Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to absolutely hate people being in my house

159 replies

PullUpTheDrawbridge · 09/12/2023 23:45

I mean I totally hate it. Any form of guest (except family) has me muttering expletives under my breath or in my head within 20 mins. I just want them OUT!

OP posts:
Elfandwellbeing · 09/12/2023 23:48

Depend who it is and how much I like them but yes I agree somewhat,

Tacotortoise · 09/12/2023 23:50

Honestly? Yeah that's weird as fuck.

shnia · 09/12/2023 23:51

Are you my dog? Grin

Keilagh · 09/12/2023 23:51

I feel like I can’t relax if there’s a stranger in my house, like an electrician or something, but I wouldn’t feel THAT strongly about it.

FatFatMary · 09/12/2023 23:52

If I’m alone with a strange man in my house i.e gas check, tv licensing I have a low level fear they could kill me

VeniVidiWeeWee · 09/12/2023 23:52

I suggest you don't look up "Statutory Right of Entry".

RampantIvy · 09/12/2023 23:53

Why?

beautifullittletree · 09/12/2023 23:55

I'm autistic and I find it invasive so it never happenes

RainbowZebraWarrior · 09/12/2023 23:56

beautifullittletree · 09/12/2023 23:55

I'm autistic and I find it invasive so it never happenes

Ditto!

Alphabet1spaghetti2 · 09/12/2023 23:58

I hate it too. No one beyond Dh and certain trades people are invited past the front door. Unless it’s an expected delivery / trade, I don’t answer the door either, batteries are removed asap.

ColourMeBlue · 09/12/2023 23:59

Absolutely.i hate visitors even family.i have a tiny living room and it's enough with 6 of us living here.Having added people in the living room is a big no from me😂

Coffeeandabookplease · 10/12/2023 00:01

Same

MeinKraft · 10/12/2023 00:02

Yes but mainly because people only ever come to my house when I'm not expecting them, the place is a tip and I'm in my pyjamas at an embarrassing time like 4pm.

CosmoChops · 10/12/2023 00:04

Same, although I even struggle with family visitors..... am autistic though, so any change of routine, especially involving socialising, is inherently challenging!

Icopewhenihope · 10/12/2023 00:28

Absolutely hate it with a passion.

Dazedandcovidconfused · 10/12/2023 00:28

Same it’s not weird at all

maddiemookins16mum · 10/12/2023 00:29

It’s quite unusual to have such an extreme reaction to this.
But then this is MN I suppose.
Back in the real world however……….

Hermittrismegistus · 10/12/2023 00:30

Why do you allow visitors then? I hate visitors so don't even answer the door if one turns up.

RampantIvy · 10/12/2023 00:34

maddiemookins16mum · 10/12/2023 00:29

It’s quite unusual to have such an extreme reaction to this.
But then this is MN I suppose.
Back in the real world however……….

I agree, although several posters have stated that they are ND.

I would find it odd if an NT person suffered such an extreme reaction to someone daring to encroach on their property.

Do the non door answerers never order anything online? How do they get their deliveries if they won't answer the door?

Original poster
PullUpTheDrawbridge · 10/12/2023 00:36

I'm not autistic but sometimes wonder. On some levels I am definitely ticking a lot of boxes. Others not at all.

I am currently enduring a sleep over for DS birthday. It's the noise and demands and mess and everything being topsy turvey. Also the social dynamics. I am almost too aware of how the group is functioning/ how everyone feels.

I also feel constantly over vigilant as if something could go drastically wrong at any moment.

Before people come I am weird about cleaning. I've never lived in a show home and go crazy trying to get it up to scratch before people come. (I clean every day to a lesser degree so it isn't awful, just messy/ tatty/ usual)

How do you relax about it all? I just can't imagine ever finding it pleasant

OP posts:
Hermittrismegistus · 10/12/2023 00:38

Do the non door answerers never order anything online? How do they get their deliveries if they won't answer the door?

Look through to spy hole. If it's a delivery person then answer it, if it's anyone else then ignore.

herintu · 10/12/2023 00:40

Same here. My house, my space. I tolerate tradesmen but won't have a cleaner or babysitter or playdates. Never have friends over. I used to have family visitors but I was sick of the judgment so have stopped that now.

I do answer the door for deliveries but they never come in so that's fine. But I'm getting a parcel box soon so I won't have to deal with that for much longer.

Original poster
PullUpTheDrawbridge · 10/12/2023 00:45

Hermittrismegistus · 10/12/2023 00:30

Why do you allow visitors then? I hate visitors so don't even answer the door if one turns up.

Because I have children who want play dates, mainly. Then the parents seem to want to linger for cuppas at pick up. Rude not to...

Inviting my own friends over is just not a thing I ever do, but I have a few friends who invite themselves and I can only say no a certain number of times before it's rude. I'd much rather meet out but if I've been invited to someone's house I feel I have to return the offer.

OP posts:
shoutandpout · 10/12/2023 00:46

I'm fine with family and lack of friends visiting occasionally but can't stand tradespeople coming inside even if their pleasant... it's just so awkward for me and I prefer if my partner was around to deal with them.

Keepitweird · 10/12/2023 00:47

I just don't like people Xmas Grin