Page 12 | Took the shine off my Christmas present

notdoing · 2023-12-27T09:24:09+00:00

We had and family round for Christmas and Boxing Day and after hosting, finally got round to showing off my gift from DP. Obviously I was really pleased as it was something I've wanted for a while, not cheap so I hadn't just bought it myself already, and I made that clear. As I'm showing them what I got, my very close friend gets out her phone, searches for the gift and buys herself the exact same thing. It's something you'd wear so I did comment but she made out like it was fine, we won't wear them at the same time etc and I didn't want to ruin the mood. I just feel like it's not the done thing though and it really took the shine off it for me. I don't know if I'm being unreasonable or not but just honestly felt a bit gutted 😞

nutster · 27/12/2023 17:13

InsomniacA · 27/12/2023 17:11

But I think I do.

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i think you do too

Allfortheloveofabiscuit · 27/12/2023 17:21

I think this is really strange behaviour on your friends behalf. I wouldnt ever check with her if shes wearing the same item - she literally copied you, so if you both turn up wearing the same dress, Id make a small comment about how she said she would check first when she ordered it after you got yours (worded much better than that obvsiously) and let it go - if you look angry about it then, she will have the upper hand. You need to raise an eyebrow, smirk and roll your eyes then leave it

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 17:23

InsomniacA · 27/12/2023 17:11

But I think I do.

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Well you can’t, because she says it’s something you wear, and no one wears a bag.

nutster · 27/12/2023 17:51

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 17:23

Well you can’t, because she says it’s something you wear, and no one wears a bag.

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in that case…. could be a pair of socks!

Watchkeys · 27/12/2023 17:54

GustyFinknottle · 27/12/2023 14:45

It's evidenced on the thread that different people would have different responses to this, and unless you think that you're the final arbiter of who is right and who is wrong, you will understand my point.

Well, yes, the people on this thread who say the OP is making a fuss about nothing are the same people who shove their plates into the centre of the table the minute they've finished eating, or say they'll bring wine for Christmas lunch and then just bring one bottle, drink it and ask for more, or who roll in at 2am and play music loudly when there are relatives sleeping upstairs and neighbours who'll be disturbed. Barbarians: not acceptable in polite society. They do what they want without thinking of anyone else. They show no respect for others. Just like the OP's 'friend' who has done something almost perfectly designed to spoil her pleasure in a thoughtfully-chosen gift.

So, you think you're the final arbiter, then, or is it just your opinion that you know this much about all these strangers? It looks like quite a few people find this post funny - was it meant to be? :)

MacLaine · 27/12/2023 17:55

LOL at the thought of it being Pandora. 🤐

Calabou · 27/12/2023 17:57

GustyFinknottle · 27/12/2023 14:45

It's evidenced on the thread that different people would have different responses to this, and unless you think that you're the final arbiter of who is right and who is wrong, you will understand my point.

Well, yes, the people on this thread who say the OP is making a fuss about nothing are the same people who shove their plates into the centre of the table the minute they've finished eating, or say they'll bring wine for Christmas lunch and then just bring one bottle, drink it and ask for more, or who roll in at 2am and play music loudly when there are relatives sleeping upstairs and neighbours who'll be disturbed. Barbarians: not acceptable in polite society. They do what they want without thinking of anyone else. They show no respect for others. Just like the OP's 'friend' who has done something almost perfectly designed to spoil her pleasure in a thoughtfully-chosen gift.

Barbarians. 🤣 I think you ought to put the wine bottle down!

Beachwalker66 · 27/12/2023 18:12

I think it’s a Burberry Mac.

Friend was acting strangely ordering identical item there and then but I am surprised so many posters would actually fall out over it or be as upset as OP seems to be.

Huge overreaction imho

InsomniacA · 27/12/2023 18:21

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 17:23

Well you can’t, because she says it’s something you wear, and no one wears a bag.

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Many people use the word 'wear' to describe their use of a bag, though.

But it could just as easily be a loud Burberry item, or a Pandora bracelet.

InsomniacA · 27/12/2023 18:23

Beachwalker66 · 27/12/2023 18:12

I think it’s a Burberry Mac.

Friend was acting strangely ordering identical item there and then but I am surprised so many posters would actually fall out over it or be as upset as OP seems to be.

Huge overreaction imho

It could be a Burberry mac.

Or something like this:

Why the ‘ludicrously capacious’ bag on Succession was such a faux pas for the very wealthiest

In this week’s newsletter: Poor Bridget’s nouveau riche tastes are everything old money families like the Roys hate: loud, practical and the sign of a class interloper

https://www.theguardian.com/fashion/2023/mar/30/succession-burberry-bag-bridget

pikkumyy77 · 27/12/2023 18:59

Are you unfamiliar with the word crass and its obvious usage in English? You should look it up. Then and only then will the way this thread degenerated into e about specific types of cheap/showy pseudo valuable goods like LV, pandora, etc…make sense. The OP is being made fun of because having or displaying feelings about certain objects (though not daddy’s purdy, one’s horse or dogs, or the family Stubbs) is considered low class. And being low class is always attackable on mumsnet.

Purplewarrior · 27/12/2023 19:21

Sorry @pikkumyy77, can you explain what “daddy’s purdy” means?

I must be too low class to understand.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 27/12/2023 19:38

Purplewarrior · 27/12/2023 19:21

Sorry @pikkumyy77, can you explain what “daddy’s purdy” means?

I must be too low class to understand.

