Page 13 | To ask if you have sex on your period

Toothurtyoclock · 2023-12-10T21:47:24+00:00

Regular user but name changed for this. I had a day out with a friend yesterday and we had a lot of girl chat. Somehow or another I said something along the lines of 'but I was on my period, so obviously we didn't have sex'. My friend was genuinely surprised by this and that I've never had sex on my period, ever. Not with DH, nor anyone prior. Honestly, it's not something I've even considered doing, kind of like one of the rules of life, death, taxes and can't have sex on your period. My friend says this is not her experience at all and says bar maybe the first few days when it's at it's heaviest and she feels the most uncomfortable, she and her DH have sex as much as they otherwise would. I spoke about it with DH to ask his thoughts and he's in the same boat as me, says he's just always assumed you don't do that and the few guy friends he has that he does talk about sex with, they don't have sex with their wives or girlfriends on their period either. I don't actually have many friends that I speak this openly about sex to so was just wondering what the wise women of Mumsnet think. Honestly, I feel like crap the first few days of my period but after that, I feel my normal self and it annoys me that I 'can't' have sex for the next 4 or 5 days so maybe this is something I need to reconsider but it's something I've not even considered before, I just always assumed it not done and never challenged it. Now I feel a bit foolish as I can't now work out how I really feel about it. DH says he's up for giving it a go if I'm comfortable with it but I don't know if I am yet.

Waitingfordoggo · 11/12/2023 21:26

NorseKiwi · 11/12/2023 21:11

My top tips for ladies would be.....

Buy a mooncup and its perfectly fine to have sex with it in (been doing it for 12yrs), it just gets pushed a bit higher up, it doesn't hurt and if you empty it out before you start having sex it doesn't tend to leak.

Has anyone heard of a period towel/sheet, they are made out of period panties fabric to throw on the bed, it resembles a throw and they seem to be new and advertised on FB and insta and out of stock, I havent got one, but I would buy one at some stage.

For those with heavier periods, you might consider "balancing your hormones" via reflexology once a month and if you get period pains take "mefenamic acid" is a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID) used to treat mild to moderate pain via your GP, that sorts you out. Its actually not natural to suffer when you are on your period, its your bodies way of telling you that something isn't functioning correctly and you should find out how to get it rectified, perhaps via a naturopath?

For those that get hormonal acne, just stop eating dairy, give it a month and you'll see a huge difference (butter and ghee will be fine to consume).

I don't mind having sex on my period, infact I had incredible sex the other day on day 1 of my period with my mooncup in. I couldn't be with a guy long term who thought it weird to not have sex on your period.

Thanks for the advice but I find it much easier and more convenient to just avoid sex while I’m on my period. Because I don’t want to have sex while I’m on my period and that is perfectly fine and reasonable.

But also- Mooncup- really?! Um, maybe if one’s partner has quite a short penis?

PricklePop · 11/12/2023 21:31

SylvieLaufeydottir · 11/12/2023 17:43

surely it is nice to have a break sometimes

...why?

Builds up excitement, I guess. A gap builds tension

Plinkplonkplink · 11/12/2023 21:32

Have done with previous partners but not dh. He thinks it’s too gross! Actually, he generally seems to find me gross and doesn’t want sex with me. But that’s another story!

thefamous5 · 11/12/2023 21:50

Not my thing but if you like it, crack on.

I don't actually know why it isn't my thing, just doesn't appeal to me but not because it's gross or anything.

I had this discussion with my friend, who is gay. She pointed out if they never had sex on periods, they would only be able to have sex 2/4 weeks a month which I guess is a very good point!

SaveMeFromMyBoobs · 11/12/2023 22:41

NorseKiwi · 11/12/2023 21:11

My top tips for ladies would be.....

Buy a mooncup and its perfectly fine to have sex with it in (been doing it for 12yrs), it just gets pushed a bit higher up, it doesn't hurt and if you empty it out before you start having sex it doesn't tend to leak.

