Disappointed with birthday trip

[Holidaybluees]

NC as I’m ashamed of how I’m feeling. DP booked us a cruise for my milestone birthday this summer. It’s going to two city locations in Europe. He’s put a lot of thought into it and couldn’t wait to tell me about it. I’m incredibly grateful he’s booked something but I’m so sad at the same time. For his milestone birthday last year I took him to Europe (beach holiday) and we went to a water park as he loves them. 5 star all inclusive adults only hotel. The cruise he’s booked is adult only but we only get less than a full day in each location.

I love a beach holiday and water sports like jet skiing so whilst I’m so grateful I’m so confused about what he’s booked. My birthday is in the summer so I said I didn’t mind going away later in the year when flights are cheaper. I assumed this made it clear I wanted a beach holiday (like for like) but clearly I wasn’t clear enough as there’s no flights involved for my trip.

I don’t know what to do and I’ve felt a bit teary today as it feels like he doesn’t know me at all. One of the places we’re going to is on my list of holidays but it’s not where I’d go for a big birthday. I have no interest in the other city. I don’t know if I can say anything to him without seeming like a bitch but I’m so deflated. Should I say something or suck it up?

@bombardelli a beach holiday is not a need!!

😂😂

Have you forgotten how high temperatures got in the UK last summer?

He knew she wanted a beach holiday and he booked a cruise from Portsmouth that wouldn’t even be warm

Here’s a picture from when I was cruising the English Channel.

No, she specifically told him she wanted sand on her holiday!

And OP says he was happy with his holiday, I’m not assuming anything.

Agreed. So many Stepford Wives who need every woman to be like them so their misery has company.

Yes, because a holiday to Bruges is really a need! 🙄

And you’ve missed my point completely, what a surprise. Not.

Sunny does not equal warm enough for sunbathing on a beach.

@bombardelli they don't have beaches on cruise ships! Lots of people sun bathing round the pool though!

I’ll go if you don’t want to! 🙋🏼‍♀️

Aww shucks really?! Thanks for stating the blimmin obvious.

My point is OP wanted to sunbathe on the beach, but even sunny weather doesn’t mean it’s warm enough to sub bathe on a cruise ship in the English channel in the temperatures OP describes.

@bombardelli so why did she tell her DH she wanted to visit Amsterdam? 🤔

Lack of communication, she needs to acknowledge!

Or, it was a nice thought coming from the right place, it's in a continuum with what she wants to do at some point and it's something that she's willing to do if they can't get their money back so clearly not that hideous an option. Therefore the living thing to do is accept, trust him, open your mind and go. It's a cruise to Amsterdam, not white water rafting in shark infested waters in the middle of a mosquito plague

That's really what you're seeing?

She mentioned Amsterdam in the past and only in the context of a long weekend.

For this surprise trip she told him she wanted sand i.e. a beach holiday.

At the end of the day if you want to do something specific then say, don’t say “surprise me” then complain about the suprise.

i have just turned 40, i wasn’t fussed about anything other than wanting to go to see one musical. So I said “I want to go and see wicked” so that was the present. If I had said “I want to go to the theatre” but then just dropped random hints about wanting music I couldn’t have complained if I got tickets for something else.

@bombardelli so for the "surprise trip" she actually wanted to choose...

and the beach at Zebrugge (where cruises for Bruges dock) is actually lovely if I remember rightly!

Well done Op for not being a MN doormat. We are a minority!

@bombardelli

Agreed. So many Stepford Wives who need every woman to be like them so their misery has company.

@Travis1

Jeeez the bitterness oozing from this thread is unreal. Glad you spoke to him @Holidaybluees fingers crossed you can get it changed

OR some posters have given their opinion which OP asked for and you both are taking a swipe at posters that you disagree with nice going

Yes serious doormat issues, no wife should be forced to accept a cruise as a present!

What?

Exactly! Esp when they want a beach holiday! Their partners should know them enough to be thoughtful about their wife’s needs and wishes for her birthday.

I'm glad the chat turned out ok and I'm glad for you both that you've realised surprises aren't your thing. It'll save a lot of bitten tongues and unwanted gifts.

😂

@BiscuitHoney like listening to them saying Amsterdam?

Oh no, not the right way for the OP to visit! Got to be a different way! Cruising in not good enough 😆