Are my kids naughty or normal

[Jingledog]

I have a 2 year and 3.5 year old DS. Went shopping today and the 2 year was in pram wailing until he was given snacks and screeching at top of lungs.

3 year old wanted to do everything tap the card put food in trolley scan items etc when I did some too as he had a meltdown threw himself on the floor screaming and saying mummy I wanted to do it. Same in the next shop then running off after pigeons and not coming back.

Went for lunch ystrday with friend and who has kids same age they sat there nicely next to their parents at the table playing with some little toys and looking at books while mine ran loops around the restaurant cackling at the top of their lungs and wouldn't settle until I resorted to giving them screen time.

I have tried not giving in to them but the tantrums are extreme and long so sometimes give them what they want as my nerves can't take anymore.

Is it the way I've patented or is this normal behaviour?

When my friend's (lovely but lively) boys were this age, her DH used to take them to the park to burn off some energy before breakfast. She said it was like having puppies.

Don't worry.

All the mums will rue the day they were smug in ten years.

All My friends with girls and I mean ALL including myself are having issues with our teen girls now.

So it comes around.
💐

So take the problem elsewhere and lumber other people with it - yes? What gave you the idea that everyone loves to be surrounded by feral children and an apathetic parent looking on (or gazing at their phone)? If your child has an accident in the street or a cafe or restaurant, caused by running around while hot food and plates are in use, will you blame someone else for it? Of course you will, it won't be due to crap parenting - oh no.

@DriftingDora your reply is just so unnecessary.

That poster clearly means you need to remove the child from the situation and go somewhere safe. Home or the car.

How do you know that? The poster says 'So go to different places'. This just transfers the problem elsewhere - and I rightly pointed out the dangers of allowing kids to run riot without intervention. This is something any responsible parent would know, without having to have it pointed out to them, but it seems that some people don't.

And who died, and made you head of the Thread Police?

I couldn't agree more.

I've been at the receiving end myself of the perfect parents on here who are so 'strict and consistent' and whose children are silent in public.

What strikes me is that the thing that these parents are most afraid of, is their kid making a noise in public and them getting judged for it.

Who gives a shit honestly ? Just yesterday my 2 year old was having a tantrum in the supermarket.

That's what 2 year olds do !! You literally can't do much but wait it out. Lots of people looked, they always do, as it's loud. I don't really care. I'm doing my best. My child is growing and developing and this is NORMAL ! I need to go food shopping and sometimes it happens.

Get over yourselves and stay home if you don't want to hear a tantrum.

Sound pretty normal to me, only thing i dont like is kids running about in restaurants

I can state anything I like on here, thanks.

I think your assumption just doesn't make any sense.

Well, snap! The same privilege extends to my post - I call it as I see it, so please feel free to jog on.

And how does your assumption make sense - do you have the gift of reading the OP's mind, or is it your usual guesswork?

@DriftingDora I think you think you have the gift of reading minds too.

I know you can state what you want and I have the freedom to say your post was unnecessary.

It just is what it is isn't it. We can both write what we want, within the guidelines.

The same privilege extends to my post - I call it as I see it, so please feel free to jog on.

Lol. Why bother putting a statement out on the internet for all to see if your only desired outcome is for people to 'jog on' past it?

Out of interest, are your friend's children girls?
ffs sexist nonsense, I have 3DD, 1DS and he was the best behaved of them all when little.

Some little boys are naturally well behaved, one of my ds's is. But a high-spirited boy will knock spots off a high-spirited girl any day, sorry. If you haven't had one, then I just don't think you can understand. Boys and girls are, overall, different and the top end of boisterousness for boys is just another level compared the vast majority of girls.

OP, they will grow out of it to some extent, but some little boys are just not meant for sitting. Mine are an absolute delight if they're outside, running around. This is when they get to shine and you get to see the amazing traits they have that some other children don't (bravery, resilience, humour in the case of my boisterous boy).

So interesting and original - did it hurt? Bye.

Can you read? I was replying to a particular poster's comment.

Does this help you?

My youngest two were angels - pretty much all down to their personalities. They're still like that now. My oldest couldn't be taken into a cafe or restaurant until he was about 4 due to not being able to sit and be still/quiet, he's just always been an outdoors child and HATED being made to be still, so we simply didn't take him. No amount of tryng to teach him worked, so we just waited until he was mature enough to understand social rules etc. He's a great 10 year old now and a delight. Back then though, no way was that toddler going to sit still.

I think a lot really is down to temperament and personality. Some kids are just spirited toddlers / preschoolers and you just need to wait for them to mature. Whilst also setting boundaries, keeping them safe, avoiding situations which spiral, preempting tantrums when you can, distracting them when you can and making sure you look after yourself in the meantime too. A lot of patience is required.

@KittensSchmittens Mine too. I'm realising this. Your boys sound great! 😃

@playpuppy agree. I can already see some maturity developing every time he has a long sleep etc just edging towards it not quite fully there yet but almost

@playpuppy I think you're right! They're still so young

And most intelligent readers completely understood what you meant when you suggested taking the kids to another space. Some people seem to need to have everything spelled out for them.

Well of course you would agree with the replies that mean you don’t have to change anything 😂

They aren’t going to grow out of it. You have to actually parent them.

Sometimes I wonder why people have children when they don’t want to put in the effort to parent them 🤔

@BananasInThreePieceSuits you're just making assumptions though. I'm sure the OP parents her children. Just because she said she sometimes gives into a tantrum. Or she said that her kids ran around a restaurant once. My kids have done that/ tried to do that. Sometimes I was able to control them/ distract them, other times we had to leave. I've also given into tantrums occasionally.

I've seen first hand how children grow out of it. Young children of 2 and 3 can be completely unreasonable sometimes. It takes time for them to develop emotional maturity.

You can be as firm as you like, sometimes things escalate because you're too firm. You're better off ignoring them / leaving a place and finding different activities to do that don't trigger their wrath. Mid tantrum, you literally can't do anything to make it stop.

I'm 100 percent sure OP has taken some advice on board, but to completely accuse someone of ' not parenting ' because they described a couple of instances is bonkers.

My kids are getting so much better now they're older. ( not the youngest, he's only 2 ). They make so much progress, just with time. I haven't handled every situation perfectly, but they're ok and have grown out of it.

You're determined to tear the OP down when she was in a vulnerable moment.

This is why I avoided taking my children out to eat (or anywhere in fact) until they were over 5 - they were a nightmare. They're a lot older now but they still get restless. Every child is different so you really can't, and probably shouldn't, compare. I have two boys, a colleague has two girls, roughly the same age - his children get on, rarely argue etc. Mine are the best of friends but life resembles a WWE match 90% of the time. They're kids, just correct the behaviour and don't sweat it - it doesn't last :)

Some people seem to need to have everything spelled out for them.

You're quite right. I've noticed this many times with your posts, but didn't like to tell you.