To have xl bully stay

[Worndownbyit]

My daughter has 2 dogs, one of which is an xl bully she has recently taken on. Personally I don't mind the xl, but I've grown up with animals, my husband hates the dog and has said that he doesn't want the dog coming when she comes to visit with our grandchildren.
I know this is going to cause a row and my daughter is likely to say she won't come down...(she lives at the opposite end of the country)
AIBU to tell her she can't bring the xl when she comes to visit or should my husband just suck it up?

I think whether you like the dog or not is completely irrelevant. Your dd must know that she's restricting her future quite significantly with this. If my child were friends with her child, I certainly wouldn't be arranging playdates at their house (maybe your dd sees that as a positive).

I wouldn’t have an issue with an XL bully staying that I knew the history of. Most don’t eat children despite the hysteria.

However, I wouldn’t single the XL bully out, just say no dogs.

If your DD has only recently got the dog then she doesn't know how this dog will react. If there are going to be lots of children around which the dog is not familiar with then I'd say that's a risk for any rescue dog.
Your DD sounds like she's trying her best and doing the right thing by the dog but it's still a risk and that would be true for any large rescue dog that is relatively new. Let alone a dog that will likely make everyone wary.
It's his house too, you shouldn't force him to accept a dog into it

I couldn’t agree more. The over the top reaction to this entire sorry episode is awful.

Why does your view trump your husband’s?

Your husband has the top trump . Sorry.

one of which is an xl bully she has recently taken on.

Does your daughter have a history of making stupid decisions?

Regardless of the dogs breed, if your husband doesn't want it in your home, he is within his right to refuse.

I wouldn't allow any large breed dog of unknown history around my kids.

Poor dog. Nobody would have had a problem with her 6 months ago.

Maybe everyone could compromise? You said the dog is muzzle trained? Would your husband be happy to have the dog stay if she was muzzled around children?

Dogs are not allowed in my house. If anyone has a problem with that, they don't visit.

It’s your DHs home and I think his opinion trumps yours in this situation.

I assume that means she can’t come to visit though?

I have no issues with XL bullies, people act like they’re the only breed that can do harm.

But if your DH doesn’t want a dog in his home then that’s his right to say no.

Poor dog. Nobody would have had a problem with her 6 months ago.

Rubbish, there has been growing concern about these awful things and the damage they can do for several years.

I'm team DH. Wouldn't have one in my home, full stop.

Not sure how you are going to enforce that, given you will be almost entirely reliant on what someone chooses to tell you.

Are the grandchildren your daughters children who already live with the dog anyway?

I can see your husbands point, but if the dog already lives with the children then they are at risk anyway in their own house.

Muzzled and responsible owner yes

This a million times..
I’m thinking of examples in my workplace where managers have written glowing references for problem employees, just to get rid of them. It’s shocking but it happens ALL the time!

I would not have it in my house and I regularly host up to 4 dogs at a time. But it is hard to know what else she will do with it.

The person who doesn’t want the XL Bully in the house trumps the person who does.

YABU.

The fact its not spayed tells you everything you need to know about the type of owner she is so, no. I wouldn't have it to stay.

No your husband should NOT just suck it up
This is his home as much as yours.
You both need to be OK with it.

Any dog can bite a child if not monitored. Hence why my comment was about the dog being muzzled around any children

I'm a veterinary nurse and unfortunately have done hundreds of euthanasia's on dogs that have bitten children over the past few years. Maybe 2 of these were on XL bullies/bull breeds.

My comment was simply trying to give a sensible answer and also empathising for the poor dog, who could be the sweetest girl, that everyone (who hasn't met her) is commenting about like she's a wild beast.

Your DH is right.

Your DD has taken on the dog “recently” so she has no idea of true character and triggers and no idea what behaviour caused the rehoming.

Is she strong enough to restrain all 7/8 stone of it if it gets aggressive? I doubt it.

Your dh is within his rights to refuse to have the dog in the house. It's his home too.

Your DD is a fool to keep this dog because few parents will allow their children to visit a house with an unknown XL in it, leaving her dcs isolated. No kennels will board him, so she and her partner are effectively tied to the dog every day for its life.

They won't be able to holiday abroad. They won't be able to go into hospital or ever be away from the family home, unless they have wholly rented somewhere else.

I think many people haven't realised the significance of the restrictions.