Has anyone heard of a period towel/sheet, they are made out of period panties fabric to throw on the bed, it resembles a throw and they seem to be new and advertised on FB and insta and out of stock, I havent got one, but I would buy one at some stage.

For those with heavier periods, you might consider "balancing your hormones" via reflexology once a month and if you get period pains take "mefenamic acid" is a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID) used to treat mild to moderate pain via your GP, that sorts you out. Its actually not natural to suffer when you are on your period, its your bodies way of telling you that something isn't functioning correctly and you should find out how to get it rectified, perhaps via a naturopath?

For those that get hormonal acne, just stop eating dairy, give it a month and you'll see a huge difference (butter and ghee will be fine to consume).

I don't mind having sex on my period, infact I had incredible sex the other day on day 1 of my period with my mooncup in. I couldn't be with a guy long term who thought it weird to not have sex on your period.

Many things wrong with this.

You can get period products you can use while having sex. Moon Cup isn't one of them. Menstrual discs can be. I love my hello disc, though I still prefer to take out for sex.

Changes to diet etc does help some people, absolutely will not help all. And even those it can help it (e.g. some people with PCOS - I know 1 person it helped, 2 it didn't), while it will help ease some symptoms it doesn't fully 'correct' to average and they still very much suffer. I have endometriosis and no 'balancing of my hormones' will do anything. Sex during period does help ease the cramps temporarily, also makes the bleeding temporarily slightly heavier.

StillWantingADog · 11/12/2023 22:44

I might have done in the shower once or twice but I just can’t face the mess or the ick factor so it would be a hard no from me

LaurieStrode · 11/12/2023 22:45

Yes. i am menopausal now but loved the sexy, earthy feeling the hormones gave me each month, and found that sex alleviated any cramps.

But I had fairly light periods that only lasted 2.5 days or so, and it was easy enough to put down an old towel or do it in the shower. Never met a man who objected except my very first boyfriend, and he was somewhat clueless.

To each her own. No one should feel obliged to.

tenbob · 11/12/2023 22:54

NorseKiwi · 11/12/2023 21:11

My top tips for ladies would be.....

Buy a mooncup and its perfectly fine to have sex with it in (been doing it for 12yrs), it just gets pushed a bit higher up, it doesn't hurt and if you empty it out before you start having sex it doesn't tend to leak.

Has anyone heard of a period towel/sheet, they are made out of period panties fabric to throw on the bed, it resembles a throw and they seem to be new and advertised on FB and insta and out of stock, I havent got one, but I would buy one at some stage.

For those with heavier periods, you might consider "balancing your hormones" via reflexology once a month and if you get period pains take "mefenamic acid" is a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID) used to treat mild to moderate pain via your GP, that sorts you out. Its actually not natural to suffer when you are on your period, its your bodies way of telling you that something isn't functioning correctly and you should find out how to get it rectified, perhaps via a naturopath?

For those that get hormonal acne, just stop eating dairy, give it a month and you'll see a huge difference (butter and ghee will be fine to consume).

I don't mind having sex on my period, infact I had incredible sex the other day on day 1 of my period with my mooncup in. I couldn't be with a guy long term who thought it weird to not have sex on your period.

Sex with a moon cup?
Have you ever seen a moon cup?

How the actual hell is a man going to enjoy sex when he would be thrusting against this plastic stem? Even if you cut most/all of the stem off, it’s still going to have a hard pointy end

Unless he has a tiny penis or has a sounding fetish, that is
not going to be enjoyable for him

I’m not going to dignify the other nonsense in your post with a response. Curing acne by cutting out dairy. Genius.

ButterCupPie · 11/12/2023 23:14

One of the most annoying things about Mumsnet is how often one comes across the 'word' ick.

Hoovermehenry · 12/12/2023 07:39

‘One of the most annoying things about Mumsnet is how often one comes across the 'word' ick.’

ha! Yeah. Never heard anyone use in RL

QueSyrahSyrah · 12/12/2023 07:44

Until I met DH I was so uncomfortable with the idea that I wouldn't even have sex a day or two either side, and had been with Men who hated the idea too.

