feels a bit like -
well, I’ve tried all day to comfort and got nowhere so is there actually any point? I’m miserable and I can’t see forwards.

My sympathies OP, it's not easy. On Christmas day many years ago, when my father was around 6 years old. He looked at his baby brother, a screamer - who seemed to be aiming for record breaking decibels at the time, and suggested to the entire family that they put him out in the coal shed.

I remember it well. My daughter is 31 now but I remember getting so tired of it all I had to leave the house once and go for a long walk or I would have done something I regretted. These days are so tough. But they do pass, trust me.

Just remembered - all mine had dummies. DC2 was going so mental one day DC1 (aged four) said to me ‘put the plug in!’

Agree white noise and dummy made a huge difference for us.

It’s hard work I was a lone parent and had no help. If you’ve done your best today so spent some time with baby, dressing, feeding, taken them for a walk leave them alone in a cot for a couple of hours whilst you are elsewhere is fine. They will eventually learn to have a nap in this time each day 🤞🏾

Buying a jumperoo was the single best thing I did for my 6 month old dd. She loved it. That and a starlight swing.

The music from both is permanently embedded in my brain, but it was way better than screaming.

Oh gosh you have my sympathy 💐 I hope it helps to see that so many others have found it just as difficult! I recall looking at parents with young teenagers and envying them soooo much because mine was just a baby, and a screaming one at that! I just couldnt imagine how I was going to get through it. It gets much easier though, it really does, yes you face other challenges as they grow, but once they're able to communucate it gets so much easier!
You've had some really good tips, I hope you'll be able to use some of them 🤗

There is a charity called HomeStart which offers support to parents in your situation - perhaps see if there is anything in your area https://www.home-start.org.uk/.

Might it be her gut? Could you try some baby probiotics?

Some babies are full of discomfort for whatever reason but some do quieten down once their tummies sort themselves out.

Is she starting solids? Could it be that?

These are made with bifidobacteria which are so very very important in the first year of life and prevent babies from developing allergies later in life. Many babies don't have this bacteria in their intestines anymore and there is new research showing that without these, it could be reason we all have so much asthma, ezcema and hayfever, among other things, not to mention other more serious autoimmune conditions.

The immune system is primed in the first three years of life for they way it responds for the rest of your life.

Try giving them for 28 days and see if there is a difference. It can take that long for the microbiome to shift and heal.

There are other types to try as well. The more variety/diversity of good bacteria you can give your baby, the better.

https://www.optibacprobiotics.com/uk/product/for-your-baby-30-servings baby drops

I feel for you, most of us have done exactly the same thing. You done the right thing by putting her down and walking away. Cal you HV and ask her to check the baby out. Hopefully little one will settle soon. It is not easy having nobody to turn to and i have no magic solution but we are here for you. If you are in S.W Scotland feel free to message me.

And both mine were screamers and did break me. They both ended up on omeprazole at 6 months which helped so much.

I also wonder if you should be ruling out medical or other issues? It is unusual for a 6 month old to cry a lot with no obvious cause, particularly if not responding to comfort.

My daughter had severe reflux so badly she would stop breathing

i remember one day she screamed for 20 solid hours……

my mum came over and I just gave her to her and went out and just sat on a bench for 30 mins

i just needed to get out

its really normal to feel overwhelmed. It’s ok to say you’re struggling. It’s ok to say you’re tired and it’s ok to say you need suppoet

im in the south of England if that’s of any help! Xx

I’m also more than happy to pass you my number for some moral support. ♥️

Oh OP you have my sympathies. We had a really tough spell with our DS around the 6 month mark, nothing would calm him. It did pass after a few weeks. Just take one day at a time, get out as much as possible, rest as much as possible. Be kind to yourself. A bit of gentle sleep training helped us massively.

My eldest was the same OP, it’s a wonder I had a second (thankfully they were a breeze compared). The baby days are a blur to me now and I honestly think I blocked it out in some kind of trauma response. I wish I’d known about home start back then. I know a few people who volunteer and they literally go round and watch the baby/tidy up/wash bottles for a couple of hours once a week. I don’t know how it works in other areas but check it out and if you can get support through them, take it! It’s a bloody hard slog, and a waiting game until they get a bit older and you can semi reason with them. You are right to put the baby somewhere safe and take a breather when it gets too much. I hope things improve soon xxx

Sorry, I had only read your posts, where you said there was no one, and then reiterated that fact. I didn't realise you meant no one at this moment rather than in the world!

I hope your day improves. The mantra 'nothing stays the same for long' can be helpful to look beyond the moment.

Join a church, the church community is full of people who care and are happy to help.

The baby days are a blur to me now and I honestly think I blocked it out in some kind of trauma response.

This really resonates! I look at pictures of me with my daughter as a baby, and its like looking at different people 😆

I am at the stage where I'm clucking at newborns through my rose-tinted specs, but I then remind myself of when I thought "thank fuck" in response to someone telling me to "treasure the moment because it flies by".
I was probably roaming the village in a haze looking like crap.

Will she fall asleep in the pram? There’s a gadget you can get called a Rockit which you can strap to a pram and it sort of jiggles the pram for you so baby doesn’t realise you’ve stopped moving and wake up. See if you can pick up a cheap one secondhand on Facebook, could be worth a shot.

Is it your first baby? Mine is a similar age and she is super cranky. But as it's my third I'm just trying to relax and tell myself it's a stage. It's helping a bit.

My friend had this. She got one of those electric train things and attached a moses basket thing to it. And just let's it go round and round it, sometimes in the garden, sometimes in front of open windows. It's funny but it's the only thing that works 🤣 baby loves it

You poor thing, OP. I remember days like this well.

My younger one could be soothed with her electric swing. I bought it secondhand. And I agree with putting them in the pram and walking. It does seem to calm the, and at least you’re doing something to benefit yourself too.