To be embarrassed to tell anyone in real life of my major achievemen?

[10andcounting]

Today I've achieved a goal that I set 7 years ago.

Finally into BMI overweight category for the first time in my adult life.

I'm 50ish and have been trying for so long to achieve this.

I have no siblings and although plenty of close friends my humiliation at being fat for so long isn't something I share.

I lost a lot 5 years ago, then got a fuckit mentality and put 2/3rds of what I lost back on like a decking idiot.

I've battled and battled and finally hit that 30 today.

I know 30 is still unacceptable but it's a big step for me in the right direction.

I'm sure people still look at me and judge, but I try not to let it affect me.

Happy to be candid about this but possibly not a full AMA.

I feel quite flat about it to be honest and not sure why.

I think it's because I don't have a suitable confidante, so maybe there's folk on here who I can anonymously share with and they can empathise, maybe that'll lift my spirit and inspire the last push?

Nah OP, it's discipline that keeps you going after the will power wanes.

You've got it 👍

Well done you !I am overweight and slowly loosing the fat and it’s bloody hard work! Most importantly you must be feeling physically so much better. Keep going 👏👏X

Well done 😃

I totally get you, because a couple of weeks ago I was looking for people who I could tell the exact same thing to!

💪 😄

That's awesome, well done OP!

Can I ask if you have any tips for success? I am struggling myself.

Well done - that's brilliant! I'm still aiming for 'only' overweight, it's a bloody hard slog to be consistently in calorie deficit long enough to achieve what you have.

Be proud, you've done an incredible thing for your body. Keep treating your body well and you can hopefully glide through your 50s in a better shape physically and mentally because you've made such an amazing change.

You are brilliant

You know what, that's absolutely amazing! Well done!

I'm sat here thinking I could do to shift a few lbs, and eating a chocolate bar. So you've made me put it down and decide to stop being lazy about it.

Well done again! I'm super happy for you

Good for you OP, that must have been really challenging.

Why not celebrate an achievement. People who love and care for you will be delighted for you!

Brilliant!

I have a diet thread running at the moment and I'd love to be able to say the same in a few months.

@10andcounting Well done on your massive(pardon the pun) achievement. The feeling flat is understandable because nothing changed in the world around you to reflect this achievement! The scales didn't cheer, there was no fanfare, if you go to GP the focus will be on the road in front of you not behind you.

In 12 months I've gone from BMI of 38.6 to 31.4, bf has been supportive all along, but last weekend he said he saw me standing at the window and could really see the weight loss, and then we walked up a steep incline which we had never attempted before and I didn't get breathless, he celebrated that win with me too.

Keep going now

Solidarity, OP and bloody well done! I'm a 33.7 BMI right now and halfway through my weight loss goal after many years of a 'complicated relationship with food', you might say!

Just keep reminding yourself how far you've come. I was only thinking this morning how, after so long as a 'bigger person', it's really hard for me to think of myself as any smaller, despite clothes hanging off me now! Psychologically, I'm still stuck with the image of myself as 'fat' and perhaps that will never change absolutely.

However, reaching a goal you've held onto for 7 years is a truly great achievement and you should be really proud of it.

Well done! That's amazing! I completely get it. I've lost 8st so far and another 3 to go and I finally feel like I'm on the home stretch. It was a fucking struggle at times but I always said I wanted to go slow and steady. 2 steps forward, 1 step back is fine because overall it's still progress and It's given me time to embed new habits bit by bit so I know they're sustainable for the rest of my life.

I think weight is such a sensitive thing. People often don't want to comment on it in case they offend someone but there's no way close friends haven't noticed. I've always been open about my feelings and goals so I've been lucky to have a lot of encouragement which helps a lot.

Tell your friends how proud you are of yourself. It's easy to say don't be scared but I understand how ingrained that feeling might be if you have a lot of internal doubt or shame. You don't need to make a big thing of it. Next time you're speaking to friends and they ask "what have you been up to?" tell them you weighed yourself, you now weight XX which mans you've lost XX and you're so happy about it. Or maybe buy yourself something really nice to wear - something out of your usual comfort zone - and when someone comments on it say "oh thanks, now that I've lost some weight, I'm loving having more choices". Anything that opens up a conversation and let's the people around you know that it's something you can talk about. I don't doubt people will have picked up on your insecurities, even if you haven't discussed them so they might be reluctant to say something first. It doesn't even be close friends, it's nice when anyone notices.

Honestly, once people start noticing and cheering you on, it makes you feel so much better about the process.

Even if you can't get to that stage, you should still take pride in what you've achieved without other people's validation. It's nice to have if it's important to you but you need to be able to be proud of yourself first. Think about what your target weight is. What sorts or activities will you be able to do then? What sort of things will you be wearing? How different will your life be compared to what it was when you started? Anything that helps show the different you've made to yourself.

Keep going OP. You're doing great!

Well done @10andcounting I have similar problems - and I'm still struggling. I understand how hard it is. You have every right to be feeling proud of your achievement. The difficulty now, once you have lost whatever you still need to lose is keeping it off.

I lost 3.5 stone just before Covid Hit - Put it all back on, as I am a comfort eater. Then tried again - lost 3 stone and then my Mother died and all hell broke loose with my sibling as I was Executor of Mum's Estate. Put it all back on again and am struggling to get back to concentrating on losing weight for the third time

Wishing you all the very best.

Go you! Well done 😍

Well done, OP. Onwards and downwards!

That's amazing OP!! Well done, you should be proud !

What did you do? Please tell us more.

Well done! I bet you feel loads better for it too.

Well done, that is an amazing achievement. I know how hard it is. My weight has been like a yo yo all my adult life.
Currently I have 14lbs to go to get to just under 30 bmi and I am determined to do it. My long term aim is around 26 bmi. I have got to 25 before but it was unsustainable for me and I will be happy at 26

Well done!! Brilliant achievement 👏

Yes OP! You are fabulous! Keep going!

Thank you all again! I'm shocked at the positivity.

@divinededacende thank you for your kind inspirational words

Massive well done OP!!! Amazing achievement.

Massive congratulations. You have done future you an enormous favour, by increasing the chances of a long and healthy old age to enjoy with the family. The effort is worth it. You are worth it. You are right to celebrate this milestone and be proud.

Just checked on my starting BMI:

53.3

😳

Congratulations and please tell us how you did it. I've been overweight since I was 14 and I'm now in my 60s.

Well done op that’s amazing !

You should feel very proud of yourself , it’s not easy !