To complain about teacher's behaviour

[Ilovechocolate87]

Last night after tea, DD (6) said to younger DD (2) 'Don't you dare do that' (touch her food) in a menacing voice.It isn't something we would say, as I think it's a nasty way to speak to someone, so i asked her where she got it from, to which she replied that her teacher had shouted at a boy in her class (year 1) 'don't you dare interuppt me when I'm talking' and re-inacted it in a thunderous sort of voice.

If she was telling me the teacher was saying such things to her I would be in no doubt to complain, as its clearly threatening behaviour, but as it wasn't at her (and she confirms she has never shouted at her) I'm on the fence whether to say anything or not about it .I've re-iterated to DD not to speak to her little sister like that, explaining that even if the teacher did it, it is still wrong.She told me when I asked that it doesn't scare her when the teacher shouts (she has very sensitive hearing and is often scared if we shout at home) but i'm not really liking that she is seeing someone who should be a professional and a role model behaving in that way towards any child.

Yep

This is where all this namby pamby gentle nonsense has got us - you think people disagreeing with each other is bullying. It’s pathetic. You’ve obviously never experienced real bullying.

So how would you deal with a constantly interrupting child?

I'm very firm with children interrupting my lesson. They are disrupting the learning of others which is unacceptable.

I’d never insist my husband goes to the toilet before a long car journey but I do to my child.

The thing is they are not adults. They take time to mature and they do need to be told firmly

I think this is where a lot of problems stem from in our society

Adults should (hopefully) have more self regulation

I would speak to them respectfully. Firmly but respectfully. I would also see if there was anything I could put in place to help the DC with not interrupting.

I mean to stop interrupting

It's fine for them to tell a dc off if they are the teacher as far as I'm concerned

Insisting is not threatening. There may be things you insist your husband does too.

@UndertheCedartree

What would you put in place to stop them interrupting?

What if you'd tried lots of things and reminded them many many times before?

You can tell a DC something firmly but also respectfully.

I personally think a lot of our problems in society come from people treating their DC like shit, shouting at them, hitting them, punishing them all the time. I just don't think any of that is necessary.

And the best teachers my DD has had have not be disrespectful to the DC.

Like what?

The thing is regarding society the majority follow the method of punishing kids and talking to them in a disrespectful tone. So if there are problems in society it seems more likely that would stem from most people do.

Maybe

Who knows

That's the thing the teachers that have 'reminded them many times before' are those that don't put anything in place they just keep repeating themselves and somehow expecting if they keep doing the same thing it will have a different result.

It would obviously completely depend on the DC and situation what I would put in place but for some DC a small fidget toy would help.

@UndertheCedartree what teaching qualifications and experience do you have? You still haven't said what should happen when pupils have repeatedly been asked calmly and respectfully to be quiet and that's been persistently ignored.

Cross post.

Not sure it’d work as I imagine a lot of parents would ask that their child be in a class with a teacher who’d be strict to all the other kids but gentle to theirs.

In my experience, fidget toys can be more of a distraction to everyone when they are launched across the room, spun in others eyes and broken.

The only thing that works for me is to sit the child with an adult who they can whisper to rather than calling out.

As you can imagine, this involves staff and funding...

You don’t know anything about me. So surmise to your heart’s content.

The treatment the OP has received on this thread has been shocking, Members of the teaching profession have given a glimpse into what happens in the classroom.

I have. I've explained you need to help a DC to do things. You can't just keep repeating yourself over and over.

I do have a lot of experience (education psychology) when I was younger but in more recent years I have learnt a lot from observing DD's teachers when I was in the class helping out/doing an activity or on a trip.

A primary teacher has got THIRTY children to not just watch for a short period but to actually educate.

They have to shout occasionally. They have to make themselves heard!!

Raising a child to be unable to cope with a raised voice does not make for a resilient adult. Don't worry op your DC is fine.

I would 100% want my child in the strict class with the teacher who takes zero shit.

I like there to be consistency with how i parent at home.

As I said it really depends on the DC. Some get on with this really well. And yes of course there are constraints due to funding especially now.

Oh I see. No experience of actually managing a classroom then. So what would you do when children are openly and persistently defiant? As in "don't you tell me what to do. You're not my mum"?

😂

You have no idea of the distraction that can be caused by so-called fidget toys...

You're simply replacing one problem with another.