how did you come to terms with getting older?

[lemongrab33]

I can't cope with nasolabial folds/marionette lines so I've just had filler and happy with the result. I don't mind small crows' feet etc. but the nasolabial folds really got to me.
I feel ridiculous as I'm only in my 30s, my ageing is only just getting started.
I am planning to continue procedures as time goes on, I am just not sure how I'll find ageing, I know it's such a gradual process but still.
Is there anyone here that feels depressed about their looks and mourns their younger looks?
I hate the ageism towards women and the idea that men are more attracted to youth. Men don't face anywhere near the amount of pressure women do and I feel stupid for buying into it.

Exactly what I was going to say.
30s @lemongrab33 ? Really. I think you maybe need to grow up before you worry about growing old. Your obsession with superficial issues of appearance is weird.

This is a problem that needs fixing in the mind, not the body.

I know what you mean OP- I think your thirties is the tipping point where you start to look ‘worse’ in some ways (in that age shows so that can be your perception). I’m a similar age and had some light Botox and have started using Skin + me which had really helped. I never ever thought I’d do Botox but I have a really deep line between my brows already and it made me look grumpy constantly which I hated.

I had a friend who died in a car accident aged 29 & another who died aged 37 from cancer leaving behind 2 young children. I'll be damnded if I'm going to worry about ageing! Please try & work on your self worth, every one of us contribute s to society/life in some way another & I'm not talking about looks xx

I was going to say I’m thankful for the signs I’m getting older. Have never been happy with the way I look anyway but I’m loved, alive and aware life could be a lot harder than my experience of it so far. Also I don’t have the money to try and do anything different and would be worried about looking like those who go too far if I did.

I'm 52 and perfectly happy with the way I look. I don't take any particular steps to look younger. I wear very little make-up, don't colour my hair (to be fair, I have very few greys), don't have any treatments. Yes of course I look different from when I was in my 20s, but that's just what happens It would be very scary if I didn't look older! Maybe it would bother me if I thought I looked particularly old for my age. I think I probably look young-ish, but I always have done. Or maybe that's just wishful thinking. I don't know.

I've not "come to terms" with looking older, as I don't feel there is anything to come to terms with. Maybe because my looks have never been particularly important to me. I've always been pretty average looking.

Coming to terms with getting older (not just looking older) is a whole different thing. The growing awareness of the mortality of those around me. The knowledge that I am going to slow down, that things are going to start hurting and becoming harder. That realistically there are unlikely to be more than 25-30 years of active healthy life left and possibly much less (my very healthy, active mother was diagnosed with cancer at 65 and died at 66). And 10 years less than that for my husband. All that is much harder to come to terms with, but I am using the growing awareness as a motivation to prioritise the important things, to future-proof my life, and to count my blessings!

Op you will look your age no matter what you do. People with fillers don’t actually look younger.
be strong, be healthy and use your mind

I am twice as old as you are and my concerns are not about how I look but about the pain I am in.

I am surrounded by people of a similar age and they all look great - as I do! They have wrinkles and smile lines and frown lines etc. - but they look what they are: women with experience of the world and stories to tell and great personalities.

Please don't start worrying about this now! - there is more to come and either you accept it and smile, make friends, pursue your interests and live, or you become a crabby old bat one day!

There is pain waiting round the corner - smile and enjoy life while you can!

62 here. It's actually incredibly liberating! All those fucks that I used to give have fucked off

Re nasolabial folds/marionette lines
I didn't know what these were till I joined MN.

I had to have masseter botox for grinding my teeth and I was terrified.

I hope I never need it again!

But, such is the insidious nature of these things, while I was having stuff injected into my face...
I asked the dentist if he thought anything could be done for my forehead wrinkles. Luckily he said immediately, "don't do it, they're not visible to anyone but you - and also your face shape means you'll have hooded eyes for weeks".

And then it clicked - the reason make up demos now always mention hooded eyes is because people are having that problem from botox....which they seem to get younger and younger.

I spent the summer dating a man half my age, which made me self conscious.

So after not caring about it for a long time, I suddenly looked at lots of things.

I was quite stunned how paranoid you can get about a perfectly normal face.

I think I've let go of it now!

I mourn my friend who will never get old or see her children grow up .... not the lines on my face.

I am in my 50s and dont have time to worry about what I look like because I am having too much fun, now DC are grown and I have more time to myself.

Mostly, I think I look fine. I tend not to spend a huge amount of time looking in mirrors for flaws in my face. I am more concerned about being a healthy weight and staying active.

I just saw a YouTube video about a young woman who died of cancer, leaving behind a young family. Just some perspective op.

I honestly couldn't care less about ageing and have no idea what the stuff you are worried about even is, I don't understand the terms. Would never have a 'procedure'.

What's the point in trying to fight the inevitable. Embrace it imo.

I don’t care much about how I look but I’m absolutely devastated that the playgroup/ playground / feeding the ducks / chatter at the school gate / play with painting stage of my life is over and will never return.

Me too. It goes so quickly.

@Mintesso @SanexExpert
I will happily feed the ducks and play with paints with you 😂

Having children works

First world problems luv

Get it into perspective

Is there anyone here that feels depressed about their looks and mourns their younger looks?

Not really. I was never a beauty when younger so I didn't have much to "lose".

I saw a depressing sight in the beauty department in Flannels today. Several sales girls were having a make up lesson at one of the make up counters and every single girl had the tell tale trout pout of over filled lips.

If we post here, we live in the first world probably.

I think people should appreciate the fact that they get to become 'old'. I was very attractive when I was younger, (although I didn't see it then). Now, I really couldn't give a crap what I look like day to day. I'm almost 40, have a bit of a belly, but have finally accepted myself for who I am. The older I get, the less I give a shit!

I thought it would bother me, but it's not really. I'm mid 40s. I don't really have any wrinkles, but I don't look much younger than that. I still make a bit of an effort.
To me, older usually means more interesting. That's true of most things and most adults. There are worst things than looking old. I'd rather have a chat or be friends with someone who looked like they'd lived a life, than someone who looked like they'd spent their afternoon getting botox.
I just relish the feeling of caring less what other people think of me. I am who I am. I love me. That's how you come to terms with it.

@EmmaEmerald

First World problem

Learn to pronounce

nounINFORMAL
plural noun: First World problems
1 a relatively trivial or minor problem or frustration (implying a contrast with serious problems such as those that may be experienced in the developing world)."it's a First World problem, but still if you're staying at a 5-star resort you expect some decent service"

If we post here, we live in the first world probably.

Think you missed my point

This is so.true I'm 50 today its my birthday im.embracing. it ,its definitely better than the alternative!