Do you find this offensive like I do and would you comment on it?

[Sunandnomoon]

Shared by an elderly friend of my mum’s on Facebook. I find it offensive but I’m debating whether it’s worth the hassle of saying so.

It’s certainly not kind, it’s condescending and misogynistic. I’ve known her my whole life and I’ve never seen her be unkind before, actually she did my mum a great kindness many years ago, so I’m not looking to be confrontational or mean.

I just think shit like this being unchallenged makes the world a little bit worse off every day.

It's not offensive

How so?

I think it's offensive to both women and men

I might gently express that I could see she probably thought she was giving a positive message to women, but that now this sort of message about modesty couched in terms of 'but women are so precious' is seen very negatively because it's putting all women's value into marriagability, and pressure on women to not express themselves rather than in men to control themselves, which most can and do when confronted with a scantily dressed woman. It is possible to address without being confrontational, I will say things like 'To most people's minds I think this will seem...' or 'it's less acceptable now because...' so you're making them think, not having a go

Take a selfie and ask for their opinion on your Christmas treat to yourself:

scrunch bum leggings

Someone clearly needs to clue her in to the fact that women got both rights to get educated and rights to employment (and to hold assets in their names); and therefore don't have to sell their "assets" in exchange for marriage.

They should also clue her to the fact that many men marry but then leave their "mine" for a different one, and if she's lucky the woman gets a bit of equity and some meagre child maintenance; so depending on that investment and extraction lasting decades is foolhardy. The marrying kind can act just like the bandits; they just commonly take longer.

You also see a few weird men hanging round the edges of the dance floor leching after them and getting progressively bitter and spiteful that they wouldn't have a hope in hell of getting within yards of them. I believe that these men tend to find each other in certain corners of the Internet where they sit in their mums basement insulting women through the safety of a keyboard. Ive heard that sometimes they lose their way and end up on MN. But I don't believe that.

This!

Also worth pointing out that (having just read about a historic case of this), plenty of men in the "good old days" cheated on/had mistresses and eventually left their wives; often left them in poverty.

So this mythical investment and extraction for life, in response to closely guarded 'assets" was never a certainty. It's even less likely to be in our evolving society.

I think you've mistaken this forum for Incelnet...

I see a lot of those ‘We drank from a hose and played out till the streetlights came on and it didn’t do us no harm’ type of posts from people and I just roll my eyes. Nothing you can do about it, it’ll just cause an argument

We did all that but not everyone survived unscathed

I despair...

"Diane" needs to have a fucking word with herself...

How very Coventry Patmore (Angel in the House).

A woman, like the Koh-i-noor, Mounts to the price that's put on her.

It's an awful post and I find it offensive.
I wouldn't say anything to the woman who posted it though. There's so much crap on facebook I really don't want to get involved in heated discussions about things like that every time I see them. I have hidden people before who post a lot of crap like that. I'm only on facebook to see pics of my friends and their kids growing up and cats, lots of cats. I live abroad so it is a nice way to stay in touch.
What I don't want is my feed full of memes and other crap like this post.

What I might do in that case, and have done with other similar posts, is find where they shared it from and report it to facebook, rather than cause bad feeling with the person who posted it. Sometimes people post things "innocently" without really thinking, sometimes it's because of the way they were brought up, being from a different time and not having moved forward. The posts can be offensive but the person probably did not mean to offend.

Usually I would ignore, that's my go to reaction on the older generations posts. But I'd be sooo tempted to comment that maybe it's the illegal miners that should be challenged and taken down.

It is an awful post, as bad as the actual picture.

I really dont want to read misogynistic posts, but I also really dont want to see people's arses hanging out either. Or guy's bellies in the summer.

Well the post in the OP might be sexist, but your post is spectacularly ageist.

So now we know where the expression, "Getting your rocks off," comes from.

What are you even talking about? What Darwinian nightmare is this?

men cant even open a door now for a lady as they cry rape possibly why they stand at the side of the nightclub watching the 'show'...

What??

Did you miss the punctuation classes at school? Wtaf are you on about?

OP, it might be load of idiocy, but no, you shouldn't comment. Facebook isn't the place to address this stuff. A public spat doesn't help anyone, and I'm afraid you're the one who would come off worst.

My mum's ex-bloke, who I'd always liked, posted (or reposted) some absolute junk that really made me think less of him. Initially I'd send him links to debunking sites (privately, there was no need to humiliate him publicly) but in the end I just unfollowed him.

He's a good bloke. He's my appallingly behaved elderly and disabled mother's only remaining friend (she's now in care) when he'd be better off just walking away as she gives him a hell of a lot of grief. But he's so decent he doesn't feel he can abandon her, and my brother and I are grateful for him every day.

So yep, if this woman is a good friend to your mum, let this stuff wash over you. Unfollow her, and focus on the good in her.

I'd confront an elderly woman,I am one myself and it really bugs me how friends and acquaintances of my own age have become such silly old fogies and think they are passing on opinions everyone will agree with.

Well it's a good thing I don't give a crap about their opinions. They wouldn't approve of the way I dress, despite it being modest enough for my church, because I'm a Goth. (They wouldn't consider me a Christian either. 🤣 ) Meanwhile, my point still stands. Judging someone's morality by the way they dress is still ridiculous. It was ridiculous back in 2003 when I was asked if I worshipped Satan, such a cliché!

*Men are called to be modest, too. Like, not showing off an amazing gym bod etc."

Called by whom?

@headachy58 Myth confirmed, you are a bloke. How old are you?