Does anyone else just generally dislike other people?

[Inthebleakmidwinter764]

I do. They're either loud or annoying or they ask too many questions or they're rude or demanding or they don't have a concept of personal space. I could go on 🤣

The “mumsnet is full of - insert one type of person-“ comments are so dumb. Look at how many arguments there are! If we were all the same, we’d all be in agreement all the time. You wouldn’t have people on every introvert thread going “Oh! Only on mumsnet are such miserable cretins found!”

The two aren't necessarily linked.
I definitely don't feel lonely, despite having less social interaction than a lot of people. Also, lots of social interaction, if there's little meaning to any of it, can actually make someone feel more lonely. Apparently social happy people can be lonely, and apparently reserved folk can be perfectly happy!
To quote Roddy Frame in his song 'Stray': 'Loneliness and being alone don't always mean the same'.

Agreed!

En masse, yes - but not individually.

Almost all groups of people (by class, age etc) seem annoying when you generalise them into an amorphous mass. Try to focus on individuals and you'll feel more positive!

Eg - I'm afraid when I see any group all doing the same thing (football fans, pram-pushing mums, loud groups out for the evening, teenagers) it irritates me. But as individuals or in small groups I'm perfectly well-disposed to them.

I love other people and I’m a huge extrovert in that I get energy from others. I’d hate to be someone that dislikes humans in general

I find it weird when people say they "dislike" people. Aren't you a person as well?

It gives off this air of superiority when in reality you're probably just the same.

’full of thier own self- importance’

You see I find the ‘I hate everyone’ crew far more self-important. As if they are somehow superior than ‘other people’.

I think the fact we live on an over populated island doesn't help.
We all literally live on top of one another.
There's no privacy, at home, workplace, vacation etc.

How patronising ☺️

I like people. Life without other people in it would be horribly flat. Lockdown was a nightmare.

I didn’t mean you specifically but if someone is resentful of “interaction” then yes that resentment is stewing in your own bile.

it may come as a surprise but extraverts are perfectly capable of recognizing introversion in others, and minimizing contact because … well that’s what’s wanted.

It isn't stewing in your own bile if you are simply expressing how annoying it is to be drained by people - unfortunately daily life, work, travel etc can be exhausting for a non-people person, and it is helpful to get it out, so to speak.

As for extroverts understanding introverts, of course some do, but some of the comments suggest that many on here do not (through choice or something else).

Saying Mumsnet has a lot of a type isn't the same as Mumsnet has only one type. Hence the arguments.

Based on the repetition of 'AIBU to not have answered the door...' posts there are, there are clearly a lot of people who are like that 💁🏽‍♀️

To spell it out, I think the blanket sentiment of disliking all other people and never wanting to socialise is deeply maladjusted, and as much as a lot of the annoyances resonate with me, even at my worst I've never leaned all the way into it like a lot of posters on this thread.

Tbh I don't answer the door because I'm lazy, not because I'm antisocial. I don't answer the phone because it's 2024 and almost no one I know communicates like that any more.

Disliking all people is not introversion. This isn't about extroverts misunderstanding introverts, IMHO.

Other people are often stupid. I find the public infuriating mostly.

I don't think anyone said it was. Discussions have developed in response to specific comments though.

I’m referring to people who say they’re lonely because they don’t have friends. And talking about that in the context of not liking people. And mentioning the possible link between not liking/interacting with people to not having friends.

You don’t seem to fit that description. I like my own company a lot as well, but I answer the phone and reply to messages 🙂

I don’t have loads of friends either, just a few, but they’re enough.

Ah right, so you are basically judging others by how you would like to be - that's fair enough, but it doesn't mean your way is the only way. I am happy you are happy with where you are at, and can reflect because we all need to do that at times.

Yes. I’m introverted, in that I need to recharge alone, but I’m relatively sociable, open to new friendships, like spending time with my friends etc — it’s just that I then need time alone to compensate. We had a very social Christmas, hosted family for three days, few parties, saw a lot of old friends home from overseas, and I enjoyed it all. But then I went away solo for three days to somewhere with no phone signal and really needed that for balance. Misanthropy is not introversion.

There are clearly a whole host of folk on MN - some of the lonely ones will like people in general, some will be more selective, some will have lifestyles that make it harder to make folk (eg carer for disabled child or partner), some will maybe be too demanding (or other negative things). I am glad I like my own company because it must be hard for folk who crave others company and struggle, for whatever reason, to find it.

I wouldn’t say that exactly, but I do find quite a lot of people irritating or annoying. Quite a few MNers fall into this category. I so often want to tell people to FFS get a grip, stop being such a doormat, stop being so ludicrously fussy, etc.
Not to mention FFS! learn the difference between lose and loose!

But I keep it zipped.

I don't dislike people; I like them and find people endlessly fascinating. I would love it if people learned the difference between loose and lose, though.

I find the conversations around 'Self importance' to be fascinating. It often comes up.

Those with Asocial leanings accuse those without of being 'self important'.
Those more sociable then accuse those less sociable of being 'self important'.

Now to me, with how my brain works, I don't see how those with asocial leanings could be 'self important'

I think of what 'self important' means and some examples of it.

Let's say common ones like:
Parking outside of school, blocking other pavement users or road users, rushing their kid in because they're running late.
Standing in Tesco with a group and chatting away like they're in a pub, blocking the aisle, forcing everyone to go around or move their trollies, moaning and tutting when asked to move.
Groups walking down the pavements, forcing everyone else to walk around them.
Being always late for meetups or other engagements, expecting everyone else to wait.
Swearing in a playground / softplay and insulting a parent for asking them not too.

In these simple and clichéd examples, those people are putting themselves first and some are complaining when another person points out that's it's inconveniencing them or rude.
To me, is self importance is having no comprehension of, or regard for, the impact of their actions on other people. In fact, people that do those things will often accuse the people they're inconveniencing of being 'self important'.

Meanwhile, those of us with asocial leanings, will do best to spend as little time as possible in society and will try to go unnoticed.
It ain't us blocking pavements with cars.. we're the ones parking three streets away and walking in.
It ain't us having a social engagement near the frozen chickens.
It ain't us marching down the towpaths of the local canals and forcing everyone else to move.
It ain't us swearing like a pissed up trawlerman on a layover with a pocket full of wages and a skinful of ale.

Next time you're out in the world, ask yourselves honestly, how often you consider your impact on other people.
when you're in a shop?
parking a car?
Just walking about?

If you rarely or never consider your impact... Chances are...
You're the fuckers that piss us asocial types off..

Ttfn have a great Tuesday.