It's a make of shotgun, IIRC from DH's clay pigeon shooting days.

guineverehadgreeneyes · 27/12/2023 19:38

I genuinely don't understand (and yes, I anticipate getting jumped on for faux "struggling" with concepts) why some of you are seemingly so desperate to know what the gift was and how several of you are now suggesting it's likely to be an LV tote, a Burberry scarf or mac or Pandora jewellery.

OP has posted nothing that I can see that might indicate her taste in bags, clothing or jewellery? Nor her friend's taste, either.

Personally, I think LV products look hideous, the Burberry check pattern has been done to death (though I wouldn't say no to a nice beige trench) and I'm not keen on Pandora, either. But if other people like these brands - that's their choice.

The issue is how the friend behaved when OP showed the gift to her family (which was something she wanted and would have pleasure wearing or using).

What the gift was (and whether it's a brand some people might sneer at) has no relevance.

I can think of dozens of things that I might not buy myself but which would give me great pleasure to receive - a good leather biker jacket, a classy pair of tan brogue ankle boots, a nice leather laptop back - why are some of you so fixated on it being an overpriced LV bag or Pandora?

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 27/12/2023 19:39

pikkumyy77 · 27/12/2023 18:59

Are you unfamiliar with the word crass and its obvious usage in English? You should look it up. Then and only then will the way this thread degenerated into e about specific types of cheap/showy pseudo valuable goods like LV, pandora, etc…make sense. The OP is being made fun of because having or displaying feelings about certain objects (though not daddy’s purdy, one’s horse or dogs, or the family Stubbs) is considered low class. And being low class is always attackable on mumsnet.

I was responding to your suggestion that it's perfectly normal for adults to go "ooh look what my husband bought me for Christmas- isn't it lovely?" It isn't in my experience. I'd be very surprised at anyone over the age of 10 doing that. I'd think it was very odd behaviour for an adult.

I've no idea why you've got on your high horse about social class. Although you've now invented a whole new narrative about having feelings about valuable items (whether in money or sentimental terms) which I never said anything about.

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 19:46

I was responding to your suggestion that it's perfectly normal for adults to go "ooh look what my husband bought me for Christmas- isn't it lovely?" It isn't in my experience. I'd be very surprised at anyone over the age of 10 doing that. I'd think it was very odd behaviour for an adult.

I agree with you here. Fine if you’re wearing it and then someone comments you say oh h got it for me for Xmas. But I’ve never witnessed an adult passing his or her present round for everyone to look at. Normally you’d just say oh I got a lovely scarf or something.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 27/12/2023 19:48

The OP said:
I think my mum said come on, let's have a look what X got you. Was nice to get a minute to sit down and chat about our gifts after 2 days cooking and hosting for everyone!

The OP wasn't showing off, she was asked by a guest.

The original reference to an LV tote was presumably a knowing nod to another thread (from yesterday?) in which the OP asked if something could've been taken from her bag in a public place, but instead of saying 'my bag' she said 'my LV tote' & was taken to task by other posters for showing off, while she maintained she only specified so that people could judge how easy it would be to take & replace something without her knowledge.

nutster · 27/12/2023 19:57

@ifIwerenotanandroid

the op has no posting history at all other than this thread. So what are you on about re the bag?

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 27/12/2023 20:34

ifIwerenotanandroid · 27/12/2023 19:48

The OP said:
I think my mum said come on, let's have a look what X got you. Was nice to get a minute to sit down and chat about our gifts after 2 days cooking and hosting for everyone!

The OP wasn't showing off, she was asked by a guest.

The original reference to an LV tote was presumably a knowing nod to another thread (from yesterday?) in which the OP asked if something could've been taken from her bag in a public place, but instead of saying 'my bag' she said 'my LV tote' & was taken to task by other posters for showing off, while she maintained she only specified so that people could judge how easy it would be to take & replace something without her knowledge.

I wasn't referring to the OP.

I was referring to a poster who said If I had any guests coming in the days after Christmas, I'd be saying, 'Look at the lovely scarf DH bought for me! Isn't it nice?' That seems like very normal behaviour to me and I bet it happens in millions of homes across the UK....

It doesn't strike me as normal. Another poster however has now launched into class warfare on this point.

LittleMissSunshiner · 27/12/2023 22:20

This thread is deeply insane, no offence to the OP

People are so bitchy and argumentative and reaching.

No wonder people cannot live harmoniously on this planet. There's at least a third of all people here alone who don't want to get along with anyone under any circumstances it seems.

Vistada · 27/12/2023 22:24

nutster · 27/12/2023 15:19

i’d put money on it

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And the mean girls are out in force!

Gross.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 27/12/2023 22:29

nutster · 27/12/2023 19:57

@ifIwerenotanandroid

the op has no posting history at all other than this thread. So what are you on about re the bag?

'another thread (from yesterday?) in which the OP' means the OP on yesterday's thread.

Loulou560 · 27/12/2023 22:30

I think OP’s friend’s behaviour is odd, and certainly not something I would do. Saying that, I wouldn't give a monkeys if a friend did that to me. I’m not that attached to anything material that I own to really care if someone copied me. Don’t get worked up OP. Plenty of things in life to be more concerned about 👍

Blondeshavemorefun · 27/12/2023 22:35

Def a bit odd of friend

Does sound a little bit if you are Jealous

You have wanted this item but never bought it

Where as friend said oh that's nice and got it even tho it's costly

Guessing a bag /necklace or coat

Original poster

notdoing · 28/12/2023 00:47

"the op has no posting history at all other than this thread. So what are you on about re the bag?"

It's called a name change, plenty of posting history. But what an absolute bun fight you've been having over it all! Searching for my posting history 😅

OP posts: