Page 23 | Married 2 years. DHs family forgot our anniversary. Mine remembered.

crossroads1 · 2023-12-12T13:45:20+00:00

DH's family forgot our anniversary, only been married 2 years. They remember all other important dates. But no effort for us. My family all remembered first thing in the morning and sent us both messages. Should i bring this up to DH? I just want to tell my in laws where to stick it!! Could this be my chance to distance myself from them? My get out of jail free card? I never liked them from the beginning.

pd339 · 14/12/2023 21:55

Yes definitely tell DH. Give him an opportunity to realise how batshit you are. Yeah

FlipFlop1987 · 14/12/2023 22:47

Frasers · 14/12/2023 09:43

See I find it strange you’d remember the date folks got married. I remember one family member. As they married the week before us and have a big party every single year. I couldn’t tell you any one else’s.

anniversaries are generally seen as between the couple to celebrate unless it’s a big one. If anyone else was getting involved in mine I’d think they were way over invested.

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I don’t think wishing someone a Happy Anniversary is ‘getting involved’ 😂

ScoR20 · 14/12/2023 23:27

You don't like them, they don't like you and so probably don't want to acknowledge the date you joined the family? 🤷🏻‍♀️

BusyMum47 · 14/12/2023 23:34

Really?? No one gives a crap about anyone else's wedding anniversary! As long as your husband didn't forget, there's no problem.

willWillSmithsmith · 15/12/2023 12:49

I’ve never heard of families doing something for someone else’s wedding anniversary. Maybe it’s a tradition in your family but I would think it’s not for 99% of the rest of us.

Read a bit more of your posts and see it’s a regular thing in dh’s family. All sounds too claustrophobic for me.

SaponificationQueen · 15/12/2023 18:45

So many people with negative responses. It is apparent that her family will say Happy Anniversary in their group family chat to everyone else. That doesn’t seem OTT or claustrophobic at all to me.

If I know someone’s anniversary, I will say Happy Anniversary. I probably won’t get them a card or anything, unless it’s someone I am close to, but saying Happy Anniversary really isn’t difficult.

Its ridiculous how many people here are berating her when she just feels bad that the family isn’t doing the same thing for her and her husband that they do for the rest of the family. She’s not asking for a huge party, or elaborate gifts, she’s just feeling bad because they ignored them when they don’t ignore anyone else on their anniversaries.

Ser people, get a grip.

Goodlard · 15/12/2023 18:50

SaponificationQueen · 15/12/2023 18:45

So many people with negative responses. It is apparent that her family will say Happy Anniversary in their group family chat to everyone else. That doesn’t seem OTT or claustrophobic at all to me.

If I know someone’s anniversary, I will say Happy Anniversary. I probably won’t get them a card or anything, unless it’s someone I am close to, but saying Happy Anniversary really isn’t difficult.

Its ridiculous how many people here are berating her when she just feels bad that the family isn’t doing the same thing for her and her husband that they do for the rest of the family. She’s not asking for a huge party, or elaborate gifts, she’s just feeling bad because they ignored them when they don’t ignore anyone else on their anniversaries.

Ser people, get a grip.

If I was you, I'd look at previous posts by the OP. That will probably tell you why the family don't wish her and her DH happy anniversary!

Chickenkeev · 15/12/2023 21:29

SaponificationQueen · 15/12/2023 18:45

So many people with negative responses. It is apparent that her family will say Happy Anniversary in their group family chat to everyone else. That doesn’t seem OTT or claustrophobic at all to me.

If I know someone’s anniversary, I will say Happy Anniversary. I probably won’t get them a card or anything, unless it’s someone I am close to, but saying Happy Anniversary really isn’t difficult.

Its ridiculous how many people here are berating her when she just feels bad that the family isn’t doing the same thing for her and her husband that they do for the rest of the family. She’s not asking for a huge party, or elaborate gifts, she’s just feeling bad because they ignored them when they don’t ignore anyone else on their anniversaries.

Ser people, get a grip.

People don't tend to remember though. Not out of badness, just other peoples's anniversaries aren't a thing you're supposed to remember.

JJWT · 16/12/2023 10:03

I would never in a million years expect anyone else to acknowledge my wedding anniversary. If you make a fuss you may just come across as needy/ high maintenance.

aitiaiti · 16/12/2023 11:55

Definitely YABU. Agreeing with the 100% of people on this thread saying it's a celebration for you and your husband.

Coyoacan · 16/12/2023 16:22

Aposterhasnoname · 12/12/2023 14:26

Sooooo, you openly admit you hate them and don’t appear to be making much effort to hide it. All they've got to do is forget to type a few random words and you’ll ditch them. They no longer have to deal with your drama, and they get to take the moral high ground when any one asks what went on, as you will look frankly unhinged. Sounds like a win to me.

This

My ExMIL did a lot worse things to me than forget a date. But she and FIL helped me so much with my dd, I could never have done it without them

ellyeth · 18/12/2023 20:48

My Mum and Dad never acknowledged our wedding anniversary. I wasn't that bothered.

I don't think it's reason for you to distance yourself from your in-laws. Not everybody sees the wedding anniversaries of other people as particularly special, so it's likely that no offence was intended.

asdfgasdfg · 21/01/2024 12:26

I don't send messages to my daughters for their birthdays let alone anniversaries.

BobbyBiscuits · 21/01/2024 13:31

My MIL used to send us anniversary cards, (that we did not ask for) but she stopped. My DH said it was because we didn't reciprocate by sending one to her! They were married before we were both born?! Ridiculous. I don't think anyone should celebrate it except you and your partner.