Unequal grandparent gifts

[JustAMinutePleass]

I have an only child. My siblings have 2-3 kids a piece. Just found out my parents set a £30 budget for my child’s present and bought £300 pianos as a ‘shared gift’ for each set of gc for each sibling. I asked why my son didn’t also get a piano (or even a larger budget equal to a proportion of the others) when he’s the only one of their 6 gc actually learning the piano and was told I was ungrateful.

I’m so, so pissed off. Bear in mind I’m hosting christmas as I’ve done for years. Aibu to kick them all out and call it a day?

And I don’t think it’d be the end of the world if you chucked them all out and cancelled Christmas! It’d definitely be a v high drama route though, potentially relationship-ending. Since your child hasn’t noticed I think I’d stand by my statement of dissatisfaction, don’t back down, but crack on with the day. Probably healthiest to park it for now and take the high road, but if you can’t, maybe pour your parents smaller glasses of wine/pass them smaller portions of dinner, and call them ungrateful if they complain?

I'm really sorry that they did something hurtful. Stings more when it's supposed to be a day that's almost "advertised" as being all smiles and joy. It really sucks and I'm glad your DC didn't notice. Hope you can make peace though, and don't let it ruin your day. Having a great day anyway would be a bit of a f you to them!

If the cousins aren't learning piano and your four year old is, buy a piano from one of them.

You can console yourself that a child who is NOT learning the piano would be very miffed at a shared piano as a gift and would probably let you have it for £30 so they can buy a computer game, while your kid probably got £30 of something they actually wanted from their grandparents.

No she didn't 😂

Ok. Your the family Scapegoat. It's your role that your DS will now inherit. You know all this, and should listen to your DH and not host again next year. History is repeating itself, and luckily your DS is probably young enough at the moment not to notice. Only you can break the cycle, it's your call.

my son didn’t also get a piano (or even a larger budget equal to a proportion of the others) when he’s the only one of their 6 gc actually learning the piano and was told I was ungrateful.

So…you agree that her child should get more then, seeing as equal would mean more 🙄

I must admit I'd be very grateful for them for not getting a piano for a 4 year old. My ears hurt for your neighbours just thinking about it

She quite clearly said ‘no one asked for a piano’

Shouldn’t get more than the others obviously or more because OP is hosting. OP started by asking why her child didn’t get a piano, a gift the others had to share.

This.

I would be tempted to serve up a comparatively frugal Christmas dinner, too.

Strict portion control, one small alcoholic drink per adult (kids get all the juice etc they want, though) and a "Here's-your-coat-do you-have-to-go?" early finish.

I'd find it hard to be nice to someone who was treating my child like a pariah, even if I was prepared to tolerate it for myself.

Sorry @Muchof mistake there!! Wrong post. Too much bucksfizz!

@JustAMinutePleass What did your boy actually receive for the £30? Did he like it?

Regardless of the monetary value, if he’s happy enough, surely he’s better off than the other kids, with their shared £500 piano that nobody wanted or asked for?

next year do not host and put that money to a bigger and better piano for your son! that is ridiculous giving your dc 30 and giving 2 300!! i always give each grandchild the same and they do not get presents to share with a sibling.

No she didn't. Read it again

Your 4 year old is learning the piano 🎹?

Serve dinner. Make sure the grandparents don’t get their favourites/the best items. If they question why they have turkey and sprouts and warm tap water and everyone else has a proper dinner with wine tell them to stop being ungrateful

Are you misunderstanding and being a dick on purpose?

I agree with your husband. Grin and bear it this year for the sake of your son but never host them again. I'd probably drop hints about being I'll so you can ask them to leave early. Send a message tomorrow explaining how hurt you are and why you won't be hosting in future.

That’s not 7nusual Mozart wrote his first piece at 5 was properly performing at 6

OP that is awful do you think you could go low contact after this - follow your instinct

😆😆😆😆

She said that in response to the other GC not asking for a piano ie others asking if perhaps they got the piano because that asked bit OP didn't. It's not the same as her child not actually wanting a piano or wouldn't have gratefully received one. As they obviously would have. Given they are learning.

This made me lol. Forget their pigs in blankets and roasties.

I can't see why they would do this, it's crap of them! Don't host those buggers again,

New Year Resoltion: work on boundaries and psyche up to saying no to hosting next year.

Tell your hubby you agree no more hosting and you need his help staying strong.