DH is so straightforward and blasé about it and makes me so comfortable that it's just the first 2 days I avoid now when it's heaviest.

ThreeRingCircus · 12/12/2023 07:49

I have never done it and wouldn't like to. I have heavy periods and feel awful for the first couple of days anyway but even after that sex is not at the forefront of my mind when I'm on my period. I've never asked DH, I don't think he'd mind if I did want to, he's not squeamish but it sounds unnecessarily messy 🤣.

If women want to and their partners are happy then go for it, but it's not for me.

SkySecret · 12/12/2023 08:42

Buy a mooncup

@NorseKiwi 🤣 yeah that’s not what they’re designed for and that generally wouldn’t work. Mine sits very low in my vagina (stem chopped off) and I can imagine it would be hugely uncomfortable for DP to ran his dick against the firm, pointy end! I also wouldn’t want it ramming against my cervix.

As mentioned upthread, there are flat discs designed for this, but cups really aren’t.

OhNaffOffYouWazzock · 12/12/2023 09:22

Loving NorseKiwi's hilarious tips! Thanks babes.

My top tip for you would be to never say panties 🤮

spookehtooth · 12/12/2023 11:42

QueSyrahSyrah · 12/12/2023 07:44

Until I met DH I was so uncomfortable with the idea that I wouldn't even have sex a day or two either side, and had been with Men who hated the idea too.

DH is so straightforward and blasé about it and makes me so comfortable that it's just the first 2 days I avoid now when it's heaviest.

That reminds me, twice when it came up for the first time it wasn't that the women I was with didn't want to, it was her default assumption was that I wouldn't want sex with her, and therefore she didn't express desire for sex during her period. As if what she wanted was wrong in some way.

It's fair enough, very early in a relationship or if it's causal with multiple partners or whatever but if it's exclusive & you trust each other then I can't see the issue. Possibly, even, the fact you can't do it safely with just anyone makes it that bit more intimate?

Cas112 · 12/12/2023 11:43

Yes, but not when im at my heaviest

BarbedButterfly · 12/12/2023 11:44

Yes we do. He isn't bothered and I don't get cramps or anything

heartofglass23 · 13/12/2023 17:02

If a man refused period sex I'd consider him gay. Period.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 13/12/2023 17:43

heartofglass23 · 13/12/2023 17:02

If a man refused period sex I'd consider him gay. Period.

Ummm… What?!? Men should be able to say no to sex for whatever reason just as much as women can!

BingoWings85 · 13/12/2023 18:57

No. But not because I think it’s inherently disgusting but because I just don’t feel at all horny during my period and never have.

Hoovermehenry · 14/12/2023 10:34

‘If a man refused period sex I'd consider him gay. Period.’

If a man doesn’t want to have sex with a woman while she’s menstruating then that’s his choice but if he has sex with women at all, he’s not gay.

Bunnyasmyname · 15/12/2023 18:51

Not quite sure why my admission of sex and oral (without tampons) has resulted in some vomit faces! Grow up.
Dread to think what you’ll do if I admitted I also like rimming (giving and receiving).

And I totally under the ‘chunks’ comment. Maybe clots would have been a better word? Maybe not! 🤣

Really has never bothered me or my male partners and would think twice about being in a relationship with someone who wasn’t as open minded as me or at least willing to try new things.

Waitingfordoggo · 15/12/2023 19:07

Dread to think what you’ll do if I admitted I also like rimming

I didn’t 🤮 about period stuff but I’m definitely 🤮 about that.

That doesn’t have to impact you though. A stranger on the internet finding your sexual preferences nauseating surely makes no difference to you?

JenniferD582 · 25/04/2024 20:51

TooManyAnimals94 · 10/12/2023 22:00

I get really horny on my period and whilst I avoid when it's heaviest, I find I'm actually more sensitive and have orgasms easier 🤷

@TooManyAnimals94 @Toothurtyoclock same here!!! I get very horny and I’m extremely sensitive on it. Super strong and intense orgasms plus it really helps my cramps