If you or your child had private education, was it worth the money?

[edithfg]

Just that really. We can afford it with relative ease but would mean one less holiday a year and we’d always be in the home we are in now. It’s nice and lots of room but essentially means we could go further up the ladder. Small sacrifices really and I want to do best for dc. Was it worth the money?

I think where private can add the most value is pushing a child who'd get 7s at GCSE in state school to 8s and 9s and opening up a slightly higher rung of university as a result.

DH friends (from prep & very highly rated private) are no more academically able the the people I went to school with in terms of their potential and speed of learning, but they went to better rated universities. They also had access to far better career support and awareness of a much bigger range of highly paid jobs as the parents of their schoolmates worked in law, financial services, consulting etc. This has led most into better paid careers. The people I was at school with are very successful in their chosen fields but by and large aren't well paid, they've ended up in public sector and charitable roles or in fields like education, arts & events where pay is much poorer.

My son went to a state primary school and we did consider a private school when it came to secondary education. He didn’t want to go to a private school but wanted to go to a recently opened high school. He did brilliantly getting 9 O levels and 4 A levels.
He went to Leeds Uni and obtained a 2-1 degree in Law. A girl he met at Uni had been privately educated but didn’t do as well in exams or degree. However when it came to interviews for legal positions, she obtained interviews that my son never got a response to. The private education saw to that. She failed the Solicitors exam and the offer of a prestige job with an international legal company was taken away. My son went with a small local company and now years later has his own law firm.

DH and I both went to private school and were not particularly academic or sporty and we didn’t go to uni. However, we both loved our different schools, made lifelong friends and the opportunities and experiences we had absolutely shaped us into the people we are now. DH runs his own business and has done since leaving school 41 years ago so not having a degree has not held him back. Our two DC both went to private school, DD from year 6 and DS from year 1 (did reception at village school but huge class and he got lost). DD embraced the whole experience, was bright, sporty and fitted the school perfectly and joined in everything. They loved her and she loved school. Her grades were amazing and she got a first in her degree and now has a great job using her degree which she loves. For her the school pushed her and she achieved great things. DS was not academic or sporty and has a different experience at the same school. He didn’t love it as much but did not want to move schools and leave his friends. He did love CCF and his house master who helped and encouraged him to follow the path he wanted rather than what would make the school look good. He achieved 12 GCSEs, not all top grades but passes nevertheless passes. He didn’t stay for 6th form and chose to do a practical course at an argricultural college which he absolutely loves. I have no regrets whatsoever about spending the money and sending them and would do it again. They have turned into confident adults who can talk to anyone and are able to earn a living and contribute to society. Whilst the qualifications are important the social skills the gain are invaluable . If you can afford it do it.

On the whole I would say yes. We kept ours at a local day prep school until 13 before they took common entrance and went away to board. So they had local friends still to catch up with during the hols but the benefit of being away from home for five years in a caring environment before uni, which made them more confident and independent when they did.

My oldest started Year 7 in a private school in September after being in a state primary. I have been really pleased with the well-being program and pastoral care and with his access to music and sport, drama, trips etc. You are kept quite well informed of their progress and behaviour as well.

Our reasons for sending him private were more based on the opportunities that it would provide to him rather than him getting straight A’s at A-level. He’s quite a sporty child and he has access to pretty much any sport he could think of.

I can also see that he is lagging slightly behind those children that were at the private primary school when he has done assessments etc but that might just be his ability level rather than anything else.

Private vs state is a contentious issue and everyone has an opinion (I’ve heard them all) but you do what’s right for your child, go and visit all of the options, go to open days do your research. Look at the curriculum and how they teach, what extra curricular do they have access to, what is their pastoral care like, what trips to they go on.
You will know what’s right for your child.

It’s abit of a daft question as few will say “nah it was a total waste of money” if the kids are broadly happy fully functioning adults. You’ve no way of knowing if that would have happened anyway despite the school. Give yourself some credit as their parents!

Both my children went to a state school - which had a really good reputation. One is a doctor (medicine), the other a headteacher.
They had friends at private and boarding schools : one works in a gaming shop part time, another is an aspiring film maker - never made any films, one is unemployed.
Buying an education is not guaranteeing success. It’s trying to load the odds in your child's favour.
To really get the best chances for your kids maybe give them life experiences, a sense of community, & a wealth of travel.

Yep, worth every penny. My three dc's attend private school. States schools in my area are dreadful. Local state school in my town, closed. Grammar schools are excellent but mine dc's didn't pass the 11+ and the support for dyslexia is shocking. We downsides our home. Best decision we made. It is a small private school and they are very happy and the dyslexia support is superb.

No. DD went to a grammar, DS1 went to a private secondary and DS2 is now at the local state secondary. If I had to go back and do it again I’d send them all to the local state school.
DS3 has lots of local friends, (the other two didn’t as schools were a few miles away). He plays lots of club sport outside school and is on track to get excellent GCSEs.
The older two enjoyed school well enough but I think would have benefited from having more local friends and I believe would have done just as (or almost) as well academically. I disagree with the idea that private schools somehow magically imbue the students with confidence. That certainly wasn’t the case for my DS. If anything he may have flourished more in a less competitive environment. He didn’t benefit from the sports either as was expected to play for school teams and so couldn’t play for his local clubs (where the standard was actually higher).
That’s just our experience- it must be dependent on the child and the school whether private or state.

Depends on the schools. If I had the money, I would definitely have sent mine.

But it really is about the school. Teacher child ratio, class sizes, curriculum, how they nurture non academic pupils, teaching methods, ethos and culture

100% worth it imo.

If the state school offer is poor in an area or your DC are struggling in any way and you can afford it then 100% yes.

Private school doesn’t make you cleverer, but it is a nicer environment, and nurtures the children.