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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

M&S for everyone else... Primark for DIL

176 replies

IrisVonEverec · 26/12/2023 19:25

Can't help but feel there is a message in the pjs handed out by MIL this Christmas.

The primark ones weren't even character based/specially chosen/christmassy. They're just grey all over. And there's no excuses for "don't really know her" as we've been together 20 years.

OP posts:
Itsallsostressful · 26/12/2023 20:15

Oh ffs pj's are pj's who cares where they are from 😂

Stuckinarut23 · 26/12/2023 20:15

I prefer my Tesco ones to m and s ones she got me. It depends if you actually like them I guess. Primark are normally great for PJ's.

OneRedBalloon · 26/12/2023 20:15

I totally get this, sometimes we forget our intuition is normally correct. My mother does similar. 3 children, at Easter she buys 2 Aldi chocolate rabbits and a Lindt one for the golden child.

Candycurrantbun · 26/12/2023 20:16

Itsallsostressful · 26/12/2023 20:15

Oh ffs pj's are pj's who cares where they are from 😂

Most of MN it would appear. They are far too posh to wear Primark PJs.

rwalker · 26/12/2023 20:16

I’d presume they were out of stock rather than her being a bitch
primark isn’t necessarily cheap nowadays granted cheaper than m and s

it’ll taken far more effort to go to primark and just buy for you than throw a pair in the basket in the shop she was already in

or she could possibly be re gifting

Charlize43 · 26/12/2023 20:16

Primark is the new Prada now. Obviously she's very au courant.

Fancycheese · 26/12/2023 20:16

MiddleagedBeachbum · 26/12/2023 20:13

Yeah she’s being a petty spiteful bitch.

Hope your DH can see it x

This is a bit much 😂 what a bitch for buying her DIL pjs. M&D often has an appalling selection to be honest. Id assume she thought the grey ones were nicer. I hope she doesn’t bother next year. Poor woman.

coldcallerbaiter · 26/12/2023 20:18

steff13 · 26/12/2023 19:57

This happened with my family's Christmas pajamas this year.

Show quote history

She might think her blood relatives are more important.

Its inconsiderate but that’s all it is.

You can favour your own mum over your mil, in the end most people favour their own, it’s primal.

Cherrysoup · 26/12/2023 20:18

What has your Dh said? (Presuming he noticed) The price difference is pretty large.

PyongyangKipperbang · 26/12/2023 20:19

Its the idea that "her" family are worth M&S and you are ... "That'll do"

Yes it is a slight and yes I would be pissed off. If you are the one that makes the effort at Xmas and birthdays, now is the time to stop. Or for her next birthday buy her something equally "That'll do" from Primark and leave the price tag on. In fact Iwould make a special effort to go there tomorrow, buy the same PJ's in a a much too large size (She is a ten? Buy a 16 etc) and gift her those for mothers day!

MerryChristmas23 · 26/12/2023 20:19

All made in the same factory OP, just means she paid silly amounts for M&S when Primark comes from the same production line, we just take 30 bins from the end line and put M&S tags and packing on them. I'd tell her that and tell her she's stupid for paying M&S prices for the same product

kitsuneghost · 26/12/2023 20:22

You are seriously on mumsnet on boxing day complaing your mil bought you less expensive jammies than her son and grandkids. Seriously!!!! Perhaps she should gift you some grips to make up for it.

byteme1011 · 26/12/2023 20:22

What a petty MIL don't rise to it but I'd be pissed off too

Lorrymum · 26/12/2023 20:23

I find Markies PJ sizes odd. Size 8/10 and then 12/14, one to small and the other to big.

AppleChristsBirthdayMacchiato · 26/12/2023 20:24

Oh come on, of course it's rude to single out the only non-biologically related member of the family like this, and it seems unlikely the MIL didn't go out of her way to not purchase all the PJs together which would be the simplest option.

IAmAnIdiot123 · 26/12/2023 20:24

Cherrysoup · 26/12/2023 20:18

What has your Dh said? (Presuming he noticed) The price difference is pretty large.

I doubt that tbh, primark isn't cheap anymore. Did the others all match OP? Or did she just pick ones she thought each person would like?

Ktime · 26/12/2023 20:27

Yanbu. Take her petty behaviour as confirmation that DH should be responsible for her presents.

Don’t do her any favours or make any special effect.

What did DH get her?

Electio7899 · 26/12/2023 20:28

Just regift anything you don’t want or ask for the receipt and take it back, no need to worry. You’d have to give more context to figure out if it was a snub - if she regularly shops at primark and M&S it’s hard to say.

I’ve got a bag of stuff ready to go from well meaning people giving me random stuff. It’s the season…

ThePoshUns · 26/12/2023 20:29

I really couldn't be bothered to be bothered about this

Coconutter24 · 26/12/2023 20:30

Lots of comments saying she’s being spiteful or forgot about you so picked some primark pjs up…. These are all just guesses no one hear knows you or your MIL. If I got a different brand of pjs to my DH and dc I wouldn’t even think twice! Maybe she didn’t do all her Christmas shopping in one go, maybe she bought yours first as she was in primark saw them and thought you’d like them so picked you a pair up. No one on here knows so don’t overthink it and just be grateful for your present

louderthan · 26/12/2023 20:31

Are they the soft grey jersey ones with the white trim? If so they're very sought after and keep selling out, so maybe she thought they were a bit special and you'd really like them?
I've got them in black and they're super comfy and great quality.

IAmAnIdiot123 · 26/12/2023 20:31

I've just looked at primark grey pj's online, the only adult set they have is £15. On M&S, excluding their personalised stuff, the most expensive set of m&s own brand pj's in any colour is £18 and they are a satin short set so not really winter appropriate. The rest are £15 or less. I don't see the issue.

WimbyAce · 26/12/2023 20:31

Can we have a picture to see if they look bad? If they look nice enough I don't see an issue, she may have just picked bits up at different times, didn't like any in your size in M&S who knows!

Tilllly · 26/12/2023 20:32

I probably would @Fancycheese if I thought it was a deliberate slight

Something like "shame the fabric on those pyjamas irritated my skin, still, somebody will make use of them"

But you are right, it would be very rude and I would only do it if I was sure it was a deliberate dig

Brefugee · 26/12/2023 20:32

ThePoshUns · 26/12/2023 20:29

I really couldn't be bothered to be bothered about this

and yet the OP who presumably knows the MIL better than any of us recognises the intended snub (as do the pps with the supermarket value brand chocolate and the aldi vs lindt easter chocolate)

leave all her stuff to DH from now on and don't give it another thought, OP

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