.... to dislike fashion and 'femininity'?

[AnnaSewell]

This is prompted by having to buy a new sweater.

I dislike shopping for clothes, because I like plain comfortable clothing in dark/subdued/neutral colours. These things are not easy to find and the search for them is troublesome.

I like natural fibres and garments that have pockets. I dislike most floral designs and patterns, as well as fussy ornamentation. I don't like low necks or high hemlines.

I do not wish to be 'pretty'. I don't want to wear shoes that hurt my feet, in which it would be hard to walk or run.

I dislike wearing make-up and the thought of having to blow-dry/style my hair/have it cut regularly depresses me beyond measure. I change clothes, and bathe regularly. My morning routine consists of combing my hair and cleaning my teeth.

I don't remove body hair about from using tweezers if a single hair has appeared on my neck or chin.

I have a range of acceptable clothes for work and also some items that will do well enough for more formal occasions - weddings, funerals, celebrations.

There is a sort of pleasure in finding the right garments, but then I am happy to wear these same things again and again. (It is horrible when these items wear out, because it is hard to find exact replacements.)

Hours of time and a great deal of money is saved, this way. So I am pretty comfortable with these choices.

Does anyone out there make similar choices?

I am no more stating my own experience as fact than you are, and your entitlement to project your experience as more valid than my own is pretty staggering. Out of all the women I’ve met in my life, the vast majority wear makeup and invest in fashion (mentally, emotionally or financially) to a degree that is considerably greater than I do. Those who don’t engage with either are certainly unusual in my experience. I’m glad your experience differs, though I am surprised given how sensitive you seem to be about the topic.

I’m not sure that the responses on this thread - on the internet where you only see what people choose to share - is a reasonable source of evidence to counter the extent of real life experiences I’ve had to the contrary.

In my experience you are absolutely not correct on both counts. You can disagree with my experience to your heart’s content, though. Unlike you, I don’t try to dismiss other people’s experiences.

👍

Yup I'm with you on this. Saves a fortune. My current big bear is all the tops seem so short. I do t want to flash my stomach every time I reach up. I've had 3 kids ffs

I prioritise quality and function over form. I also happen to appreciate the form of purely functional items. I'll spend time and money getting the right stuff

That's just a different way to be interested in clothes surely?

Aesthetics, functionality and acceptable quality are all personal judgements and equally valid. I'm very interested in clothes but not at all in fashion or following it

Makes sense @OneTC
I was just trying to get into OP's mindset .

I'm very interested in clothes but not at all in fashion or following it

Me too.

You and @easylikeasundaymorn have hit the nail on the head.
I think OP is a bit confused by 'fashion'.
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/fashion
Fashion = latest styles, trends.

In reality, I doubt that many people genuinely 'follow fashion' because that would mean constantly buying new clothes. Who has the money for that? Or the wardrobe space?

I think you mean trends or aesthetics. Fashion is term that can just mean the creation of clothes. And many people aren’t interested in current trends. Many people are. Either is not unusual.

Op has very exacting standards. She has preferences in the clothes she wears. She is interested in the creation Of clothes. She is interested in wearing what she is comfortable in. She isn’t buying anything as long as it covers her.

I think that’s one of the disconnects on the thread. Op spends far more time thinking about and looking for clothes than a lot of people spend. However, she isn’t looking for them to fit a current trend. She is looking at them To suit her preferences. So she is interested in fashion.

If the OP is buying her clothes new rather than vintage she is perforce buying fashionable clothes. More or less. No clothing manufacturer is going to produce clothes they do not think will be popular and sell in sufficient quantities to make them a profit. Shops select items to sell based on what is currently being made.

It’s honestly laughable that any intelligent person can imagine they are buying clothes in a vacuum, unaffected by current trends. Even vintage shopping is an acknowledgement that that sort of buying is socially acceptable or desirable.

OP, totally your choice, but not mine. And why feel the need to announce it rather than just getting on with what you want to do?

Good for you. It doesn’t make you better than anyone else.

It's really sad that OP defines feminine as "wearing makeup." Feminine and masculine go much deeper, and have more to do with personality than something as superficial as makeup!

It’s a very pervasive assumption though isn’t it? The idea that adornment of any kind undermines your feminist credentials.

Its particularly odd these days when a lot of grooming and aesthetic considerations for women are motivated more by work considerations than keeping a man happy.

I think there’s definitely a decent scoop of reverse snobbery about it all. Where I grew up looking quite “masculine” and puritan with minimal makeup was very much seen as a stealth marker of your intellectual bragging rights. I think there’s quite a lot of that on this thread.

Plenty shops sell plain clothes in dark colours as far as I can see. I like clothes actually but I hate flowery prints. Not too sure where you’d think that leaves me though?

@Mayjune11 the op might not look scruffy or under dressed- my DW is very butch, she would say the same about clothes and grooming (although she does have her hair trimmed every 3 weeks). But hair removal/make up/skin care etc are totally outside her interests.

She only wears men’s clothes but still looks professionally dressed for work, smart for weddings etc.

It isn’t my way, but ‘not feminine’ doesn’t necessarily equate to un stylish or scruffy.

The OP has not returned.

After the torrent of 'not like other "girls"' sneers, can you blame her?

No I don’t blame her at all. It‘s a pity as it could have been a more interesting discussion without some posters’ projecting their insecurities.

What was the point of her post though? It came across like “I’m better than you”.

Agree. This is very well explained by Meryl Streep character in The Devil Wears Prada

Agree. This is very well explained by Meryl Streep character in The Devil Wears Prada

Love that speech

Funnily enough OP's erm 'snickering' has been brought about by a sweater.
https://artdepartmental.com/blog/devil-wears-prada-cerulean-monologue/

https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/yu1ydy/thecerulean_monologue_from_the_devil_wears_prada/