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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Awful gift off DP and he’s being precious about it!

348 replies

Gertrood · 28/01/2024 19:37

My birthday yesterday. DP handed me a gift which turned out to be a hideous charm bracelet - clearly meant for children. Made from pure metal. I don’t wear jewellery at the best of times but would have worn something decent on special occasions - this however I would never wear. I’m normally a very grateful person but I half thought this was a joke until I saw how proud of himself he was so I said “it’s a lovely thought but I don’t really wear jewellery”. He said “well you’ll have to wear this as it cost me a lot of money, anyway you’ve not opened the other one yet” - so I opened the other one and it was a small bag of metal charms. Awfully childish and generic ones like a stiletto, a little metal car!? A unicorn!!!

So I said “as I said, it’s a nice thought but I won’t wear this, it’s for children” he said “it’s not for children! You dont have to wear all the charms but I do insist you wear this one that I chose especially” - it was a charm saying “true love” 🤦‍♀️ I’m getting annoyed at this point and say “you chose that one especially? So the others were just bought in bulk?” So he said “no, they were all different sets and I chose this one for you”.

I explained that charms on a bracelet are meant to at least resemble something to the owner. This stuff couldn’t be more opposite to what I’m like. I’ve never worn a stiletto in my life - I have no interest in cars - I don’t have a thing for unicorns!!??

Si anyway I said “I’m sorry if you spent a lot of money on it but I won’t wear it, it’s not me at all” I then suggested he give it to his daughter (12). He said he can’t do that as hes bought her the same one already!!

He’s in a huff about it but AIbU to think this was really bloody thoughtless? I’d have rather got nothing at all. It’s tacky as hell. The best bit, I looked at his eBay account where I guessed it was from and it cost him £2.99 - the charms were a job lot for £3 including the one he “chose especially”

OP posts:
Stompythedinosaur · 28/01/2024 19:57

One day this will make a funny story!

Obviously he's useless and not behaving in a particularly caring way.

Crunchymum · 28/01/2024 19:58

He got his 12yo DD the cannabis leaf too?

What have his prior gifts been like?

OneTC · 28/01/2024 19:58

Patchworksack · 28/01/2024 19:54

He was done - this one is is only £2.94

Also, you are done with him, surely?

Loving that they're passing that off as 925 silver as well 😅

FloofyKat · 28/01/2024 19:58

Call him out on his lie! It’s not an expensive piece of jewellery!

fairo · 28/01/2024 19:58

Gertrood · 28/01/2024 19:56

That looks like the same one! Some of the same charms too

Omg.. its not even 2.94 its 2.94 or best offer!!!

mummabubs · 28/01/2024 20:00

It's quite rare that I completely agree with somone calling their partner out over a gift but this was an absolute fail on his part. And no thought for you at all. The only scrap of compassion I can muster is how is money for him, would £6 be all he could afford? (Even then I'd legit prefer to get 6 chocolate bars than the bracelet and charms!) Gift other one to his daughter and then she can give it to her best friend as a matching bracelet? 😅

Sorry though OP, that's a shit bday present. Did he get you anything else?

goingdownfighting · 28/01/2024 20:00

It's not only the bracelet I'd be pissed off with, it would be the lies. Definitely get him a bottle of lynx for his birthday.

Anniegetyourgun · 28/01/2024 20:00

Maybe to him three quid for a present IS expensive. Which is probably even worse than pretending it was.

If he has a 12 year old daughter he's surely old enough to know better.

sumptuous · 28/01/2024 20:01

The Pandora ones look just as cheap. It’s the thought that counts.

MassiveOvaryaction · 28/01/2024 20:02

I swear I've read this thread before, down to giving it to his daughter. How long have you been with him?! I've been on Mumsnet for donkeys so it's possible he's moved on and is trying the same on someone else. I'd rather believe that than there's more than one of them!!

wp65 · 28/01/2024 20:02

sumptuous · 28/01/2024 20:01

The Pandora ones look just as cheap. It’s the thought that counts.

There was clearly zero fucking thought involved

DaphneMoo · 28/01/2024 20:04

He sounds awful, buying you cheap tat and getting upset with you when you say you don't like it. A good partner should want you to be happy with your present and you should be comfortable saying something is not for you. My dp got me jewellery for Christmas ( a damn sight more than £2.94) and he was happy to go with me to exchange for something I wanted. If I were you, I would be looking at the relationship.

ChangeAgain2 · 28/01/2024 20:04

I would gave preference a lay in and breakfast in bed.

You partner is as tight as a ducks arse and is tasteless to boot.

Rachie1973 · 28/01/2024 20:05

I thought it was going to be a Pandora or something! Lol. They’re subjective, you either love or hate them. I have one, all the charms bought by my family and all mean something to me. I’d be a bit ‘meh’ at a random charm I think.

But that bracelet he got….. oh dear lol

I’d have to call him out on the lying. That would piss me off more than poor taste.

barkymcbark · 28/01/2024 20:05

I'd ask him for the receipt so you can take it back and get something you like, especially as it was such an expensive present. Then when he won't give it to you I'd tell him you know she's spent a fiver and it was from eBay

sumptuous · 28/01/2024 20:05

wp65 · 28/01/2024 20:02

There was clearly zero fucking thought involved

Imagine if he had paid £££ for a cheap and nasty Pandora one though that would be worse and a total waste of much more money.

TheChosenTwo · 28/01/2024 20:06

Bloody hell! I usually think people moaning about presents are just being ungrateful but this truly is shit and I can’t think of a single person who would be grateful to receive this piece of absolute junk!
is he always a thoughtless cheapskate?

thecatsarecrazy · 28/01/2024 20:07

I would probably throw it in the bin. That's just insulting

Rattai · 28/01/2024 20:07

Show him his ebay account....?

LutonBeds · 28/01/2024 20:08

sumptuous · 28/01/2024 20:05

Imagine if he had paid £££ for a cheap and nasty Pandora one though that would be worse and a total waste of much more money.

Edited

At least OP could sell that for an ok price though!

Wishimaywishimight · 28/01/2024 20:09

Wear it for a couple of days then show him your wrist when it turns green!

JustWhatWeDontNeed · 28/01/2024 20:11

I think he doesn't like you very much.

I can only imagine if DH dared to buy, let alone hand me, a £2.99 ebay bracelet.

I wouldn't want it for a child either, in case they had a reaction.

Patchworksack · 28/01/2024 20:12

barkymcbark · 28/01/2024 20:05

I'd ask him for the receipt so you can take it back and get something you like, especially as it was such an expensive present. Then when he won't give it to you I'd tell him you know she's spent a fiver and it was from eBay

This is a great idea - you can say you love the sentiment behind ‘love you’ but the stiletto is not quite your thing - you’d love to exchange it ( for a give him the boot)

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 28/01/2024 20:13

You and his daughter share the same birthday date ?

or yours is for your birthday, and hers is a present anyway ?